How I Wet Your Mother/Quotes
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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"How I Wet Your Mother"
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- Mr. Burns: Now, Simpson, how is it that you alone managed to keep your moral compass pointed to true north?
- Homer: Well, sir, before I do anything, I stop and ask myself: "What would Jesus and Mr. Burns do?"
- Homer: Ah, nothing better than a lazy Saturday morning lying in a warm, moist bed, because weekends are... Moist?! I wet the bed! The one embarrassing thing I've never done!
- Homer: Oh Death, you're a life saver.
- Bart: Thank you, Death. May I ask, what's taken so long with Larry King?
- Death: I am not...
- Mona Simpson: Death.
- Homer: Mom?!
- Bart & Lisa: Grandma
- Marge: So you're alive?
- Mona: No. But I live on in Homer's dreams.
- Homer: Just like my hair.
- Marge: It's Jennifer Aniston's hair on Friends.
- Homer: Exactly like Chandler, always criticizing.
- Lisa: Listen, everyone. We should fall asleep in this dream. One minute at this level equals two hours one dream level below.
- Bart: Wait, dreams have rules?
- Lisa: Everything has rules, Bart.
- Bart: Not me, when I hit the dance floor.
- Lisa: We're actually entering Dad's dreams?
- Professor Frink: Yes, yes. You see, it's the only way you can uncover the psychological trauma that is causing your father's secret shame.
- Marge: Why does Maggie have to go?
- Professor Frink: What am I, a babysitter?!
