The Simpsons: Tapped Out Level 31 content update

This is a gameplay over an upcoming update with Wolfcastle.

Gameplay

McBain, Scene 1: Prologue

Wolfcastle Okay, I am ready to film my newest high-budget action blockbuster. It vill go beyond cutting edge 3D and into... the fourth "D". Actually, the fourth dimension is impossible to apply to present day video viewing methods and should be considered a misnomer in this context. Wolfcastle Impossible is just one more obstacle to crush... McBain ...for McBain! The task is Make McBain Shoot an Action Scene

McBain, Scene 2: Prologue

McBain Ack! My flawlessly developed body needs sustenance! McBain No time to manufacture my usual ultra-protein-creatine-glutamine digestive cleanse, my hunger demands satisfaction. McBain I vill accept this "Gulp n' Blow" rather than face starvation ... this time. The task is McBain Eat At Gulp 'N' Blow McBain Ack! The food, it sticks in my throat! McBain gulp... *shudder yech! McBain No need to vorry. The danger has passed. The only question vhich remains is… McBain Who is responsible? Squeaky-voiced teen Um, what are you talking about? You choked on a curly fry. McBain Only one man vould make an attempt on my life in broad daylight like this. McBain Mendoza!

McBain, Scene 3: Big Explosions

McBain Mendoza and his army of Commie-Nazis have returned. McBain Who else would dare to employ the murderous curly fry against me? Squeaky-voiced teen Um, sir, I'm pretty sure that was just an accident. McBain It was clearly an attempt on my esophagus by lowlife scum, random bystander. Someone has to stop them. McBain And that someone... is me. The task is Make McBain Battle Commie Nazis

McBain, Scene 4: Bad Cop, Bad Cop

McBain The first thing I must do is find out who is backing Mendoza. McBain But it vill take forever to beat confessions out of all of his men. McBain I have to be villing to make that sacrifice. The task is Make McBain Visit the Penitentiary

McBain, Scene 5: Undercover Showdown

McBain Beating up prisoners didn't get me any clozer to Mendoza. McBain I need to get to him from the inside. McBain It is time for McBain to go undercover. The task is Make McBain Go Undercover McBain MENDOZA!! McBain excessive pyrotechnics and gunfire* McBain Like the slippery eel, he has escaped again, leaving the storyline open for an inevitable sequel. McBain Ve vill meet again, Mendoza. Ve vill meet... again! Director Hold camera. And ... CUT!! That's a wrap everyone. Great scene, Rainier. Wolfcastle This may be the best McBain movie ever. I really feel I stretched my emotional range.

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 1

Template:Tapped Out Kent Brockman Icon This is Kent Brockman, reporting live with the latest on Springfield's first reality TV show. Food vs. Fear vs. Man is edgy and new and not at all a derivative knock-off of some other popular show or shows. Ooh, edgy and new? Sign me up! I'm all about food and fear and m- ok, well, food and fear. The show will be hosted by none other than Springfield's own action icon, Rainier Wolfcastle! (Assuming someone takes it upon themselves to build that primadonna a five-star mansion.) Tune in tonight for more details on Eye on Springfield. The task is Build Wolfcastle's Mansion

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 2

Template:Tapped Out Kent Brockman Icon This new reality show could be a gold mine and there's one news reporter who's going to get in on the ground floor. I've already got tonight's sensationalist headline: Reality TV, Threat, Menace, or Atrocity? The task is Make Brockman Record Eye on Springfield

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 3

There's going to be a-uh lot of money floating around because of this, uh, reality TV show. I'll have to, uh, make sure the production company is aware of all the new film tariffs I am now currently writing into law. Springfield welcomes the entertainment with open palms, er, uh, I mean arms! The task is Make Quimby Collect Bribes

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 4

Ohhhh! Why does that Wolfcastle get to be host? This show was made for a blue collar everyman with questionable self-respect and a generous yet jolly waistline. Wolfcastle Dream on, dough boy. People don't want someone so pathetic it makes them feel better about themselves by comparison. Wolfcastle They want physical conditioning so perfect that it blinds them with shame. Let me show you. The task is Make Wolfcastle Exercise

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 5

Hey, Wolfcastle, just because you're a big time celebrity, don't go thinking you can do whatever you want. Wolfcastle All film crew have been given full cooperation by local politicians, including minor human rights violations. Oh, well, I guess there's not much I can do about that, then, is there? But I'll have my eye on you. The second you step out of line I'll be on you like honey badger on a snake. The task is Make Chief Wiggum Nap in the S.W.A.T. Van

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 6

Template:Tapped Out Kent Brockman Icon ... and that's the end of that story. This is Kent Brockman, reporting. Over to our next story. Wait, why is the teleprompter blank? We still have thirty-seven minutes of air to fill! You can't expect me to just... talk?! I'm a figurehead, I don't create content, I recite it. Get me an interview, someone, anyone, as long as they can get here before the end of the commercial break. The task is Make Wolfcastle Do a Talkshow

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 7

Wolfcastle Vhy is my TV show about loosers vith food phobias? Wolfcastle Vhy are there no guns? No explosions? No mahssive, flexing pectorals? Wolfcastle This pilot needs a hero. It needs . . . Volfcastle. The task is Make Wolfcastle Shoot Action Footage

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 8

Hmmm, it's been two days since the last time I was subjected to the usual battery of wet willies, wedgies, and swirlies. I think having a real live action hero in town has actually caused a downturn in schoolyard oppression. Could this be the turning point I have been waiting for? I think you may be right, Martin, my boy. Today is the day you walk tall with your head held high! The task is Make Martin Try to be Cool

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 9

Good morning, internet. And what news, pray tell, do you have for me this fine afternoon? What's this? "Generic Superhero Series Replaced By Local Reality TV Show"? This is an outrage! "Super Lawyers, Bikers, and 1950's Businessmen" may be the worst kind of shallow, trend-pandering tripe… ...but it's OUR shallow, trend-pandering tripe! The rabid vocal minority must hear of this. To the blogosphere! The task is Make Comic Book Guy Visit the Java Server Wolfcastle The internet is on fire! Vhy do these pasty little nerds hate my show? Lemme tell you something about modern showbusiness, pal. You need an act with chutzpah! You need shock value. Wolfcastle I'll give them shock value! I vill stomp their pitiful series of tubes into the ground! Or... you could just convince some local dope to do something dangerous, disgusting, and/or degrading and catch it on film Just make sure you get a signed release form before you go to air.

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 10

Wolfcastle Vhere can I find a no-life looser to do something stupid for my show? Here at Moe's Tavern, we have a fine selection of morally bankrupt and destitute slobs. Take your pick. Wolfcastle I need someone who vill eat an alarming amount of something disgusting. Ooh! Me! Me, me, me! Pick me! Uh-un, Homer, no more pickled eggs and brine for you until you pay for the last three vats you inhaled. Wolfcastle I choose the little man. Me? I just dropped in for an appletini. I don't even like pickles. The task is Make Wolfcastle Host Live Show at Moe's and Make Smithers Eat Pickled Eggs and Brine at Moe's

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 11

Dad, I need a favor. Whaaa-! I gotta get on Wolfcastle's show. It's been my lifelong dream for almost a day now! Wolf?! Where?! Never mind. Just keep an eye on the kids for me while I go find Mr. Wolfcastle, okay? Wolves? The task is Make Grampa Babysit Bart and Lisa

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 12

Please, Mr. Wolfcastle, please let me be on your show. I'm sure I can do something stupid and dangerous enough to impress your viewers. Just gimme a chance! Wolfcastle I admire your dedication. Your family vill be proud. Please sign this release form. The task is Make Wolfcastle Host Live Show at Police Station and Make Homer Eat The Chief's Famous Guatemalan Insanity Pepper Chili

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 13

Look at all these people making fools of themselves just to get on TV. It's embarrassing. Besides, how could I compete with a guy who can eat a Guatamalan Insanity Pepper? You want to see some disgusting things? Any second-grader in my class could redefine the internet with the right editing and a backbeat. Yeah, kids really are disgusting, aren't they? Hey Ralphie, come over here for a second. Daddy needs your help with something. How would you like to be on TV? The task is Make Ralph Eat a Crayon Sandwich

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 14

Wolfcastle's reality show keeps getting worse and worse, but people can't get enough of its cheap stunts and schadenfreude. It is my nerd-given duty to defend shoddy, indie productions from the evils of mainstream corruption. I may have never seen an episode of "Super Lawyers, Bikers, and 1950's Businessmen", but it deserves to keep its timeslot. You've survived my scathing review blog, Mr. Wolfcastle, but let's see how you deal with... a Pointless Online Petition! The task is Make Comic Book Guy Visit the Java Server

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 15

Template:Tapped Out Kent Brockman Icon Hey, Wolfcastle, your show is in the news again. Someone's started an online petition to boycott. Wolfcastle This is outrageous! How dare this fat nerdlinger insult my TV show?! Wolfcastle I challenge you, fat man, to appear on my show! Or face humiliation before the internet masses! Uh, Rainier, you know he can't hear you yelling at the screen right? Ughn. I felt a disturbance in the force. As if millions of online voices sighed in apathy and suddenly clicked away. A challenge has been issued. How can I ignore it without losing the respect of the forumites? Well played, Wolfcastle, but I will have the last laugh. To the Krusty Burger! The task is Make Wolfcastle Host Live Show at Krusty Burger and Make Comic Book Guy Accept the Challenge at Krusty Burger

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 16

This new reality show is just terrible. How can they justify exploiting people for cheap ratings like this? That's people for you, stab you in the back as soon as they think they can make a few bucks off you. Someone needs to stand up for these people. Some of them are children! Yes, and that child thing was my idea. Equal pay for equal input, I say! The task is Make Marge Protest... Something

Food vs. Fear vs. Man Pt. 15

Wolfcastle "Dear Mr. Volfcastle, Due to rock bottom ratings and minor public outcry, 'Food vs. Fear vs. Man' vill be taken off the air." Wolfcastle This is a tragedy! For the first time ever, the great Rainier Volfcastle is... unemployed. Wolfcastle I guess I must retire to my 15,000 square foot mansion and find comfort by counting my contractual earnings in the company of many beautiful ladies. Wolfcastle sigh The task is Make Wolfcastle Relax in his Mansion

Up Late With McBain

McBain No one is promoting my new movie. I vill revive my old talk show and show them how it is done. McBain The new "Up Late with McBain" vill change the landscape of late night TV forever. McBain I'll use the set of McBain: Let's Get Silly and leverage my background in zany comedy. McBain If Hollywood has taught me anything, it's that shoehorned comedy makes everything better. McBain ...that's the joke. The task is Make McBain Host Up Late With McBain

See also

• The Simpsons: Tapped Out
• The Simpsons: Tapped Out content updates

References

The Simpsons: Tapped Out
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