Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em
Template:Infobox Simpsons episode
Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em... is the third episode of the eighteenth season of The Simpsons. It aired on September 24, 2006.
Synopsis
Opening Credits: Blackboard joke: None Couch gag: Ralph Wiggum wanders into the Simpson living room, where a vending machine is full of assorted The Simpsons characters. Ralph selects a Homer character from the machine and bites the head off, as if it is a piece of candy.
Act One: The Simpson family visits the, now run down and dilapidated, Springfield Mall for some shopping. The mall is nearly empty and the stores that still remain in the mall, are either under stocked or abandoned. Bart visits a video arcade with beat up old arcade games from the 1980’s. He plays Triangle Wars, which is a parody of the old Asteroids arcade game. Homer pays a visit to a candy store and despite the advisement of the store clerk, Homer purchases some gummy worms that have been around for years. Marge and Homer visit a used book store, and Homer happens across The Time Life Carpenter’s Library. Homer shows interest in the “how to” books and Marge encourages him to buy them.
Back at home, Bart relaxes in the kitchen, while Marge opens a letter from school. The note is to inform all the parents that someone at the school has a peanut allergy and that peanuts will no longer be allowed at school. In the living room, Homer watches some stock car racing and Marge tries to encourage him to build something with his new “how to” books. She grumbles though, as the lazy Homer explains that he is using them, as a footrest. Upstairs in her room, Marge puts some laundry away; she steps on a loose floor board that flips up and tips over her nightstand, breaking it. Marge suddenly gets an idea, as she sees one of Homer’s “how to” books, featuring floorboards and nightstands, lying on his nightstand. Later, Marge sports some overalls and some tools, as she fixes the loose floorboard and her nightstand, with the help of Homer’s “how to” book. Marge receives a feeling accomplishment and decides to learn some more carpentry, as a short montage shows her building a fancy birdhouse, mailbox, greeting sign, and doghouse. Bart and Lisa are amazed at Marge’s handyman skills and Lisa suggests to Marge that she try and earn some money with her new knowledge of carpentry.
Marge puts out a flyer, featuring the name of her new company “Simpson Carpentry.” Superintendent Chalmers responds to the flyer and inquires about his damaged bookcase that is in need of repair. But when Marge shows up at his door to fix his bookcase, he is shocked at the idea of a woman carpenter and suddenly changes his mind. Marge also shows up at Krusty the Klown’s doorstep, but he offers the same reaction as Superintendent Chalmers; citing that women can’t be carpenters. That night in bed, Marge voices her frustrations to Homer; she comments aloud, that maybe people expect carpenters to be fat guys with their butt cracks showing. As she looks over at Homer, who is already sleeping, Marge suddenly gets an idea, when she sees his butt crack peeking out of his pajamas. The next day, Professor Frink inquires about the installation of a doggie door at his home, and Homer arrives at his doorstep with a giant red tool chest on wheels. Professor Frink informs Homer of the doggie door, and when he goes back inside, Marge sneaks out of the tool chest to do the work. Marge is happy to see her plan is successful.
Act Two: Marge’s successful carpentry service continues, as she builds Kent Brockman a gazebo in his back yard. When Kent comes out to inspect the finished product, Marge quickly hides in the tool chest. Kent is impressed with the gazebo and Homer asks Kent what he would say if he found out that the gazebo was built by a woman. Kent responds by saying that if that were true he would tear the gazebo down.
At school, Groundskeeper Willie performs searches for peanut products before allowing the students into the school. An impatient Bart grumbles aloud about how he doesn’t think it is fair that the entire school has to give up peanuts just for one kid. As Willie searches Bart’s backpack, Bart tricks Willie into telling him that Principal Skinner is the one who has the peanut allergy. Later, Bart spies on Skinner and Willie in the Principal’s office, as Skinner informs Willie to make sure to keep even the tiniest peanut crumb away, or his throat will close up as fast as, “A museum at 4:45.”
At the Builder’s Barn, Marge picks up some more carpentry supplies and she is stopped by Helen Lovejoy, and Lindsay Naegle. The two women ask Marge if she is out buying supplies for Homer, and Marge replies, telling them that she helps Homer out more than people think. The two women just laugh at Marge alluding to the fact that women can’t be carpenters, and Marge struggles to keep her temper. That night at home, Homer accepts another carpentry job and hands the phone off to Marge, who acts his secretary, “Shirley.” A disgruntled Marge makes the appointment with the customer and angrily hangs up the phone. Marge shares her feelings with Homer, telling him that he takes too much off the credit and that she wishes she could take the rightful credit for her work. Homer counters by telling Marge that they can’t tell anyone that she does the work, because he would be humiliated in front of the whole town.
The next day at school, Bart removes the school trophies from the trophy case, sets them up as bowling pins and knocks them down with Homer’s bowling ball. Principal Skinner catches Bart in the act, and orders him to detention. A confident and cocky Bart brushes off Skinner’s order, and turns the tables on the Principal, by wielding a stick with a peanut tied to the end of it. Skinner instantly is at Bart’s mercy; a short montage shows Bart wielding his “peanut stick” while forcing Skinner to write “A baby beat me up” repeatedly on the blackboard; Bart forces Skinner to stand in place as he fires tennis balls and beer cans at Skinner; and Bart forces Skinner to read an embarrassing announcement over the school P.A. system.
The carpentry business continues, as Marge builds a windmill for Lenny, while Homer eats potato chips and watches. When Lenny and Carl come out to see the windmill, Marge is forced to quickly hide in the tool chest, while Homer takes the credit for her work. Later at home, Marge is fed up with Homer taking all the credit all the time and decides to quit the carpentry business. Homer tells Marge she can’t quit, because Mayor Quimby has commissioned him to repair Springfield’s old wooden roller coaster, The Zoominator. This only angers Marge more and she storms off, telling Homer that he will have to repair The Zoominator himself. Meanwhile, outside Bart forces Skinner to fill his pants with cats and lit firecrackers.
Act Three: The next day at the worksite for The Zoominator, Homer tries to fake his way through being a foreman in front of his newly hired construction crew. When Homer realizes he doesn’t know what to do, he hides in the giant tool chest and cries aloud. He wonders aloud about what he is going to do, especially since he promised to pay the men $50,000 for their work, with money he doesn’t have. When Homer’s crew hear that they aren’t going to be paid, they decide to walk off the worksite and Homer is left alone is his tool chest.
Principal Skinner has a nightmare in which Mr. Peanut, the spokesmen for Planter’s peanuts, attacks him. Skinner wakes up from his nightmare only to discover Bart at the foot of his bed. Bart dumps some garbage on Skinner’s bed and orders him to eat it, while threatening Skinner with the “peanut stick.” Later, Bart continues to wield his “peanut stick” and forces Skinner to go into Comic Book Guy’s store and embarrass himself by requesting to breastfeed a Bilbo Baggins doll. Comic Book Guy conveys to Skinner that Bart has found his Kryptonite and when Skinner fails to grasp the concept, Comic Book Guy tells Skinner to simply find Bart’s weakness and defend himself with it. That night at the hospital, Skinner sneaks into Dr. Hibbert’s office and searches for Bart’s medical file. Skinner announces to himself that he will have his revenge, as he discovers Bart’s allergen.
In the Simpson kitchen, Homer works on his rollercoaster project, by building a scaled down model. However, when Homer tests out the model, it quickly bursts into flames. Lisa enters the room and suggests to Homer, that maybe if he would give Marge her due credit, she might help him out with the rollercoaster project. Homer counters by telling Lisa that if he can repair the rollercoaster himself, then all the lies he told about taking the credit for Marge’s work could be true.
The next morning at school, Bart waltzes into Skinner’s office with a hatful of maggots. But before Bart can even tell Skinner what he has to do with the maggots, Skinner flings the hat of maggots away and reveals his own stick with Bart’s allergen, shrimp, tied to the end of it. A parody of the Lightsaber battle scene between Obi-Wan Kenobi and Darth Vader from Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith ensues. Bart and Skinner clash with their respective “sticks” while furious Star Wars music plays in the background. Bart and Skinner battle down the hallway, out a window and onto the top of a school bus that pulls away from the school. As they continue to battle on top of the moving school bus they enter the “Little Bangkok” section of Springfield; an oncoming sign forces them to jump off the school bus and into a Thai food factory. The two continue to battle on a rickety catwalk, suspended over giant vat of peanut shrimp, when suddenly the catwalk gives way and they both fall into the giant vat. Both Bart and Skinner’s allergies instantly act up, as their faces puff and swell.
Meanwhile, Homer stands in front of a crowd, gathered to witness the unveiling of the refurbished rollercoaster. Marge has a video camera at the ready, so she can catch Homer being exposed as a fraud on tape. Homer pulls down a drape covering The Zoominator and the crowd is in awe, at the seemingly repaired rollercoaster. But when Homer pops the cork off a champagne bottle to celebrate, the cork strikes the fragile roller coaster and causes a chain reaction of screws, planks and rails on the roller coaster to suddenly loosen. The crowd is shocked at the sight of the once again rundown rollercoaster, and Lisa calls out to Homer, telling him to come forth with the truth. But, Homer wants still wants a chance to amaze the crowd with his handyman skills and decides to prove that the roller coaster is fine, by riding on it himself. Homer quickly jumps into the train of cars and flips the switch on the roller coaster. As he ascends up the first hill, Marge gasps as she notices three large gaps in the track. Marge quickly dons on a tool belt and rushes to repair the broken sections of the track just before Homer rolls over them. While still coasting around the ride, Homer thanks Marge for saving his life and informs the crowd that Marge deserves all the credit for all the work that he took credit for. The crowd applauses, as the coaster comes to a stop at the beginning, and just as Marge is about to tell Homer that she loves him, the entire rollercoaster structure comes crashing down on top of him.
At the hospital, Marge visits with Homer, who is okay, but immobilized in a full body cast. Bart and Skinner rest in their respective hospital beds in the same room as Homer, and as the Star Wars music begins once again, the two commence throwing shrimp and peanuts at each other.
End Credits: The normal Simpson theme plays as the credits roll over a black background.
Cultural references
- The title of the episode is a play on MC Hammer's 1990 album Please Hammer Don't Hurt 'Em.
- Inside the bookstore at the Springfield Mall, a book titled "I, Scoundrel" can be seen. This is a spoof of I, Robot, which is a collection of science fiction short stories, authored by Issac Asimov.
- The bookstore in the Springfield Mall is named, "Rock Bottom Remainders." There is also a musical band of the same name. The band is made up of famous published writers such as, Stephen King, Dave Barry and The Simpsons creator, Matt Groening
- The plot for this episode follows the set-up of the popular 1980's television show, Remington Steele: A talented woman hires a man to be the figurehead for her company, because she can't get anyone to trust a female in her profession.
- The music played during Bart and Principal Skinner’s stick fight is called, "Duel of the Fates," composed by John Williams. It is used a number of times in episode 1-3 of the Star Wars franchise.
Trivia
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- The Video games at “Captain Blip’s Zapateria" are:
- Click Clack (Dig-Dug)
- Unipede (Centipede)
- Remington Steele: The Game
- Rocky III vs. Clara Peller
- Space-Tac-Toe
- Devil's Advocate
- Monkey Kong
- Polybius
- Triangle Wars (Asteroids)
- The bookstore at the mall is called Rock Bottom Remainders, which is also the name of a band composed of famous authors, including Simpsons creator Matt Groening.
- The vending machine in the couch gag contains 3 rows of characters. First row: Homer-C5, Marge-G9, Maggie-A2, Lisa-B3, Bart-C4. Second row: Moe-D5, Lenny-B7, Carl-J7, Patty-F6, Apu-A3. Third row: Mr. Burns-J10, Smithers-B5, Nelson-C1, Mrs. Krabappel-F7, Krusty the Clown-B9.
- Stores seen in the Springfield Mall: 1987 Calendars!!!, Yesterday's Puppies (Pet Store), Dukakis Campaign H.Q., Captain Blip's Zapateria (Arcade), and Rock Bottom Remainders (Bookstore).
- Books spotted in the Rock Bottom Remainders bookstore at the Springfield Mall: Wisconsin From Above, Veterans' Day Parades, Smiles of Ireland, The Kansas City Royals: Forever Champions, Drink Your Own Blood and Save, and The Time-Life Carpenter's Library.
- Video arcade games seen inside Captain Blip's Zapateria at the Springfield Mall: Click Clack, Unipede, Remington Steele: The Game, Rocky III vs. Clara Peller, Devil's Advocate, Triangle Wars, Polybius, Space-Tac-Toe, and Monkey Kong.
- In this episode, it is revealed that Principal Skinner is allergic to peanuts, Bart is allergic to shrimp, and Milhouse is allergic to his own tears.
- The book "The How, Why, and Huh? Book of Weather" appears on a bookcase in the background of the Rock Bottom Remainders bookstore. Lisa consulted this book in "Hurricane Neddy" to discover that a hurricane was heading for Springfield. Other books for sale in this store include "Drink Your Own Blood and Save!" (recommended by Oprah Winfrey) and "The Kansas City Royals: Forever Champions".
- Marge crafted out The Simpsons 20th Century Fox logo and the famous American homeFallingwater]] designed by Frank Lloyd Wright, appearing as a mail box.
- Skinner and Mr. Muntz share an affliction.
- While Homer is riding the rollercoaster, he is wearing white gloves, but in some of the shots he can be seen without them, also while Homer is riding from left-to-right, the Zoominator logo is reversed, meaning that the drawing was finished for right-to-left use and simply mirrored for left-to-right use.
Goofs
- Bart in allergic to shrimp in this episode, despite the fact that he was able to eat shrimp in episode 16-7, "Mommie Beerest."
Broadcasting information
- 1st Airdate: Sunday, September 24, 2006, with 9.72 million viewers tuning in.
- 1st Airdate: Sunday, November 5, 2006
