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Difference between revisions of "The Joy of Sect/Quotes"

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
< The Joy of Sect
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{{TabQ
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{{TabQ}}
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|episode = The Joy of Sect
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Bart Carny|Das Bus}}
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Homer: Homer no function beer well without.
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{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Thanks for lettin' me skip school to see the team come back from the championship, Dad.
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[[Category:Quotes]]
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{{qf|[[Homer]]}} I always say, a boy can learn more at an airport than he can at any school.
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----
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{{qf|{{ap|Jane|The Joy of Sect}}}} We're having a free get-acquainted session at our resort this weekend.
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{{qf|Homer}} How much is this free resort weekend?
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{{qf|[[Glen]]}} It's free.
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{{qf|Homer}} And when is this weekend?
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{{qf|Glen}} It's this weekend.
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{{qf|Homer}} Uh huh. And how much does it cost?
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{{qf|Glen}} Um, it's free.
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{{qf|Homer}} I see. And when is it?
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{{qf|Glen}} It's this weekend.
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{{qf|Homer}} And what are you charging for this free weekend?
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----
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{{qf|[[Marge]]}} But what if they try to talk us into something?
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{{qf|Homer}} Marge, Marge, Marge. Remember when those smooth-talking guys tried to sell me a time-share vacation condo?
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{{qf|Marge}} You bought four of them. Thank God the check bounced.
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{{qf|Homer}} So, I beat the system.
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----
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{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Watch yourself, Dad. You're the highly suggestible type.
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{{qf|Homer}} Yes. I am the highly suggestible type.
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----
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{{qf|Jane}} It certainly is a beautiful day. We should thank the Leader.
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{{qf|Homer}} Who the hell is that? Some kind of leader?
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----
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{{qf|Glen}} Beer is not allowed.
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{{qf|Homer}} Homer no function beer well without.
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{{qf|Jane}} Would you rather have beer or complete and utter contentment?
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{{qf|Homer}} What kind of beer?
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----
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{{qf|Homer}} Wait - I'm confused about the movie. So the cops knew that internal affairs was setting them up?
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{{qf|Glen}} What are you talking about? There's nothing like that in there.
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{{qf|Homer}} Well, you see, when I get bored, I make up my own movie. I have a very short attention span
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{{qf|[[Kent Brockman]]}} Springfield has been overrun by a strange and almost certainly evil sect calling themselves the Movementarians. In exchange for your home and all your money, the Leader of this "way-out" and wrong religion, claims he'll take believers away on his spaceship to the planet Blisstonia. Excuse my editorial laugh. But... ''[gets news]'' Ladies and gentlemen, I've just learned of a change in this station's management. Welcome, Movementarians! Continue to improve our lives! I love you, Perfect Leader. And new C.E.O. of K-B-B-O broadcasting!
 +
----
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{{qf|Homer}} See, Marge? Our lives are so much better now
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{{qf|Glen}} ''[over P.A.]'' You two! Stop talking and resume the lima bean harvest!
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{{qf|Marge}} When we got married, you promised me my harvesting days were over.
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----
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{{qf|Marge}} Now, how are we going to get my Homie back?
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{{qf|[[Groundskeeper Willie]]}} I'll kidnap him for fifty. De-program him for a hundred. And I'll kill him for five hundred.
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{{qf|Marge}} No, no, no. Just the first two.
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{{qf|Willie}} All right. I'll throw in the killin' for free.
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----
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{{qf|Marge}} All right, already! But do you love the Leader more than having your very own, brand new—Hoverbikes? What do you have to say about the Leader now? Hunh? Hunh?
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{{qf|Bart and Lisa}} The hell with him! What Leader? He can take a flying leap as far as I'm concerned! Lea-who?
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{{qf|Marge}} And who do you love now?
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{{qf|Bart and Lisa}} Hoverbikes!!
 +
 
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{{Season 9|Q}}
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{{DEFAULTSORT:Joy of Sect/Quotes}}

Latest revision as of 14:57, April 3, 2024


Season 9 Episode Quotes
← 190 "Bart Carny"
191
"The Joy of Sect"
"Das Bus" 192 →


Bart: Thanks for lettin' me skip school to see the team come back from the championship, Dad.
Homer: I always say, a boy can learn more at an airport than he can at any school.
Jane: We're having a free get-acquainted session at our resort this weekend.
Homer: How much is this free resort weekend?
Glen: It's free.
Homer: And when is this weekend?
Glen: It's this weekend.
Homer: Uh huh. And how much does it cost?
Glen: Um, it's free.
Homer: I see. And when is it?
Glen: It's this weekend.
Homer: And what are you charging for this free weekend?
Marge: But what if they try to talk us into something?
Homer: Marge, Marge, Marge. Remember when those smooth-talking guys tried to sell me a time-share vacation condo?
Marge: You bought four of them. Thank God the check bounced.
Homer: So, I beat the system.
Lisa: Watch yourself, Dad. You're the highly suggestible type.
Homer: Yes. I am the highly suggestible type.
Jane: It certainly is a beautiful day. We should thank the Leader.
Homer: Who the hell is that? Some kind of leader?
Glen: Beer is not allowed.
Homer: Homer no function beer well without.
Jane: Would you rather have beer or complete and utter contentment?
Homer: What kind of beer?
Homer: Wait - I'm confused about the movie. So the cops knew that internal affairs was setting them up?
Glen: What are you talking about? There's nothing like that in there.
Homer: Well, you see, when I get bored, I make up my own movie. I have a very short attention span
Kent Brockman: Springfield has been overrun by a strange and almost certainly evil sect calling themselves the Movementarians. In exchange for your home and all your money, the Leader of this "way-out" and wrong religion, claims he'll take believers away on his spaceship to the planet Blisstonia. Excuse my editorial laugh. But... [gets news] Ladies and gentlemen, I've just learned of a change in this station's management. Welcome, Movementarians! Continue to improve our lives! I love you, Perfect Leader. And new C.E.O. of K-B-B-O broadcasting!
Homer: See, Marge? Our lives are so much better now
Glen: [over P.A.] You two! Stop talking and resume the lima bean harvest!
Marge: When we got married, you promised me my harvesting days were over.
Marge: Now, how are we going to get my Homie back?
Groundskeeper Willie: I'll kidnap him for fifty. De-program him for a hundred. And I'll kill him for five hundred.
Marge: No, no, no. Just the first two.
Willie: All right. I'll throw in the killin' for free.
Marge: All right, already! But do you love the Leader more than having your very own, brand new—Hoverbikes? What do you have to say about the Leader now? Hunh? Hunh?
Bart and Lisa: The hell with him! What Leader? He can take a flying leap as far as I'm concerned! Lea-who?
Marge: And who do you love now?
Bart and Lisa: Hoverbikes!!
Season 9 Quotes
The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson • The Principal and the Pauper • Lisa's Sax • Treehouse of Horror VIII • The Cartridge Family • Bart Star • The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons • Lisa the Skeptic • Realty Bites • Miracle on Evergreen Terrace • All Singing, All Dancing • Bart Carny • The Joy of Sect • Das Bus • The Last Temptation of Krust • Dumbbell Indemnity • Lisa the Simpson • This Little Wiggy • Simpson Tide • The Trouble with Trillions • Girly Edition • Trash of the Titans • King of the Hill • Lost Our Lisa • Natural Born Kissers
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