Difference between revisions of "Military Antiques (Tapped Out quest)"

Latest revision as of 11:17, May 11, 2024

For the store, see Herman's Military Antiques.

Military Antiques is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Level 30 content update. It unlocks Herman and Herman's Military Antiques.

Dialogue[edit]

Pt. 1[edit]

After tapping on Marge's exclamation mark Lisa, I would never criticize your town-building skills, but I've been to all these stores a zillion times. A shopper needs variety! Well, I was thinking we could rebuild Herman's shop. But I don't think you'd shop there. It sells military antiques. A store's a store. Build it! Build it now! Task: "Build the Herman's Military Antiques". Build: Herman's Military Antiques New Character: Herman Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 2[edit]

After tapping on Herman's exclamation mark They say when you go over to the other side, you come back changed. Unfortunately, I remain exactly the same. Task: "Make Herman Run the Antique Shop". The task takes place at Herman's Military Antiques and takes 8 hours. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 3[edit]

After tapping on Wiggum's exclamation mark I'd like to purchase this AK-47, please. Will you need to run a background check on me? Of course not. That would infringe on your Constitutional right to never be inconvenienced -- even in the tiniest, most reasonable way -- when guns are involved. It's all part of "Gun Buyers Are To Be Hailed As Our Worthiest Heroes" Act of 2013... sponsored by the NRA. Great! The ready availability of guns to the public makes my job as a cop safer AND easier. Task: "Make Wiggum Read NRA Pamphlets". The task takes place at Herman's Military Antiques and takes 24 hours. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 4[edit]

After tapping on Wiggum's exclamation mark Apu, give me a Squishee, beef jerky, and an advanced assault rifle-type weapons platform with integrated laser range finder and grenade launcher. Something experimental like Tony Stark wishes he had. We don't stock guns, you overweight imbecile. You do realize it's now illegal to operate a store that doesn't sell firearms? It's all part of the "How Else May We Serve, Oh Wise and Powerful NRA?" Act. You're going to jail! Task: "Make Apu Serve Time". The task takes place at Springfield Penitentiary and takes 24 hours. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 5[edit]

After tapping on Marge's exclamation mark Why are all of Springfield's stores shutting down! There's nowhere to shop! Sorry Marge, that's the law. I have to defend the people's right to buy guns whenever the whim strikes them. What about MY Constitutional rights to a decent downtown, fun window shopping, and jeans at a variety of price points? Those aren't rights! Or are they? Who can say! That's the funny thing about the law -- you never have the slightest clue what it is. Well, I'm taking my message to the people! Task: "Make Marge Protest... Something". The task takes 24 hours. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 6[edit]

After tapping on Marge's exclamation mark We need to organize to protest these terrible laws that are shutting down our God-given stores. Herman, are you in? That's affirmative. It's time we took our government back. That's what democracy is all about, right? Right. Now let's mount an armed frontal assault on City Hall. Democracy-style. Uh... come again? Task: "Make Herman Draft Battle Plans". The task takes place at Bart's Treehouse and takes 4 hours. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 7[edit]

After tapping on Herman's exclamation mark The battle plans are ready, Marge. You say the word, and we take back City Hall! Geez, I'm reading over these plans, and there's an awful lot of shooting and yelling and reconnoitering. It all sounds very violent. To the lay person, it probably does. But when you're staging a blood-drenched coup, violence really helps keep up morale. It's something the whole battalion can have fun doing together. Why not lose a pincer movement or two, and let's see if we can overthrow the state without all the fisticuffs? Task: "Make Herman Draft Battle Plans". The task takes place at Bart's Treehouse and takes 4 hours. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 8[edit]

After tapping on Herman's exclamation mark The new battle plans are drawn. If all goes according to plan, not a single shot will be fired. But be warned: there WILL be mild swearing, intermittent sneaking around, and a post-operation cleanup where everybody -- and I mean EVERYBODY -- pitches in, leaving City Hall just as tidy as they found it. If that sounds like more than you can stomach, best stay home, soldier! Much better. Let's prepare for "battle!" Tasks: "Place a Training Dummy" and "Make Herman Train for Battle". The task takes place at a Training Dummy and takes 60 minutes. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 9[edit]

After tapping on Herman's exclamation mark Attack City Hall! Storm the gates! Wipe your feet on the mat before entering! Pause to admire the mural in the lobby -- it's from the 1920's! And remember to be nice to the receptionists! They have a hard job! We're doing it, Marge! We're taking back our government. Shhh! No shouting inside City Hall. People are trying to work. Attack quietly or not at all! Tasks: "Make Herman Stage a Coup" and "Make Marge Stage a Coup". The tasks take place at the Town Hall and take 24 hours. What is the meaning of this? Who is this rabble sitting patiently in my waiting area? It's a coup. We're tired of government walking all over the people, so we're taking back City Hall! We're not going to put up with limited shopping options, crazy pro-gun laws, a mob armed with blunderbusses, thinly-premised Wolfcastle films, and... and... What exactly ARE we trying to accomplish? Honestly, I've forgotten. I guess this whole story didn't make much sense. You know, we never thought anyone would play long enough to get to level 30. Guys, maybe this is a good thing. A real wake up call for everyone involved with this game. I mean, come on. Herman? THAT'S the best character we have to add? No offense, Herm. Even I know it's true. Let's get back to the drawing board, and get to work on a level 31 that'll really knock everyone's socks off! Sorry about level 30, guys. If you promise not to gripe to EA too much, everybody can have three donuts. Quest reward: 3 and 10