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"The Ziff Who Came to Dinner"
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| "The Ziff Who Came to Dinner"
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| Episode Information
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"The Ziff Who Came to Dinner" is the 14th episode of The Simpsons' fifteenth season. It originally aired on March 14, 2004.
Synopsis
Marge's old prom date Artie Ziff returns to Springfield, having lost his money and his Internet business, and asks to stay with the Simpsons until he gets back on his feet. What Artie doesn't tell them is that he's also a fugitive from justice, sought by the SEC for cheating his stockholders.
Plot
Homer takes Bart, Lisa, and Rod and Todd Flanders to see the movie The Re-Deadening, as a result of meeting Lenny Leonard at the ticket booth and learning he has a speaking part. As a result, Bart and Lisa are scared when they go to bed and then they hear a noise from the attic. Going up into the attic, Lisa and Bart search, but succumbing to their fear, the pair run down the ladder. Homer and Marge go up the ladder, and see Marge's high-school beau, Artie Ziff living there. Artie explains that he was living in the attic due to an unsuccessful internet business, Ziffcorp, and lost all his money after spending it on many extravagant items which then got repossessed. He came to the family's house because Artie believed that Marge was the closest thing to him, despite the incident at the prom. Artie says to the Simpsons that he will stay in their house until he gets back on his feet, and promises that he will be on his best behavior.
Marge sees on the news that the Securities & Exchange Commission is looking for Artie Ziff. Meanwhile, Artie is playing poker with Homer and his friends. Homer wins 98% of his company's outstanding stock and Artie's peanuts. The SEC then bust in to arrest Ziff, but Homer says he owns 230 million shares of ZiffCorp, making him the majority stockholder. To protect himself, Artie has Homer take the blame. Homer is arrested by SEC, and put on trial.
When Homer is on trial (making a complete ass of himself due to him failing to understand the Fifth Amendment, and thus rendered completely incapable of pleading the fifth amendment.), Marge blames Artie for Homer being on trial and that this is the reason why nobody likes him, because he only thinks of himself. Homer is then found guilty and sentenced to ten years in prison. After Homer is sentenced, Marge kicks Artie out of the house, telling him that she never wants to see him again. Going to Moe's Tavern, Artie encounters Patty and Selma, who originally had a crush on him in 1974. Selma asks Artie to come to their apartment, after he mentions that he put Homer in prison. As they spend the night together, Artie makes a plan to turn over his corporate books in order to admit he is the real criminal. Artie turns himself in, and Homer is subsequently released. The family takes one last look at their "Uncle Artie," who is annoying prisoners by putting out their cigarettes with a squirt bottle.
