Difference between revisions of "The Springfield Files/Quotes"
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:'''[[Squeaky-voiced teen]]''': I'm Leonard Nimoy, goodnight, and keep watching the skis! ... I mean, skies. | :'''[[Squeaky-voiced teen]]''': I'm Leonard Nimoy, goodnight, and keep watching the skis! ... I mean, skies. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :'''Mulder''': Look at this Scully. There's been another unsubstantiated UFO sighting in the heartland of America. We've got to get there right away. | + | :'''[[Mulder]]''': Look at this Scully. There's been another unsubstantiated UFO sighting in the heartland of America. We've got to get there right away. |
| − | :'''Scully''': Well, gee Mulder. There's also this report of a shipment of drugs and illegal weapons coming into New Jersey tonight. | + | :'''[[Scully]]''': Well, gee Mulder. There's also this report of a shipment of drugs and illegal weapons coming into New Jersey tonight. |
:'''Mulder''': I hardly think the FBI is concerned with matters like that. | :'''Mulder''': I hardly think the FBI is concerned with matters like that. | ||
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:'''Mr. Burns''': So, another Friday is upon us. What will you be doing, Smithers? Something gay, no doubt! | :'''Mr. Burns''': So, another Friday is upon us. What will you be doing, Smithers? Something gay, no doubt! | ||
| − | :'''Smithers''': Wha...? What?! | + | :'''[[Smithers]]''': Wha...? What?! |
:'''Mr. Burns''': You know. Light-hearted, fancy-free. "Mothers, lock up your daughters! Smithers is on the town!" ''[chuckles]'' | :'''Mr. Burns''': You know. Light-hearted, fancy-free. "Mothers, lock up your daughters! Smithers is on the town!" ''[chuckles]'' | ||
:'''Smithers''': Exactly sir! ''[laughs nervously]'' | :'''Smithers''': Exactly sir! ''[laughs nervously]'' | ||
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:'''[[Mrs. Glick]]''': It's Friday. | :'''[[Mrs. Glick]]''': It's Friday. | ||
:'''Jasper''': Uh-oh. Wrong pills. | :'''Jasper''': Uh-oh. Wrong pills. | ||
| − | + | :''[Hair grows all over Jasper's body, as Mrs. Glick watches on.]'' | |
| − | : | + | :'''Jasper''': ...Little help? |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :'''Homer''': Well, it's | + | :'''Homer''': Well, it's 1 AM. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids. |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :'''Marge''': Homer, it's 2 | + | :'''[[Marge]]''': Homer, it's 2 AM. What happened? |
:'''Homer''': It was an alien, Marge! It appeared in front of me and said "Don't be Afraid." | :'''Homer''': It was an alien, Marge! It appeared in front of me and said "Don't be Afraid." | ||
:'''Marge''': Have you been drinking? | :'''Marge''': Have you been drinking? | ||
| − | :'''Homer''': No! | + | :'''Homer''': No! ''[pause]'' Well, ten beers. |
| − | |||
| − | |||
---- | ---- | ||
:''[Moulder and Scully watch Homer run on a tread-mill.]'' | :''[Moulder and Scully watch Homer run on a tread-mill.]'' | ||
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:'''Scully''': No point. I just thought he could stand to lose a little weight. | :'''Scully''': No point. I just thought he could stand to lose a little weight. | ||
:'''Mulder''': His jiggling is almost hypnotic. | :'''Mulder''': His jiggling is almost hypnotic. | ||
| − | :'''Scully''': ''[ | + | :'''Scully''': ''[in a trance]'' Yes. It's like a lava lamp. |
---- | ---- | ||
:'''Homer''': Please! Don't hurt me! | :'''Homer''': Please! Don't hurt me! | ||
:'''[[Burns' alien|Alien]]''': ''[Gentle voice]'' Don't be afraid. | :'''[[Burns' alien|Alien]]''': ''[Gentle voice]'' Don't be afraid. | ||
:'''Homer''': Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!! | :'''Homer''': Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!! | ||
| − | + | :''[Begins running through the field of grass, creating a handwritten writing of "Yahhh!" in the grass.]'' | |
---- | ---- | ||
:'''Homer''': I'm telling you, I saw a creature from another planet. | :'''Homer''': I'm telling you, I saw a creature from another planet. | ||
| − | :'''Lisa''': Maybe you just dreamed it. | + | :'''[[Lisa]]''': Maybe you just dreamed it. |
:'''Homer''': Oh yeah? Well, when I came to, I was covered with a sticky, translucent goo. Explain that! | :'''Homer''': Oh yeah? Well, when I came to, I was covered with a sticky, translucent goo. Explain that! | ||
:'''Marge''': ''[Serves him]'' More sausage? | :'''Marge''': ''[Serves him]'' More sausage? | ||
| − | + | :''[Homer starts drooling.]'' | |
---- | ---- | ||
:'''Lisa''': Dad, according to "Junior Skeptic Magazine," the chances are 175 million to one of another form of life actually coming in contact with ours. | :'''Lisa''': Dad, according to "Junior Skeptic Magazine," the chances are 175 million to one of another form of life actually coming in contact with ours. | ||
:'''Homer''': So? | :'''Homer''': So? | ||
:'''Lisa''': It's just that the people who claim they've seen aliens are always pathetic low-lifes with boring jobs. Oh, and you, Dad. ''[nervous laugh]'' | :'''Lisa''': It's just that the people who claim they've seen aliens are always pathetic low-lifes with boring jobs. Oh, and you, Dad. ''[nervous laugh]'' | ||
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{{Season 8|Q}} | {{Season 8|Q}} | ||
{{DEFAULTSORT:Springfield Files/Quotes}} | {{DEFAULTSORT:Springfield Files/Quotes}} | ||
Revision as of 07:08, December 29, 2018
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- Bart: [telling a scary story] ...and that's how much money college will cost for Maggie.
- Homer: No... no... NOOOOOOOOOOO!
- Mr. Burns: La la, la la la la [skips off into the woods]
- Dr. Nick: The most rewarding part was when he gave me my money.
- Mr Burns: Yes, and now that I'm back to normal I don't bring you peace and love I bring you hate and...
- Dr Nick: Time for a booster! (Jabs needle in Burns)
- Mr Burns: Good morning starshine, the earth says hello...
- Squeaky-voiced teen: I'm Leonard Nimoy, goodnight, and keep watching the skis! ... I mean, skies.
- Mulder: Look at this Scully. There's been another unsubstantiated UFO sighting in the heartland of America. We've got to get there right away.
- Scully: Well, gee Mulder. There's also this report of a shipment of drugs and illegal weapons coming into New Jersey tonight.
- Mulder: I hardly think the FBI is concerned with matters like that.
- Homer: I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to speed around the city, keeping its speed over fifty. And if its speed dropped, the bus would explode! I think it was called... "The bus that couldn't slow down."
- Mr. Burns: So, another Friday is upon us. What will you be doing, Smithers? Something gay, no doubt!
- Smithers: Wha...? What?!
- Mr. Burns: You know. Light-hearted, fancy-free. "Mothers, lock up your daughters! Smithers is on the town!" [chuckles]
- Smithers: Exactly sir! [laughs nervously]
- Jasper: Thank God it's Wednesday. [swallows pills]
- Mrs. Glick: It's Friday.
- Jasper: Uh-oh. Wrong pills.
- [Hair grows all over Jasper's body, as Mrs. Glick watches on.]
- Jasper: ...Little help?
- Homer: Well, it's 1 AM. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.
- Marge: Homer, it's 2 AM. What happened?
- Homer: It was an alien, Marge! It appeared in front of me and said "Don't be Afraid."
- Marge: Have you been drinking?
- Homer: No! [pause] Well, ten beers.
- [Moulder and Scully watch Homer run on a tread-mill.]
- Moulder: Wait a minute, Scully. What's the point of this test?
- Scully: No point. I just thought he could stand to lose a little weight.
- Mulder: His jiggling is almost hypnotic.
- Scully: [in a trance] Yes. It's like a lava lamp.
- Homer: Please! Don't hurt me!
- Alien: [Gentle voice] Don't be afraid.
- Homer: Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!
- [Begins running through the field of grass, creating a handwritten writing of "Yahhh!" in the grass.]
- Homer: I'm telling you, I saw a creature from another planet.
- Lisa: Maybe you just dreamed it.
- Homer: Oh yeah? Well, when I came to, I was covered with a sticky, translucent goo. Explain that!
- Marge: [Serves him] More sausage?
- [Homer starts drooling.]
- Lisa: Dad, according to "Junior Skeptic Magazine," the chances are 175 million to one of another form of life actually coming in contact with ours.
- Homer: So?
- Lisa: It's just that the people who claim they've seen aliens are always pathetic low-lifes with boring jobs. Oh, and you, Dad. [nervous laugh]
