Difference between revisions of "The Itchy-Est Place on Earth"

Latest revision as of 18:42, December 5, 2024

The Itchy-Est Place on Earth is an event-exclusive questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Itchy & Scratchy Land content update.

Dialogue[edit]

Pt. 1[edit]

After having Krustyland nuked Mr. Meyers, this town desperately needs an amusement park. You literally JUST blew up your last one with a hydrogen bomb. I have no memory of that. Anyway, we think Itchy and Scratchy would make a wonderful theme. We'll give you prime real estate, and free labor from my easily-exploited constituents. There's no way the voters would be dumb enough to approve this plan. *laughs for twenty minutes* Task: "Make Springfielders Petition for a Theme Park" (x5). The jobs take place at the Town Hall or Simpson House and take 6 seconds. After sending Homer on the job I'm being exploited! After sending Bart on the job Working for free! After sending Apu on the job On some level, I know this is a bad idea! After finishing the task What a bunch of idiots. They sure are. God, I love them. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 2[edit]

After completing Pt. 1 If we don't build ourselves a new theme park, then the nuclear bombs win! Woo! Pride! With this project, we will create hundreds of *cough* *cough* unpaid *cough* backbreaking jobs! Jobs! Jobs! Jobs! Task: "Place Itchy & Scratchy Land Gate". Task: "Build Bart's Treehouse". I now pronounce Itchy & Scratchy Land...open! Blow it up! No, you idiot! Not for a few years! Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 3[edit]

After tapping on Bart's exclamation mark Hey, dummy, you opened a park with no rides. That's why admission is so cheap, only forty-five dollars! At that price, I can afford to take the wife and kids! It's a great time to be a ten-year-old father of two. Here comes our first ride now. Look alive, Sky Finger! Task: "Place Injury 500". Task: "Move Injury 500 Long Track to Fill Track Gap". Task: "Make Bart Ride Injury 500". The job takes place at Injury 500 and takes 6 seconds. Task: "Make Springfielders Staff Rides" (x3). The jobs take place at IS Attractions and take 6 seconds. Quest reward: 100/100/100 and 10

Characters that can do the "Staff Rides" job include:

Pt. 4[edit]

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark Stupid tourists. Hey, idiots, way to come from a place I don't! Zip it, Simpson. Those tourists are willing to drop hundreds on cheap, worthless park souvenirs. Not if I buy them first! Task: "Tap Park Visitors" (x10). Task: "Tap Park Visitors in Other Springfields" (x3). Rather than hire teenagers to wear walk-around costumes, we'll use science to actually bring Itchy and Scratchy to life. Using this smoky, terrifying machine, Professor Frink can animate cartoon cells into living Itchies and Scratchies. But first, perhaps he'd like to issue a dire warning on the dangers of playing God. Why? Are you actually going to listen? Well, no. OH REALLY?! WHAT A STUNNER! LOOK AT ME, I'M STUNNED! Just press the big red button and doom us all, already. Reward: Itchy Hee hee hee! Here, kitty, kitty! Aaaaaah! Quest reward: 100/100/100 and 10

Pt. 5[edit]

After tapping on Itchy's exclamation mark *maniacal laughter* Itchy LOVE stabby! The adorable mouse is stabbing everyone in sight! What a shock. If only someone had warned us. It okay! Me use big needle and thread and sew them up good as new! That only works in your stupid, sadistic cartoon, you nutcase! Whoa, whoa. "Stupid"? "Nutcase"? For crying out loud...words hurt, lady. Task: "Build Nurse's Station". It takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Itchy Threaten Everyone". The job takes 4 hours. All dem people good as new! Ready for more stabby! Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 6[edit]

After tapping on Quimby's exclamation mark No telling what a murder rate of one in three will mean for our "Theme Park Monthly" rating. The network is not happy. They're sending one of their top executives to take control. We're saved! What? Network ratings have been declining for decades. You think a TV exec can fix anything? But they are WORLD-CLASS in blame avoidance. If there's a scapegoat out there we can pin this whole debacle on, trust me, she'll find it. We're saved! Task: "Unlock Diane". I'm hungry. Assemble a focus group to tell me what I want for lunch. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 7[edit]

After tapping on Diane's exclamation mark We've got a reanimated nightmare rodent slaughtering at will. How is that playing with the eighteen to forty-nine-year-olds? Um... bad? Call a town meeting. We have to get ahead of this thing, let the audience know that WE know we've let them down. Then, we announce that we're bringing back "Mabel", the beloved nineteen-nineties sitcom. Boom! Crisis averted. My God, you're wonderful. Task: "Make Diane Avoid Blame". The job takes place at the Itchy & Scratchy Land Gate and takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Springfielders Gather for a Meeting" (x5). The jobs take place at the Itchy & Scratchy Land Gate and take 4 hours. Itchy, thank you for coming in. Let me say what a huge fan I am. Stabby stabby? Love it! Listen, how would you like your own one-hour weekday show on my network? You'd need to promise to stop the killing. Just until sweeps. Can Itchy's bandleader be Chris Daughtry? I'll set it up. He's a personal friend. Message You have completed the Act 1 story! Keep Springfielders working the attractions and collecting from Park Visitors, Act 2 starts soon! Quest reward: 200 and 20