| Dollar, Dollar, Hills Y'all
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| Tapped Out Quest Information
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Dollar, Dollar, Hills Y'all is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Homerpalooza content update. It requires Manager Cletus to be obtained.
Dialogue[edit]
| After tapping on Cletus' exclamation mark
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Hey Brandine! Look what I found while I was spring cleaning! That is, cleaning up all the old car springs we have in the back yard.
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That's your fancy jacket from when you were MIS-managing the kids' band an' wasting all their money!
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That's why I buried it under the car springs.
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My truck keys were in the pocket! I'm getting it off its concrete blocks and taking it for a spin.
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| Task: "Make Manager Cletus Go for a Spin". The job takes place at Cletus' Monster Truck and takes 60 minutes.
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Quest reward:  100 and  10
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| After tapping on Manager Cletus' exclamation mark
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I love wearing my fancy music manager jacket. I'm gonna take up managin' again.
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I just need an act better than the Spuckler Family Kids.
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Which means any act.
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| Task: "Make Manager Cletus Scout for Talent". The job takes place at Shops and takes 8 hours.
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Hey, twins. Freaks always get attention. You two got any musical talent?
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We can cough out Beethoven's Fifth Symphony.
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But you gotta keep us in a lotta cigarettes.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Manager Cletus' exclamation mark
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Despite my fancy jacket, I cain't seem to find a client to represent.
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And I have so much to give. Like possum gizzards and a kind of psoriasis found only in Appalachia.
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Guess I better visit my hillbilly therapist.
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| Task: "Make Manager Cletus Drink His Moonshine". The job takes place at Cletus's Farm and takes 6 hours.
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Well, manager coat, I do feel better after visiting my shrink.
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I call moonshine my shrink because it makes my intestines shrivel up.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Manager Cletus' exclamation mark
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Wow, Mr. Spuckler, that coat is killer.
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And your moonshine is intense! How would you like to have a partner in the booze biz?
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I dunno. You don't seem much like a hillbilly.
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I own a goose.
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Write us up a partnership agreement and let's start marking "X"s!
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Task: "Make Manager Cletus Sign an X". The job takes place at Cletus's Farm and takes 60 minutes.
If Jay G is owned: Task: "Make Jay G Climb a Rung of Ruthlessness". The job takes place at Jay G's Mansion and takes 60 minutes.
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Congratulations, Cletus. Your moonshine business has a new silent partner.
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*honk*
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And a not so silent one.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Manager Cletus' exclamation mark
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Alright, I gots a new batch of moonshine ready.
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You're the brand manager. Get out and find a celebrity spokesman to endorse it.
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I got a goat what's kinda notorious around the county.
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Hm. What's the next step up from a goat?
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Got it. A clown.
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| Task: "Make Manager Cletus Manage a Brand". The job takes 4 hours.
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Excellent job, Cletus. Your moonshine will be huge. I'm taking this partnership to the next level.
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The roof of the hay loft!?
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Nope. Freezing you out of the business.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Manager Cletus' exclamation mark
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Brandine! Jay G done took over my moonshine business.
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Turns out I signed over all rights to him. And signed a non-compete clause.
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Did you sign a non-feudin' clause?
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Nope.
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Then grease up yer squirrel gun.
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Task: "Make Manager Cletus Prepare a Hostile Takeover". The job takes place at Jay G's Mansion or Cletus's Farm and takes 4 hours.
If Jay G is owned: Task: "Make Jay G Move up Another Rung". The job takes place at Jay G's Mansion and takes 4 hours.
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Jay G says it's illegal for me to make my own moonshine.
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But them dang revenooers said the same thing, and that didn't stop me.
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And as long as your moonshine only make me go blind temporarily, you'll always have a customer in me.
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It's a wonderful life.
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| Quest reward: 200 and 20
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Behind the Laughter[edit]
The quest name is a reference to the line "dollar, dollar bill y'all" from the Jimmy Spicer song "Money (Dollar Bill Y'all)".
The following dialogue was cut from Pt. 5, meant to play after the job was started:
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I can't be seen promoting moonshine! I've got my own vodka brand, Krusty Absolut.
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True. But unlike your vodka, my moonshine isn't terrible.
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Well, there is that. You've got a spokesman!
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The following dialogue was cut from Pt. 6, meant to play after the job was started:
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Announcing the new and improved Cletus Moonshine: Golden Goose Brandy.
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If you didn't even want to make moonshine, why'd you shut Cletus down?
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Number one rule of ruthlessness: someone else's success is your failure.
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