| Mileage of the Lambs
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| Tapped Out Quest Information
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Mileage of the Lambs is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Hell on Wheels content update. It requires Billy to be obtained.
Dialogue[edit]
| After tapping on Billy's exclamation mark
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Hey, kid, you're not supposed to be hanging around here.
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Oh, come on, man. I'm bored and you guys have air hoses and hydraulic jacks.
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The sign says "No Horseplay".
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And the one over there says "Employees Must Wash Hands After Using the Bathroom," so I'm pretty sure signs don't have any actual authority here.
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Task: "Make Billy Chase a Troublemaker". The job takes place at the Gasso Station, a Shop, or Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Bart is owned: Task: "Make Bart Cause Trouble". The job takes place at a Shop or Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
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*panting* Come on, kid. Stop...running around. I'm...supposed to...chase off...troublemakers.
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Do you always do what you're SUPPOSED to do?
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I...uh...suppose so.
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*devious laugh* This is going to be more fun than the time I switched Milhouse's devices to Portuguese.
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Quest reward:  100 and  10
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| After tapping on Billy's exclamation mark
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So, let's get this straight, Billy. You're a teenager and you have all the teenager privileges like a driver's license and power tools, right?
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I only have my learner's permit. But yes to the power tools.
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And you don't take advantage of these privileges to create mischief?
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Is that wrong?
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Yes! Well...no it's not technically wrong. But that's my point!
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Stick with me, Billy. With my schemes and your inability to think for yourself, we're going to have fun.
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Task: "Make Billy Follow Bart's Lead". The job takes place at a Shop or Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Bart is owned: Task: "Make Bart "Personalize" People's Cars". The job takes place at a Shop or Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
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That was a fine morning of pranking, Billy.
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Mrs. Lovejoy's car horn plays WAP, Groundskeeper Willie's lawnmower spits out soap bubbles, and Dr. Hibbert's vanity plate says "KWAK D0C"!
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I've never felt this alive before! I want to be like this all the time!
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Pace yourself, young grasshopper. You don't get to be a prolific prankster and avoid juvenile hall without taking it slow and steady. Savor the moment.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Billy's exclamation mark
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There he is, Chief Wiggum! These automotive pranks have all the classic hallmarks of one Bartholomew J. Simpson.
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Okay, Bart. You're coming downtown for questioning.
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You've got me dead to rights, Chief.
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Just let me hand this list of chores to my new friend, Billy.
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By your command, Sensei.
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Well...I wouldn't want you to get in trouble with your parents for shirking your chores.
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You'll be calling them from the station, by the way. They're still on speed dial, of course.
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Task: "Make Billy Run Mischievous Errands". The job takes place at a Shop or Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Bart is owned: Task: "Make Bart Submit to Interrogation". The job takes place at the Police Station or Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
If Wiggum is owned: Task: "Make Wiggum Question Bart". The job takes place at the Police Station or Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
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Reports of car pranks keep pouring in. But I was sure you were behind them, Bart.
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I was here with you the whole time.
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It just doesn't feel right. But I can't argue with facts.
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By my estimation, you can't do anything with them.
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Say, Bart, what would you say to helping us out. You're a master prankster; maybe you could tell us how this guy thinks and who he might be.
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You mean like Hannibal Lecter?
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Is that who you think is behind this?
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No. I meant I would be helping you the way Hannibal — Yes! Yes, I think these pranks are being pulled by Hannibal Lecter!
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*filling out a report form* How many Ns in Hannibal?
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Billy's exclamation mark
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Did you see me, Bart? I pulled off every prank on your list and it was the most exciting thing I've ever done in my life!
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You're a quick study to be sure, and I managed to get Wiggum off your trail. But I think you should lay low for a bit.
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No way! I'm bursting with ideas! Must prank now!
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Uh oh. I think I created a mechanical monster. Or at least a monstrous mechanic.
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| Task: "Make Billy Tamper With a Professional's Car". The job takes place at a Shop or Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
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Um, Billy, I think that last prank might have gone too far.
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Relax, Bart. You can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs. Or rear axles.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Billy's exclamation mark
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You are in deep trouble, mister! It's going to take forever to clean the marshmallow fluff out of the airbag in Mother's car!
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And that smoke bomb nearly doubled the amount of smoke coming out of my car!
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And my Model A has been reduced to running like a Model C+.
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What have I done? I just wanted to feel something for once.
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Oh, you'll feel something all right, young man. The lash of the justice system!
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Now, now, gentlemen. This is an impressionable young man. Impressionable, crafty, and lacking a father figure.
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I do have a dad.
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Lacking a father figure who is here right now. Come with me, young man.
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How would you like to join the Young Springfield Republicans?
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Task: "Make Billy Prepare for the Future". The job takes place at Republican Party HQ, Burns Manor, a Shop, or Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Mr. Burns is owned: Task: "Make Mr. Burns Prepare Another Disciple". The job takes place at Republican Party HQ, Burns Manor, a Shop, or Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
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| Quest reward: 200 and 20
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Behind the Laughter[edit]
The quest name is a reference to The Silence of the Lambs.
