  
The Internet of Wheels
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
| The Internet of Wheels
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| Tapped Out Quest Information
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The Internet of Wheels is an event-exclusive questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Hell on Wheels content update.
Dialogue[edit]
| Between May 1, 2022 and May 18, 2022
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Everyone is just staring at me with their I've-seen-your-credit-report eyes. I better get out of here. Maybe Krusty will give me a lift home.
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Sorry, Homer, I'm going to the V.I.P. lounge, so I hope you don't mind if I ditch you. Actually, it doesn't matter if you mind, 'cause that's what I'm doing.
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How am I gonna get home now? I don't wanna call Marge, and I don't think Youber drivers accept centavos.
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Howdy, stranger! You look like you could use a ride.
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Thanks. I'll just, uh, slide these chicken cages over...
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BAGAWK!
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Whoa! What's that about?
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Chickens ride in front, hitchhikers ride in back. In this here truck, that's the pecking order.
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Yeah...literally.
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If y'all are gonna use five-dollar words, you can find another ride.
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Task: "Collect Key Fobs" (x115).
Task: "Make Homer Ride in the Back of the Truck". The job takes place at Cletus's Farm, a Brown House, or the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
If Cletus is owned: Task: "Make Cletus Enjoy Giving Chickens a Ride". The job takes place at Cletus's Farm, a Brown House, or the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
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Thanks again, Cletus. So, how can someone of your...wealth... own a truck like this?
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Oh, I ain't the owner. It belongs to the chickens.
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Are they taking offers?
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BAGAWK!
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What'd she say?
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She needs to run a credit check.
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You can just drop me off at the next corner.
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Quest reward:  100 and  10
Yokel Truck
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| After completing Pt. 1
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Guess I'll have to call Marge for a ride after all...
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Why not let me do the driving?
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A talking car?! Where did you come from?
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From the CarGo headquarters building.
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A giant tech company building? Where did that come from?!
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Look, I'm not one of those disembodied voices that answers your stupid questions. I'm one of those disembodied voices that drives this car.
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Okay, drive me home.
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If you wish to drive me, just scan this QR code.
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...Uh...
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*sigh* Open the camera app on your phone and take a picture of the pixelated square near my door handle.
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A pixelated square? Where did that come from?
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Task: "Collect Key Fobs" (x155).
Task: "Make Homer Try to Figure Out How to Operate the Car". The job takes place at CarGo, a Shop, Brown House, or the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
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I opened the photo app on my phone. Now what?
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No, that's the gallery app. Open the camera app.
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Oh, okay. Now, I take a picture of you and that opens the door?
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No, not of me. Take a picture of the black-and-white sign that looks like a pattern of dots.
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The one that looks like an out-of-focus Ernest Hemingway?
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No, it doesn't look like—
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Oh, it actually kinda does.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
Parking Garage
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| After completing Pt. 2
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There! Did it!
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No, you just took another selfie.
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Of the QR code?
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No, of yourself. It's a selfie!
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Still not following you.
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Having trouble opening the door?
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We were watching from the cameras.
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There are cameras in the car?
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Yes, but we were watching from the ones in space. I'm Antoine and this is Zora. We're the CEOs of CarGo.
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Homer, we think you're the ultimate everyman, and so we'd like to give you our new CarGo Self-Driving Car free of charge, as a special promotion!
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Woohoo! Free car!
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Really? That guy? We must be running out of customers.
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Task: "Collect Key Fobs" (x115).
Task: "Make Homer Celebrate Getting a Free Car". The job takes place at CarGo, Moe's Tavern, an Eatery, or the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
If Antoine and Zora are owned: Task: "Make Antoine and Zora Plan a Promotional Campaign". The job takes place at CarGo and takes 4 hours.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
Duke Druther's Auto Detailing Billboard
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| After completing Pt. 3
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Homer, why don't you get in the car and let it take you for a spin?
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Okay!
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I'll drive you around the parking lot while you just sit back and enjoy the sights. Isn't this relaxing?
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BORING!
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Boring? Well, what if I do some donuts?
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Now you're speaking my language!
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Task: "Collect Key Fobs" (x115).
If Antoine and Zora are owned: Task: "Make Antoine and Zora Watch the Car Do Donuts". The job takes place at CarGo and takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Homer Eat Donuts While Doing Donuts". The job takes place at CarGo, a Parking Lot, Eatery, or the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
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Woohoo! That was fun! More donuts!
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So, you'll take the car?
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And more donuts! With sprinkles please.
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I'm also gonna need a travel mug.
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Uh, I think we have some donuts in the breakroom, but I don't know about a travel mug.
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The travel mug is important.
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*texting* I'll see if one of our programmers can bring one over right now.
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Your programmers are still working this late?
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They only stop for their company-mandated three hours of sleep per night.
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It's common practice in our industry. It prevents programming errorssssssssssssssssss.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
Springfield Car Wash
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| After completing Pt. 4
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Wow, letting you drive me home really is great! I never realized there was a stop sign back there.
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Yes, your driving record indicates as much.
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I'm thinking you could have an even bigger role in my life! I'm picturing you self-working my job, self-attending parent-teacher meetings...
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Self-drinking your beer?
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Get your own!
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Task: "Collect Key Fobs" (x195).
Task: "Make Homer Enjoy the Ride Home". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
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We've arrived at your home.
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I didn't realize it was so late. Do you think Marge noticed?
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You've received 17 calls from her. You should really turn your notifications back on.
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Okay, I'm gonna need you to self-talk to Marge while I sneak in the back door and pretend I was home all along.
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I calculate a less than three-percent probability that any member of your family will fall for this ruse, including the pets.
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That suspicious cat is bringing my average way down.
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Quest reward: 200 and 20
CarGo Smart Car
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Currency-earning jobs[edit]
| Task
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Character(s)
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Time
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Location(s)
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Reward
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| Steal Key Fobs From Dealerships
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Homer, Marge, Lisa, Bart, Krusty, Cletus, Lenny, Carl
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4h
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Kliff's Kar Chalet, Crazy Vaclav's Place of Automobiles, Simpson House
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 5, 45
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| Get Batteries for Key Fobs
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Antoine and Zora, Crazy Vaclav, Kliff
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CarGo, Kliff's Kar Chalet, Crazy Vaclav's Place of Automobiles, Simpson House
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8, 70
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Behind the Laughter[edit]
The quest name is a reference to the "Internet of things."
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