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Taxes Hold'em

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Revision as of 09:59, July 5, 2024 by Solar Dragon (talk | contribs)


Taxes Hold'em
Tapped Out Quest Information
Level: 35
Update: IRS and Job Manager
Required characters: Homer

Taxes Hold'em is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the IRS and Job Manager content update. It unlocks the IRS.

Dialogue

Pt. 1

After reaching Level 35
Homer The best part of rebuilding Springfield is that it makes me proud of my accomplishments.
Homer - Happy On second thought, the best part of rebuilding Springfield is all the money I'm collecting.
Message Complete this quest chain to unlock the IRS. Use the IRS building to collect income easier!
Task: "Make Homer Collect Income by Hardly Working". The job takes 45 seconds.
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10

Pt. 2

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
Homer - Sad Earning money is a lot harder now that Springfield is so big, and everything is so expensive!
Lisa It's called inflation. The more money you create out of thin air, the more expensive things will get.
Homer - Thoughtful I don't really have THAT much money though, see…
Task: "Make Homer Count His Money". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 60 minutes.
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10

Pt. 3

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
Homer Okay, okay. Maybe I have SOME money. Is that such a crime?
Agent Johnson Actually, Mr. Simpson. Not paying taxes on your income is a very serious crime.
Agent Johnson I'm Agent Johnson of the IRS, and you're going to tell me who else in town has been evading their taxes.
Homer - Sarcastic Look, I get it. You're playing good cop, bad cop. I'd like to speak to the good cop, please.
Agent Johnson That's cute. I am the good cop.
Homer - Scared *whimper*
Task: "Make Homer Snitch on Tax Evaders". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 60 minutes.
Agent Johnson So what you're saying is that everyone in Springfield hasn't paid any taxes since the town was destroyed?!
Agent Johnson Even for a member of the IRS that's too much paperwork.
Agent Johnson I suppose since nobody can even tell me what state we're in I have no choice but to let it slide.
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10

Pt. 4

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
Homer So, Agent Johnson. What are you going to do now that the IRS is letting everyone in town evade their taxes?
Agent Johnson Our branch has to do something, and collecting money is all we know. Isn't there any use for that in this town?
Homer Actually…
Message Collect your income faster with the IRS - available in the store now!
Task: "Build the IRS". It takes 6 seconds.
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10

Pt. 5

After building IRS Building:
Agent Johnson Okay, we've set up our new PERSONAL tax collection service.
Agent Johnson We've started with the base service, which is free of charge.
Homer - Sarcastic Yeah, free, right. I know how things work in this game.
Agent Johnson Come on, it's free! Give it a try. It will allow you to collect your income in a more efficient, a.k.a. lazier way.
Message Tap on buildings and characters to collect in a radius around them. Upgrade the IRS to increase the area!
Task: "Collect Income Using the IRS" (x3).
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10

Pt. 6

After completing Pt. 5
Homer - Mouth Full You really did make it easier. Now I can collect taxes while sitting on my couch with a beer in one hand, a sandwich in the other, another beer balanced on my belly, and in this cup holder… a second sandwich.
Agent Johnson I'm afraid to ask what you used to collect taxes with.
Homer Years of working at the power plant has left me with a pretty useful vestigial tail.
Homer - Annoyed And a pretty useless case of irreversible radiation poisoning.
Homer - Thoughtful So… can you make that circle thing even bigger so I can collect more money, in less time?
Agent Johnson Of course! You just need to upgrade to our Deluxe or Mega-Lazy service.
Agent Johnson Every time you do we’ll make it even easier for you to collect your income.
Homer - Confused So to do less work collecting money, I need to earn a bunch of money first by working?
Agent Johnson Exactly. Let me give you a little lesson in economics.
Homer - Annoyed Ugh, nevermind. I'll pay for the program as long as I don't have to learn anything.
Message Upgrade the IRS to increase the Tax Collection Radius and save yourself more tapping!
Task: "Upgrade the IRS to Level 2".
Quest reward: Cash2,500 and XP250
After upgrading the IRS to Level 9
Homer - Annoyed This is where all my taxes go? To build the IRS a nicer building?!
Homer - Angry I wanted it to go to increased military spending!

Behind the Laughter

The quest name is a reference to the poker variation Texas hold 'em.