Difference between revisions of "Taxes Hold'em"

Latest revision as of 10:14, July 5, 2024

Taxes Hold'em is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the IRS and Job Manager content update. It unlocks the IRS.

Dialogue[edit]

Pt. 1[edit]

After reaching Level 35 The best part of rebuilding Springfield is that it makes me proud of my accomplishments. On second thought, the best part of rebuilding Springfield is all the money I'm collecting. Message Complete this quest chain to unlock the IRS. Use the IRS building to collect income easier! Task: "Make Homer Collect Income by Hardly Working". The job takes 45 seconds. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 2[edit]

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark Earning money is a lot harder now that Springfield is so big, and everything is so expensive! It's called inflation. The more money you create out of thin air, the more expensive things will get. I don't really have THAT much money though, see... Task: "Make Homer Count His Money". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 60 minutes. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 3[edit]

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark Okay, okay. Maybe I have SOME money. Is that such a crime? Actually, Mr. Simpson. Not paying taxes on your income is a very serious crime. I'm Agent Johnson of the IRS, and you're going to tell me who else in town has been evading their taxes. Look, I get it. You're playing good cop, bad cop. I'd like to speak to the good cop, please. That's cute. I am the good cop. *whimper* Task: "Make Homer Snitch on Tax Evaders". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 60 minutes. So what you're saying is that everyone in Springfield hasn't paid any taxes since the town was destroyed?! Even for a member of the IRS that's too much paperwork. I suppose since nobody can even tell me what state we're in I have no choice but to let it slide. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 4[edit]

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark So, Agent Johnson. What are you going to do now that the IRS is letting everyone in town evade their taxes? Our branch has to do something, and collecting money is all we know. Isn't there any use for that in this town? Actually... Message Collect your income faster with the IRS - available in the store now! Task: "Build the IRS". It takes 6 seconds. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 5[edit]

After building IRS Building: Okay, we've set up our new PERSONAL tax collection service. We've started with the base service, which is free of charge. Yeah, free, right. I know how things work in this game. Come on, it's free! Give it a try. It will allow you to collect your income in a more efficient, a.k.a. lazier way. Message Tap on buildings and characters to collect in a radius around them. Upgrade the IRS to increase the area! Task: "Collect Income Using the IRS" (x3). Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 6[edit]

After completing Pt. 5 You really did make it easier. Now I can collect taxes while sitting on my couch with a beer in one hand, a sandwich in the other, another beer balanced on my belly, and in this cup holder... a second sandwich. I'm afraid to ask what you used to collect taxes with. Years of working at the power plant has left me with a pretty useful vestigial tail. And a pretty useless case of irreversible radiation poisoning. So... can you make that circle thing even bigger so I can collect more money, in less time? Of course! You just need to upgrade to our Deluxe or Mega-Lazy service. Every time you do we'll make it even easier for you to collect your income. So to do less work collecting money, I need to earn a bunch of money first by working? Exactly. Let me give you a little lesson in economics. Ugh, nevermind. I'll pay for the program as long as I don't have to learn anything. Message Upgrade the IRS to increase the Tax Collection Radius and save yourself more tapping! Task: "Upgrade the IRS to Level 2". Quest reward: 2,500 and 250 After upgrading the IRS to Level 9 This is where all my taxes go? To build the IRS a nicer building?! I wanted it to go to increased military spending!

Behind the Laughter[edit]

The quest name is a reference to the poker variation Texas hold 'em.