The Once and Future Bartman Part One: Alpha and D'oh-Mega/Quotes

Quotes

Bartman: Chief Wiggum, what's the situation?

Ralph Wiggum: Someone made the Duffguy take a kid nap! I guess he was cranky and fussy and needed to lie down.

Eddie: What the chief means is that someone kidnapped Lamarcus Duffman, that last man to ever be Duff Beer's mascot!

Lou: He send out a video message before he was abducted.

Comic Book Guy: Someone stole my mint-condition copy of Radioactive Man #1!

Houseboy: [GASP] Stealing editor Morty Mann's greatest publishing triumph is anything but petty theft!

Comic Book Guy: In addition to leaving behind woe and sorrow, the criminal also left this note! Please disregard the pepperoni and tear stains. Those are from me.

Kent Brockman: Kent Brockman here, reporting on a new bandit that seems to be the first of a new breed.

Marge: They stole the mini-golf scorecard from our first date! I don't know why anyone would want to steal that. It only has sentimental value.

Homer: Plus, it was my best score ever! Thirty-seeven over par!

Professor Frink: Numero Uno has pilfered my very first invention! It was an atomic potato clock! I invented it when I was three years old! Back when I was just a tiny little scientist, standing on the shoulders of my father for piggyback rides!

Bartman: Sorry to hear that, Professor.

Professor Frink: Great glavin, I loved that clock oh-so much! Not only did it tell perfect time, but it also made fries!

Bartman: I still can't believe that you of all people turned into a crook!

Martin Prince: Well, after what happened to Houseboy, I decided to turn myself into a crook before Bartman turned me into one!