| After starting the update
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Going once, going twice, this 18th century Qing Dynasty porcelain vase is...
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*bangs gavel* SOLD to Mr. Burns for $10,000!
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Smithers, order me a celebratory drink!
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Excuse me, bartender, can I get a Brandy Alexander?
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A what? Order something normal. All I got is booze that looks like water, and beer that tastes like water.
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Oh my, a sassy servant? I've heard about these. Who are you and what is your full-time occupation?
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Moe Szyslak here, the proud owner of the worst bar in Springfield. I'm only mixing drinks at this snooze fest so I can keep my bar's doors open — not that anyone would notice if they closed.
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I too own a small business...as well as many large businesses, and even larger conglomerates. What is the name of your enterprise?
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Sir, Moe Szyslak owns and operates "Moe's Tavern". It's semi-popular amongst a small throng of your least effective employees.
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Moe's Tavern, eh? I must admit, I have never heard of your haunt nor plan to ever set foot in it. But I do find your candidness refreshing in this extremely pretentious bubble I choose to live in.
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Look, I'm not used to super-wordy compliments. If I say "thank youse" will you give me a giant tip or something?
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Sir, we should get going. They're about to auction off that Russian oligarch's yacht that was seized in Monaco.
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Don't interrupt, Smithers. Now, Mr. Szyslak, how would you like to escape this monotonous auction and join me and my friends at my mansion? It'll be an after-party for the ages!
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After-party at a mansion?! Beats watering down drinks for these geriatric freaks, no offense.
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Excellent!
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Wait, this isn't some 'Eyes Wide Shut' erotic ritual type party, right? Because Venetian masks don't cover enough of my face according to most women.
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No, no. It's just a standard fête with some of my favorite "chums-from-other-mums".
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Smithers, ready the blimp-ousine!
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Blimp-ousine?
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It's a limousine blimp. My helicopter's in the shop, as is my limousine helicopter. But not to worry, the old stretch Hindenburg still flies great.
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If The Rich Texan is owned: Task: "Make The Rich Texan Bid On the Seized Yacht". The job takes place at Burns Manor, Burns' Summer Mansion, Mansions, Cooling Towers, Control Building, or a Visitable Home and takes 6 seconds.
Task: "Make Mr. Burns Boast About the Blimp-ousine". The job takes place at Burns Manor, Burns' Summer Mansion, Mansions, Cooling Towers, Control Building, or a Visitable Home and takes 6 seconds.
Task: "Make Moe Drink Champagne". The job takes place at Burns Manor, Burns' Summer Mansion, Mansions, Cooling Towers, Control Building, or a Visitable Home and takes 6 seconds.
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I can't believe I'm on a blimp-ousine! I'm as happy as Tom Hanks in 'Big' when he got to date that hot, older businesswoman!
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It's a magnificent mode of transport. Sure, it takes four times as long as driving a car, but you can't beat the feeling of looking down on all of Springfield from up here.
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Smithers, refill our champagne while I excuse myself to the urinal.
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What urinal?
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Oh, you mean the city below us. Of course.
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So Smithers, are you like this rich guy's butler or something?
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No, I'm an elite member of Mr. Burns' inner circle. I have proved myself and thus attained a status befitting my success.
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Geez, I don't need your whole life story.
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Look, Moe, before we get to Burns' manor, I should warn you...
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Warn me?! So this IS some creepy 'Eyes Wide Shut' type party?!
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NO. Did you recently see that movie or something? You keep mentioning it.
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Nah, never seen it.
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There is no "after-party".
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Whaaaaa?!
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Mr. Burns didn't invite you to his mansion just to stay one night. He's inviting you to live there for the summer as his latest "protégé."
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That's what you're warning me about?! That I get to live at an awesome mansion for the entire summer?! Is there a pool?! I bet there's a pool!
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There are several pools. Do you really think Mr. Burns regards you as anything other than a toy?
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Who cares? Thirty minutes ago I was bartending for non-tipping fat-cats, and now I'm taking a limousine blimp to a mansion.
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Quest reward:  100 and  10
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