'Round Springfield/Quotes
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- Homer: Lisa, when you get to be our age, you learn a few things. Like when a sign says 'Do not feed the bears' [holds up his arm with a bear cub having its claws and teeth sunk into it] man, you better not feed the bears.
- Bart: Mrs Krabappel, I can't take the test, I have a stomach ache.
- Mrs. Krabappel: Well, that's a lame excuse for an excuse - Ha!
- Bart: Look, if you ignore me and I die, you'll get in a lot of trouble.
- Mrs. Krabappel: Read page six of the School Charter.
- Bart: No teacher shall be held acountable if Bart Simpson dies.
- Mrs. Krabappel: We're also absolved if Milhouse gets eaten by the school snake.
- [Cut to Milhouse, who has been eaten by the school snake.]
- Milhouse: Hey, cool, there's a rabbit in here!
- Homer: Lisa, honey, are you going to be okay?
- Lisa: Bleeding Gums was my hero and I never got to tell him how I felt.
- Homer: Oh, I'm sure he knew, and I'm sure that wherever he is now, he's happy.
- Lisa: But he was the only person that had the same love for music that I do.
- [Suddenly, Maggie gives Lisa a pacifier.]
- Lisa: Thank you. Oh, Dad, why did he have to die?
- Homer: Well, it's like the time that your cat Snowball got run over.
- Lisa: Uh huh.
- Homer: Remember, honey?
- Lisa: Yeah.
- Homer: What I'm saying is, all we have to do is go down to the pound and get a new jazzman.
- Lisa: [wailing] Oh, Dad! [weeps]