Difference between revisions of "Free Range/Quotes"
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− | {{TabQ}} | + | {{TabQ|nogags}} |
− | {{ | + | |
+ | {{qf|[[Jimbo Jones]]}} ''[scoffing]'' This game'd be cool if they didn't make the controls so weak! | ||
+ | {{qf|[[Dolph Shapiro]]}} Maybe you should file a complaint with the American Noob Society. | ||
+ | {{qf|Jimbo}} Maybe I should file '''you'''! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | :''[ | + | {{qf|[[Carol Jones]]}} Jimbo, do you and your friend like wieners? |
− | + | :''[Dolph snickers.]'' | |
− | + | {{qf|Jimbo}} Yeah, Mom. And if you wanna call 'em hot dogs next time, that's cool, too. | |
− | + | {{qf|Carol Jones}} Oh, the co-op keeps sending me too many eggs. We'll never eat all these eggs. Can you ask Dolph if his mom can use a huge amount of eggs? | |
+ | :''[A crafty look appears on Jimbo's face.]'' | ||
+ | {{qf|Jimbo}} Hmmm, yeah, he—''[quickly corrects himself]''—I mean, '''she''' can definitely use eggs. | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | {{qf|[[Principal Skinner]]}} ''[exiting the men's room]'' I don't like it, Apu. | ||
+ | {{qf|[[Apu]]}} Be that as it may, our restrooms are fully cleaned twice a week. | ||
+ | {{qf|Skinner}} No, no, I mean this article about the decrease in vandalism. It feels like the calm before the proverbial storm. | ||
+ | {{qf|Apu}} Perhaps our brand new Mocha [[Squishee]] Latte could brighten your mood. | ||
+ | {{qf|Skinner}} I'm afraid not, my friend. I must stay vigilant and deny myself the creature comforts of a false sense of security. I'll ... uh ... stick with my usual Squishee-ccino if you don't mind. | ||
+ | {{qf|Apu}} It would be my pleasure. | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | {{qf|Skinner}} ''[exiting the store and confronting Bart]'' Bart Simpson! You aren't up to any mischief with that banana peel, are you? | ||
+ | {{qf|[[Bart]]}} No, sir, sir! ''[thinking quickly]'' Uh ... this is where the trash can used to be ... guess they moved it. | ||
+ | {{qf|Skinner}} See that you find the appropriate receptacle, young man! | ||
+ | :''[Jimbo calls out to Bart from the roof of the store.]'' | ||
+ | {{qf|Jimbo}} Hey! I need some ideas. If you help me out, I'll tell you the top secret bullies' method of climbing up on this roof. | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} ''[instantly appearing on the roof]'' You mean like this? | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} Whatcha doing up here, man? | ||
+ | {{qf|Jimbo}} Eh, I come up here when I need to think. | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} How often is that? | ||
+ | {{qf|Jimbo}} Look ... Me, Dolph and Kearney are sitting on this mother lode of eggs. And we've got ... What's the delinquent's equivalent of writer's block? | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} Delinquentitis? | ||
+ | {{qf|Jimbo}} Yeah! And it's tearing us apart. We couldn't agree on one plan, so we had a big falling out. Nobody's vandalized school property in weeks. | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} ''[pleased and surprised]'' So you want '''my''' help? ''[thinks quickly]'' Well, with that many eggs you just gotta think extra large. So ... Step One: Hijack the Duff Blimp. Step Two: Egg all of Springfield. Voila! | ||
+ | {{qf|Jimbo}} ''[scoffs]'' That was, like, the first thing we thought of. I'll write that down just so I can laugh at it later. Guess ya can't trust a little kid to come up with quality deviltry. | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} ''[crestfallen]'' Aww ... | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|[[Martin Prince]]}} It's so refreshing to walk down the steet without being harangued or bullied. The sun is out, birds are chirping ... ''[puzzled]'' ... The Duff Beer Blimp is hovering above me ... ? | |
− | + | :''[Three eggs come down from the blimp and hit Martin. Aboard the blimp are Dolph, Jimbo and Kearney.]'' | |
− | + | {{qf|Jimbo}} ''[using a megaphone]'' Hey, kid! You just got egged! | |
− | + | {{qf|Martin}} ''[angry]'' I know!! | |
− | + | ---- | |
− | :''[ | + | {{qf|Dolph}} This is really special, you guys. |
− | + | {{qf|Jimbo}} Yeah, I'd say this might actually be the sweetest gondola I've ever ridden in. | |
---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|[[Helen Lovejoy]]}} So today, Mothers Against Any And All Antisocial Delinquency would like to acknowledge the following person for his efforts to curb vandalism ... Chief Wiggum! | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} Omigosh, I won! Lou, I won! | |
− | :''' | + | {{qf|[[Lou]]}} Nice work, Chief. |
− | + | {{qf|Helen}} Here's the award. It's a gold-plated bar chart showing the decrease in vandalism over the last month. | |
− | + | {{qf|Chief Wiggum}} ''[taking the award from Helen]'' Well, first of all, I'd like to thank -- | |
− | + | :''[Wiggum's acceptance speech is interrupted by a single egg coming down from the sky, scoring a direct hit on the award.]'' | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Agnes Skinner]]}} ''[pointing skyward]'' Vandalism! | |
+ | {{qf|Chief Wiggum}} Wait ... ''[wiping the egg off of the award with his sleeve]'' Nope! The award clearly shows that vandalism is still down! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|[[Kearney Zzyzwicz]]}} Cheezit, the cops! Hard starboard! | |
− | + | {{qf|Jimbo}} ''[at controls]'' Speak English! | |
− | + | {{qf|Dolph}} Turn right, Einstein! | |
− | + | {{qf|Jimbo}} ''[grumbling]'' Why'd they make these controls so weak? | |
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
---- | ---- | ||
+ | {{qf|Jimbo}} Hey, Simpson! Nice dolls! | ||
+ | :''[Jimbo, Dolph and Kearney each throw an egg. All three eggs hit Bart.]'' | ||
+ | {{qf|Milhouse}} ''[indignantly, yelling back at the bullies]'' They're called action figures! ''[to Bart]'' Wow! What are the odds of that happening? ''[notices Bart is grinning from ear to ear]'' Hey, what are you smiling about? | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} ''[in awe]'' They used '''my''' idea! | ||
+ | |||
+ | [[Category:Bart Simpson comics stories quotes]] |
Latest revision as of 12:07, March 7, 2022
- Jimbo Jones: [scoffing] This game'd be cool if they didn't make the controls so weak!
- Dolph Shapiro: Maybe you should file a complaint with the American Noob Society.
- Jimbo: Maybe I should file you!
- Carol Jones: Jimbo, do you and your friend like wieners?
- [Dolph snickers.]
- Jimbo: Yeah, Mom. And if you wanna call 'em hot dogs next time, that's cool, too.
- Carol Jones: Oh, the co-op keeps sending me too many eggs. We'll never eat all these eggs. Can you ask Dolph if his mom can use a huge amount of eggs?
- [A crafty look appears on Jimbo's face.]
- Jimbo: Hmmm, yeah, he—[quickly corrects himself]—I mean, she can definitely use eggs.
- Principal Skinner: [exiting the men's room] I don't like it, Apu.
- Apu: Be that as it may, our restrooms are fully cleaned twice a week.
- Skinner: No, no, I mean this article about the decrease in vandalism. It feels like the calm before the proverbial storm.
- Apu: Perhaps our brand new Mocha Squishee Latte could brighten your mood.
- Skinner: I'm afraid not, my friend. I must stay vigilant and deny myself the creature comforts of a false sense of security. I'll ... uh ... stick with my usual Squishee-ccino if you don't mind.
- Apu: It would be my pleasure.
- Skinner: [exiting the store and confronting Bart] Bart Simpson! You aren't up to any mischief with that banana peel, are you?
- Bart: No, sir, sir! [thinking quickly] Uh ... this is where the trash can used to be ... guess they moved it.
- Skinner: See that you find the appropriate receptacle, young man!
- [Jimbo calls out to Bart from the roof of the store.]
- Jimbo: Hey! I need some ideas. If you help me out, I'll tell you the top secret bullies' method of climbing up on this roof.
- Bart: [instantly appearing on the roof] You mean like this?
- Bart: Whatcha doing up here, man?
- Jimbo: Eh, I come up here when I need to think.
- Bart: How often is that?
- Jimbo: Look ... Me, Dolph and Kearney are sitting on this mother lode of eggs. And we've got ... What's the delinquent's equivalent of writer's block?
- Bart: Delinquentitis?
- Jimbo: Yeah! And it's tearing us apart. We couldn't agree on one plan, so we had a big falling out. Nobody's vandalized school property in weeks.
- Bart: [pleased and surprised] So you want my help? [thinks quickly] Well, with that many eggs you just gotta think extra large. So ... Step One: Hijack the Duff Blimp. Step Two: Egg all of Springfield. Voila!
- Jimbo: [scoffs] That was, like, the first thing we thought of. I'll write that down just so I can laugh at it later. Guess ya can't trust a little kid to come up with quality deviltry.
- Bart: [crestfallen] Aww ...
- Martin Prince: It's so refreshing to walk down the steet without being harangued or bullied. The sun is out, birds are chirping ... [puzzled] ... The Duff Beer Blimp is hovering above me ... ?
- [Three eggs come down from the blimp and hit Martin. Aboard the blimp are Dolph, Jimbo and Kearney.]
- Jimbo: [using a megaphone] Hey, kid! You just got egged!
- Martin: [angry] I know!!
- Dolph: This is really special, you guys.
- Jimbo: Yeah, I'd say this might actually be the sweetest gondola I've ever ridden in.
- Helen Lovejoy: So today, Mothers Against Any And All Antisocial Delinquency would like to acknowledge the following person for his efforts to curb vandalism ... Chief Wiggum!
- Chief Wiggum: Omigosh, I won! Lou, I won!
- Lou: Nice work, Chief.
- Helen: Here's the award. It's a gold-plated bar chart showing the decrease in vandalism over the last month.
- Chief Wiggum: [taking the award from Helen] Well, first of all, I'd like to thank --
- [Wiggum's acceptance speech is interrupted by a single egg coming down from the sky, scoring a direct hit on the award.]
- Agnes Skinner: [pointing skyward] Vandalism!
- Chief Wiggum: Wait ... [wiping the egg off of the award with his sleeve] Nope! The award clearly shows that vandalism is still down!
- Kearney Zzyzwicz: Cheezit, the cops! Hard starboard!
- Jimbo: [at controls] Speak English!
- Dolph: Turn right, Einstein!
- Jimbo: [grumbling] Why'd they make these controls so weak?
- Jimbo: Hey, Simpson! Nice dolls!
- [Jimbo, Dolph and Kearney each throw an egg. All three eggs hit Bart.]
- Milhouse: [indignantly, yelling back at the bullies] They're called action figures! [to Bart] Wow! What are the odds of that happening? [notices Bart is grinning from ear to ear] Hey, what are you smiling about?
- Bart: [in awe] They used my idea!