  
¡The Fall Guy-Yi-Yi!/Quotes
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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"¡The Fall Guy-Yi-Yi!"
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- Bart: [thinking] This is it, Bart. If you strike Uter out, the team gets a pizza party and you'll die a legend. Lose and we just get the pizza party.
- Bart: It only took 200 years, but baseball finally got interesting.
- Lewis Clark: My dad does security for James Corden. You know how many people wanna punch James Corden?
- Bart: Well, my dad's a badass too.
- Martin Prince: [giggles] Oh, Bart, "dumbass" is not synonymous with "badass."
- Bart: Hey, I got tickets to tonight's MMA fight. Should be pretty badass.
- Homer: Uh, why don't you take Lisa? She could use some toughening up.
- Marge: Homer, either bond with your son or help me fold this laundry.
- Homer: Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Ugh! Fine.
- Lenny Leonard: Hey, Carl. Your shoelace is untied.
- Carl Carlson: So's yours.
- Lenny and Carl: Crisscross.
- Bumblebee Man: Señor Fatso. That was the most hilarious fall I've ever seen in my life. The antics, the physics, the annoyed grunts. Sir, I would like to buy you a drink.
- Homer: Throw in a food and you got a deal.
- Bumblebee Man: I didn't know you, uh, yacht rock types watch my show.
- Homer: Are you kidding? I don't know Spanish, but when you get kicked in the junk by a nun, you speak the international language of crotch.
- Bumblebee Man: And so, Bumblebee Man was born, a tragicomic figure cursed by the cosmos, like Sisyphus or Benny Hill. No matter what life throws at him, he always gets up and tries again, just like the hardworking people that watch my show. So, day after day, year after year, I sacrificed my bumble body on the altar of comedy. I thought I was invincible, like Curly from the Stooges. But alas, I was just a mortal Shemp. I suppose time catches up to us all. Now my tired show limps on in the shadow of its former glory. Simpsons, have you any idea what this is like?
- Bart: Stunt double? That's the badassiest job a dad could have. He'll do it.
- Homer: What, are you crazy?
- Bart: Think about it, Homer. You get to crash cars and have bottles broken over your head. All the stuff you do now, but you get paid for it.
- Bumblebee Man: This is no mere costume. It is the armor of hope, a beacon of light, a symbol of truth, justice, and the Mexican-American güey.
- Bumblebee Man: Before we get started, I must ask you to sign a nondisclosure agreement, for my fans would be devastated to know I'm not doing my own stunts.
- Homer: No problem, Pedro. I sign tons of NDAs. In fact, I just signed one at work. Apparently, our drinking water is full of radioactive… nothing.
- Bart: And then everyone on set high-fived Dad. Even the non-writing producers.
- Marge: Ooh! They're a hard bunch to please.
- Lisa: Dad, isn't it problematic for a white man to double for a Mexican actor?
- Homer: The director thought that too, so he gave me these brown sleeves to wear.
- Lisa: [gasp] But that's Brown face.
- Homer: No, it's just brown arms and legs. Besides, with all the ICE going on these days, isn't it better to have a white guy suffer instead of a Mexican guy?
- Mexican grandmother: [in Spanish] Go on. Ask him sweetie.
- Mexican girl: Can I smash you over the head with my crowbar?
- Bumblebee Man: Uh, I would love to, but, uh, it's a union thing. But you can hit my friend if you'd like.
- Homer: Huh? D'oh!
- Homer: Hey, who needs credit when you get after-work hugs from your twin boys?
- Bart: Did you get a concussion today, Dad?
- Homer: Maybe. Don't tell your mothers.
- Marge: You said this was all pies in the face and slipping on plantain peels.
- Homer: [chuckles] Don't worry, Marge. I'm sure something got lost in translation.
- Marge: He said it in English.
- Homer: Can't hug. Spent all day getting my Aztec kicked.
- Marge: It wasn't him.
- Lisa: It was me.
- Marge: It was? I thought I did it.
- Lisa: I guess we both did it?
- Bart: I was lying a second ago. I also did it.
- Alejandro González Iñárritu: Homero, you are the only one he will listen to. You have to stop him.
- Homer: Why are all these cameras set up?
- Alejandro González Iñárritu: Well, better to have coverage and not need it than to need it and not have it.
- Homer: All I wanted was for my son to think I was a badass. But you know what I learned after taking all that brutal punishment? I hate that kid, and what he thinks doesn't matter.
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