The Great Money Caper/Quotes
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- Homer: Lies got us into this mess, Son. From now on, it's honesty all the way.
- [At home.]
- Marge: You were carjacked… in the church parking lot?!
- Homer: Absolutely. We had stopped in for a quick prayer, when -- Bart, would you call him a crazy man?
- Bart: Definitely… well, crazy about carjacking.
- Lisa: What did he look like?
- Homer: Um… let's see… he was… foreign… and he had…
- Bart: Wild, bushy hair -- like an animal!
- Lisa: Anything else?
- Homer: Well, he seemed like a loner -- kept to himself, mostly.
- Bart: And, he said if we went to the cops, he'd come back for Maggie.
- Marge: [gasps] Oh, dear! We don't want that!
- Homer: Any who, the whole nightmare has really made us sleepy. Let's hit the hay.
- Bart: Why are we still grifting? The car's paid for; doesn't that balance out the universe?
- Homer: In a way, but I also remembered some other stuff, like my bike that was stolen in third grade. Plus the baldness.
- Bart: Okay, I'm sold.
- Lisa: I don't know, Mom, I think they're up to something.
- Marge: Sure looks that way, but at least Bart and Homer are spending quality time together.
- Lisa: It that a Long Island iced tea?
- Marge: Oh, this? Hmm, I think it is! [drinks it] You're a pretty girl. [pats Lisa's face]