Oh, Streetcar!

Oh, Streetcar! is a musical version of Tennessee Williams' play A Streetcar Named Desire and was performed and produced in Springfield.

The Cast

• Chief Clancy Wiggum - Narrator
• Marge Simpson - Blanche DuBois
• Apu Nahasapeemapetilon - Steve, the Paperboy
• Ned Flanders - Stanley Kowalski

Songs

Intro

Llewellyn Sinclair:

Perhaps we're all a little mad, we who don the cap and bells and tread beneath the proscenium arch. But tonight, you will all be transformed from dead-eyed suburbanites into white hot grease fires of pure entertainment!!! Except you, you're not working out, I'll be playing your part.

Otto Mann:

Drag.

Long Before the Superdome

Chief Wiggum:

Long before the Superdome,

Where the Saints of football play,

Lived a city that the damned call home.

Hear their hellish roundelay...

New Orleans

Ensemble:

New Or-le-ans,

Home of pirates, drunks, and whores,

New Or-le-ans,

Tacky overpriced souvenir stores.

If you want to go to Hell, you should take a trip

To the Sodom and Gomorra on the Mississip.

New Or-le-ans,

Stinky, rotten, vomiting, vile,

New Or-le-ans,

Putrid, brackish, maggoty, foul.

New Or-le-ans,

Crummy, lousy, rancid, and rank,

New Or-le-ans.

I Though My Life Would Be a Mardi Gras

Woman:

What's the matter, honey, are you lost?

Marge:

I'm lookin' for ma sister, Stella.

Lisa:

It's mom!

Homer:

Huh?

Marge:

Ma name is Blanche DuBois.

I thought my life would be a Mardi Gras,

A neverending party...

Ha!

I'm a faded southern dame

Without a dime.

I am Just a Simple Paper Boy

Apu:

I'm collecting for The Evening Star.

Marge:

Come here, I wanna kiss you just once, softly and sweetly on your mouth.

Apu:

I am just a simple paper boy,

No romance do I seek.

I just wanted forty cents

For my deliveries last week.

Will this bewitching floozy

Seduce this humble newsie?

Oh, what's a a paper to...do?

(she kisses him)

Woo-hoo!

Stella!

Ned Flanders:

STELLA!!!

STELLA!!!

Can't you hear me yell-a?

You're puttin' me through Hell-a?

Stella, STELLA!!!!

She Flies

(instrumental)

The Kindness of Strangers

Marge:

Whoever you are, I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.

Ensemble:

You can always depend on the kindness of strangers

To pluck up your spirits and shield you from dangers.

Marge:

Now here's a tip from Blanche you won't regret.

Cast:

A stranger's just a friend you haven't met!

You haven't met!

STREETCAR!

Behind the Scenes

The songs for the show were composed by Alf Clausen and written by Jeff Martin. The song "New Orleans" gained a lot of controversy because of its lyrics portraying the city in a bad light. In response, in the following episode, Bart wrote on the chalkboard, "I will not defame New Orleans" as an apology.

Appearance

Episode – "A Streetcar Named Marge"