Ring-a-Ding Springfield/Quotes

Quotes

Chief Wiggum: Venetian who? Listen, buddy, can I put you on hold for a sec? I'm on the other line... Otto, I'm putting the terrorist back on the line! Whatever you do, do not let the bus drop below 50 miles per hour, or it'll explode!

Otto Mann: This is not what I meant when I said I wanted to get bombed this morning!

Ralph Wiggum: Daddy, why is the bus going so fast?

Chief Wiggum: Uh... Otto's racing the other buses to see who can get you kids to school the quickest!

Ralph: What happens when there's no more road?

Chief Wiggum: Don't worry, Ralphie, that could never happen.

Otto: Uh, actually, fuzzmeister, the little dude's on to something...

Ned Flanders: Hello? God, is it you?

Fat Tony: So we're goin' biblical with the code names now, 'zat it? Okay, I'll play along—this is God calling to tell you that you are late with your tithe payment.

Ned: Uh.... I think you might have the wrong numberino there, omnipotent one!

Fat Tony: Unless you'd like a little "disco inferno" at your night club, you'd better pass us the collection plate immediately!

Ned: Uh, can I just put you on hold for a sec?

Moe Szyslak: So, you need mo' of Moe... eh baby? Hahahaha! Get it? Mo' of Moe! Seriously, you wanna get married? 'cause If you ain't afraid of a man with chronic psoriasis and a manageable B.O. condition, then let's take the plunge!

Bart: Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Moe: What's so funny? Oh great, you can hear how ugly I am, can't you?

Bart: Man, that prank call was too easy! HE made a jerk of himself before I could even say anything!

Professor Frink: I've finally invented a phone that can call alternate universes! Greetings, oh, mighty peer of parallel-attitude [NNG-HEY!] tell me, how is your universe different from mine? What makes it special?

Apu: Special? Well, for a limited time we are offering the Kwik-E Combo... a 72-ounce Squishee, A Kwik-E corn dog, and a dirty magazine of your choosing for only $9.99 plus tax!

Professor Frink: Kwik-E combo?! You're not from an alternate universe, are you?

Apu: Sir, you have obviously not been to Calcutta.

Professor Frink: What's the use? MY phone is a flop!

Cletus Spuckler: Are you sayin' ifn'n I buy this here "science phone," I can talk to astronauts and aliens?

Nelson Muntz: Yeah, sure, whatever! IT's twenty bucks, take it or leave it.

Cletus: I don't know... how come it ain't in a box or got no storybook that shows you how to use it?

Nelson: Er, ah, there they are!

Nelson: Because it talks to you and tells you how to use it, all right?!

Mayor Quimby: Those are the thugs that stole my cell phone!

Nelson: Uh-oh!

Cletus: Hey, what about my telly-phone?

Nelson: Run for it!