Difference between revisions of "Yet Another Unique Tech Startup Opportunity"

Revision as of 12:47, July 14, 2025

Yet Another Unique Tech Startup Opportunity

Tapped Out Quest Information Level: 5 Update: Hell on Wheels Required characters: Antoine and Zora, Homer Optional characters: Squeaky Voice Teen Internal name(s): YetAnotherUniqueTechStartupOpportunity ID(s): 255037 - 255040

Yet Another Unique Tech Startup Opportunity is a premium questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Hell on Wheels content update. It requires Antoine and Zora to be obtained.

Dialogue

Pt. 1

After tapping on Antoine and Zora's exclamation mark I come bearing good news, fellow Co-CEO! You don't need to say "Co-CEO". Just "CEO" is fine. "Fellow" already implies that we're both CEOs. *under breath* English majors make the worst tech execs. What was that? Anyway, we've got a new round of angel investment so CarGo can proceed with its expansion plans! You mean your parents' friends ponied up another round of cash? *under breath* Just the worst. What was that? Task: "Make Antoine and Zora Plan Company Expansion". The job takes place at CarGo and takes 4 hours. If we expand our manufacturing capacity by 8% we should have enough money left over to hire the salespeople we need to hit our distribution goals. But we won't be able to maintain our requirement of having a food cart every fifty feet on our corporate campus. Well, we could hire 25% of the salespeople on commission and change the requirement to every sixty feet. Would that work? *looks at fingernails* I minored in statistics. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 2

After tapping on Antoine and Zora's exclamation mark Thank you for interviewing with us. It's an entry level admin position, with other duties as assigned to support the senior staff. So, I'll have to make coffee runs even though you have one of those fancy European coffee makers every sixty feet or so. Got it. Yes. The ability to multitask is going to be very important in this position. Understood. So I'll be doing the work of three people while getting paid half of what one should make; work too few hours to be considered full time... ...and, once I do qualify for benefits, you'll replace me. You seem to have a lot of insight into the job-hiring process. Did you look at my resume? It's twenty-four pages long. I tuned out after a while. Task: "Make Antoine and Zora Marvel at Epic Resume". The job takes place at CarGo and takes 4 hours. If Squeaky Voice Teen is owned: Task: "Make Squeaky Voice Teen Recall His Many, Many Jobs". The job takes place at CarGo and takes 4 hours. I've never met anyone who's worked so many different jobs before. Sometimes it feels like I'm in purgatory, forced to work a series of random service industry jobs at the behest of a pantheon of devious gods who think they're more clever than they actually are. Uh-huh. How soon can you start? Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 3

After tapping on Antoine and Zora's exclamation mark We're very excited to be talking to you about one of our "code ninja" positions! "Code ninja". Is that supposed to make me happy to be programming eighty hours a week without getting paid overtime? You do get paid over time! Did...did you say overtime or over-pause-time? You're a good listener. I like that in a candidate. NEXT! Are you prepared to work in a dynamic work environment? Meaning that you keep changing priorities as soon as you see something new and shiny on the Tech News Network. That's insightful. I like that in a candidate. NEXT! What do you think you can contribute to an agile development team? Do you realize your use of the word agile is—? NEXT! Task: "Make Antoine and Zora Read "Hiring for Dum-Dums"". The job takes place at CarGo and takes 4 hours. This is stupid! We're already doing everything the book says. I have a great idea. Two words: Travel mugs! For us? We put our logo on them and give them to new hires. *thinking* And for us. That's brilliant! Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 4

After tapping on Antoine and Zora's exclamation mark Can we help you? Yes, I am here to apply for a job. We're a hi-tech automotive startup. I don't think— Yes, and I am the CEO of Compu-Global-Hyper-Mega-Net. We're a cutting-edge internet company that does internet things that make a lot of money. Uh, one moment, sir. I need to step outside and speak with my fellow Co-CEO. Indeed. And I will partake in these tech company snacks that seem ten feet further apart than normal. What's wrong? Don't you get it? He's an undercover boss! *gasp* How did I not see it? He's dressed like a complete slob! Wait, but we don't have bosses. We ARE the bosses. He's not our boss. He's the boss of Compu-Global-Hyper-Mega-Net and he's who's gonna try a hostile takeover on us. He's clearly undercover and scoping us out. But...if he was undercover, why would he tell the truth about being the CEO of Compu-Global-Hyper-Mega-Net? That's how deep undercover he is! Oof, this takeover is gonna get hostile. Task: "Make Antoine and Zora Panic About a Hostile Takeover". The job takes place at CarGo and takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Homer Begrudgingly Walk an Extra Ten Feet". The job takes place at [{CarGo]] and takes 4 hours. Sir, we appreciate you coming down here to check out our operation, but really, CarGo is such a small operation, I'm sure, compared to Compu-Global-Hyper-Net— Compu-Global-Hyper-MEGA-Net! Right, that. Really, it wouldn't be worth your time to even consider us. But we were wondering if maybe there was something we could do for you, so that you would could just...go away and...forget about anything hostile.... What did you have in mind? How does two-thousand CarGo stock options sound? What about one of those travel mugs you give to new hires? Deal! Quest reward: 200 and 20