Some Enchanted Evening/Quotes
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< Some Enchanted Evening
Revision as of 07:36, May 6, 2012 by WebkinzMania (talk | contribs)
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- Marge: Hello, I'd like to talk to Dr. Monroe
- Receptionist: First name, age, problem?
- Marge: I'm Marge, 34, and my problem's my husband. He doesn't listen to me, he doesn't appreciate me, I don't know how much longer I can...
- Receptionist:: Hey lady, save your whining for when you're on the air, okay?
- Marvin: And if he doesn't start loving, you will be leaving
- Marge: Leave Homer?
- Marvin: Please, don't use his real name!
- Marge: Leave Paidrel?
- Marvin: Can you be that honest Marge?
- Marge: Yeah!
- Marvin: You'll tell him right when he comes home from work
- Marge: Yeah!
- Marvin: Say it like you mean it...
- Marge: YEAH!
- Moe: Homer, Marge is right, you are a pig! You can ask anyone in this bar!
- Homer: What!? Hey Barney, am I a pig?
- Barney: You're even more of a pig than I am *burp*
- Moe: See, you're a pig. Barney's a pig, Larry's a pig, we're all pigs!
- [Bart prank calls Moe's Tavern]
- Moe: Moe's Tavern.
- Bart: Is Oliver there?
- Moe: Who?
- Bart: Oliver Klozoff.
- Moe: Hold on. I'll check. Oliver Klozoff! Call for Oliver Klozoff!
- [Bart and Lisa bust out in laughter. Marge picks up the phone]
- Moe: Listen, you nosey bum. If I ever get a hold of you, I swear I'll cut your belly open!
- Marge: Goodness! Must be a crossed wire.
- Homer: And, I made reservations at Chez Paree.
- Marge: [gasps] But, Homer, it's so expensive!
- Homer: It matters not, mon frere.
- [Marge picks up the phone again and dials the babysitting service]
- Receptionist: Rubber Baby Buggie Bumper Babysitting Service.
- Marge: This is Marge Simpson, I'd like a babysitter for the evening.
- Receptionist: Wait a minute. The Simpsons?
- [Looks over at a bulletin board with Bart, Lisa and Maggie, with the words "NO! NO! NO!" on it.]
- Receptionist: Lady you've got to be kidding!
- [Receptionist slams the phone and continues writing, phone rings seconds later]
- Receptionist: Rubber baby buggie bumper babysitting service.
- Homer: Hello, this is Mr. Ssssamson.
- Receptionist: Did your wife just call a second ago?
- Homer: No, I said Samson, not Simpson.
- Receptionist: Thank God! Those Simpsons, what a bunch of savages! Especially that big ape father.
- Homer: [angrily] D'oh! Actually the Simpsons are neighbors of ours and we found them to be a quite misunderstood and underrated family.
- Moe: Phone call for Al. Al Caholic. Is there an Al Caholic here?
- Marge: The way I see it, if you raise three children who can knock out and hog-tie a perfect stranger, you must be doing something right.
- Ms. Botz: Your parents left me this for you to watch. [holds up The Happy Little Elves]
- Lisa: Oh, boy! The Happy Little Elves!
- Bart: Yo, lady, we've seen the Crappy Little Elves about 14 million times! Maybe we can watch some real TV!
- Ms Botz: I said we're gonna watch the tape!
- Bart: Awww.. thats merely a suggested viewing matter, lady, mom lets us watch whatever the hell we want.
- Ms. Botz: You're going to watch this tape, and you're going to do what I say or I'm going to do something to you. And I don't know what that is because everyone has always done what I say!
- Homer: They all look so tasty, but I think I'll eat that one right there.
- Maitre D': Why don't you pick one that's a little more frisky, sir?
- Homer: Why?
- Maitre D': Well, when you choose one that's floating upside down, it somewhat defeats the purpose of selecting a live lobster.
- Lisa: But I wanna see what happens!
- Bart: You know what happens! They find Captain Cook's treasure, all the elves jump around like little green idiots, I puke, the end!
- [Bart and Lisa watch America's Most Armed and Dangerous on the television.]
- Host: The Cue Ball Killer should be considered extremely armed and dangerous. If you think you've seen him, call 1-800-U-SQUEAL.
- [Ms. Botz has Bart and Lisa tied up on the couch].
- Bart: We know who you are, Ms. Botz. Or should I say, Ms. Botzcowski. You're the Baby-sitter Bandit!
- Ms. Botz: You're a smart, young man, Bart. I hope you're smart enough to keep your mouth shut.
- Lisa: He isn't.
- Homer: Ms. Botz? Good lord! What have those little hellions done now!? We're so sorry, we're so sorry!
- Ms Botz: Please turn off the TV.
- [Marge and Homer finish watching Homer’s interview about the "Baby-sitter Bandit" on the news.]
- Homer: Lord, help me. I'm just not that bright.
- Marge: Oh, Homer, don't say that. The way I see it, if you raise three children who can knock out and hogtie a perfect stranger, you must be doing something right.
