Comedic and Unusual Punishment
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Tapped Out Quest Information
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Comedic and Unusual Punishment is a premium questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Itchy & Scratchy Land content update. It requires Corporal Punishment to be obtained.
Dialogue
Pt. 1
After tapping on Krusty's exclamation mark
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SIR! YOU WANTED TO SEE ME, SIR?
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Corporal, I like you. You work cheap.
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More importantly, you don't seem to REALIZE you work cheap. I want you to be my new sidekick.
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WOULD THE CLOWN LIKE ME TO “ELIMINATE” SIDESHOW MEL?
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Ew, no.
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Not yet, anyway. Maybe later. Almost certainly later. Anyway, let's see a smile there, soldier.
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Task: "Make Corporal Punishment Struggle to Smile". The job takes place at Krustylu Studios or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Oh God, that was horrifying!
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Why did I hear creaking and popping noises when you tried to smile?
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SIR, I HAVE NEVER USED MY SMILING MUSCLES BEFORE, SIR!
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Can we turn down the volume, please?
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Sir, yes, sir.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 2
After tapping on Krusty's exclamation mark
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You've obviously forgotten what it's like to be a kid. Let's practice. Play with these hand puppets.
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How shall I play with the puppets, sir?
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Just make up a scene: a tea party, a ball game, or a silly cowboy adventure!
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Making up scene now, sir.
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“Captain Puppet, sir! The Nazis have broken through our lines! They're using some kind of chemical weapon!”
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“It's eating my skin! Auugghh! Auuugghhhh! Make it stop, make it stop, make it stop!”
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...
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Task: "Make Corporal Punishment Play With Hand Puppets". The job takes 4 hours.
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“Dead. All dead. These men were the only family I've ever known, and those Nazi SCUM took them from me.”
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“I want BLOOD.”
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Am I playing with puppets correctly, sir?
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Sure. The kids in my audience love stories about the horror and futility of war.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 3
After tapping on Krusty's exclamation mark
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I'll make you an entertainer yet, Corporal. Let's try some stand-up comedy.
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Every great stand-up has a funny stage persona. What do you think your persona should be?
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Humorless giant who considers comedy a waste of time?
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Well, I haven't seen it before…
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Task: "Make Corporal Punishment Practice Stand-up Comedy". The job takes place at Krustylu Studios or a Brown House and takes 8 hours.
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I gotta tell ya, the fastest way to clear a village of armed insurgents is to ask them to take a BATH.
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That, or call in a coordinated strike of Boeing AH-64 Apache ATTACK HELICOPTERS.
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Ughhhhh…
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 4
After tapping on Krusty's exclamation mark
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You're the worst stand-up I've ever seen. You've got no talent, no material, and no timing.
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As far as I can see, there's no aspect of entertainment you do well.
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Which makes you the perfect clown. Trust me on this.
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Task: "Make Corporal Punishment Try to Clown Around". The job takes 8 hours.
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Clowning mission successful, commander. All japes and gags present and accounted for.
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Actually, that was pretty good. Which makes you a threat to me.
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If you ever pick up a pie again, you're fired.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 5
After tapping on Krusty's exclamation mark
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I've got it! You're not funny, Corporal, but you ARE funny-looking.
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Sir, thank you, sir!
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Imagine a hunk of vibranium like you petting an adorable little kitten, and saying: “I wuv my wittle kitty.” It'll kill!
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My mission is to kill a kitten?
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No, that's probably a downer. Let's try it first without the killing.
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Task: "Make Corporal Punishment Cuddle a Kitten". The job takes place at Krustylu Studios or a Brown House and takes 2 hours.
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I wuv my wittle kitty.
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Aww, the kids love you! I'm a genius!
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When do I terminate the kitten?
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Never! Never kill a bit that's working. Just keep doing it over and over, for years, and years, and years…
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Quest reward: 200 and 20
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