Springfield Elementary Poetry Competition/Quotes
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- Principal Skinner: Children, children! Let's get this show on the road! I can only hope it will be better than last semester's poetry competition. And as the student's recite their repertoire, I'm sure I need not mention, if you're all not on your best behavior, you're sure to bet detention! Heh, well, what do you know? That rhymed. Anyway our first contestant is Ralph Wiggum.
- Ralph Wiggum: The Rock is my favorite wrestler. He's got big muscles and puts oil all over his chest and hits people with chairs. I love The Rock!
- Principal Skinner: "The person I most admire" was last week's assignment, Ralph. Get off the stage. [SIGH!] I can already see where this is headings next!
- Ralph: My favorite flavor is red.
- Nelson Muntz: She ran naked through the hill - side woods.
- Principal Skinner: Next contestant, please!
- Nelson: Huh? Wait a minute. I put a lot of work into this! It's a complex piece about the machinations of love and family!
- Principal Skinner: I'll talk to you later, Mr. Potty Mouth!
- Lisa: I sing of Springfield, glad and big, tool, maker, stacker of wheat, it's birds rising up to the sky. Only to drink from the tormented river singing daily, then dressed in black!
- Principal Skinner: Oh, my! This is getting worse and worse next!
- Bart: There once was a boy who was smart...
- Principal Skinner: No ribald limericks out of you, Simpson! All right, that's enough of this judges, let's get the nightmare over.
- Martin Prince: But what about my "Ode to Raisin Roundees"?
- Jasper Beardsley: We liked that detention thing you win, Skinner!
- Principal Skinner: Well, I don't know what to say! They like me, mother! They really like me!
