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Get off the Bus!/Quotes

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki



Sideshow Bob: These buses are pathetic! They're simply a microcosm of how our government neglects the safety and well-being of today's youngsters. Look at this heap... ...Primitive controls... ...weak structural integrity... ...and the holy queen mother of all sins, the absence of proper safety restrains... ...Seat belts! I remember the days before seat belts were invented...

Edna Krabappel: Now, did everyone remember to bring their bathing suits?
Bart: I forgot my bathing suit, but I brought my birthday suit!

Sideshow Bob: [on the phone] You don't understand. I'm calling to warn you about your school buses. If they are not immediately equipped with the proper safety features, someone is going to get seriously injured.
Principal Skinner: [on the phone] Listen, you commie, bleeding heart activist, those buses have been running fine since 1936. If you think I'm going to take money from the school's precious transportation-faculty snack fund, you're nuts!

Sideshow Bob: [on phone] This is your friendly martyr calling. Since you ignored my earlier request, let it be known that I have rigged the bus destined for the water park for destruction! Once this bus attains the speed of 55 mph, any sudden stop will set off my little contraption and that bus's next destination will be...
Answering machine: [CLICK] Your message has exceeded the time allotted. Good-bye.

Bart: Otto, don't go over 55!
Otto Mann: Huh> Blow you a chive?
Bart: I said don't go over 55!!
Otto: My Aunt Flo and Uncle Clive?
Bart: No! Don't go over 55!!!
Otto: Ohhh. Don't slow down when I drive! Okay! Thanks for the tip, Bart-Dude!

Bart: Otto, man, someone's rigged this bus with a bomb! If you go under 55 mph the bus will blow!
Otto: Cool!
Bart: Ordinarily, I would agree with you, but in this case... we could all die!

Lisa: Don't worry, I can drive! I do this every time dad gets his hand stuck in the 8-track tape player.

Chief Wiggum: A 563!! Get the kayaks, boys! We have a tidal wave comin' through!!
Lou: No, a 563 means hooker with a grenade launcher.
Eddie: Isn't 563 the number for the Pu Pu Platter at Wang's Szechuan Cottage?

Otto: Yo, dudes. I just had the most freaked out dream. There was a bomb on the bus and you were there, Bart! And you too, Lisa and... wait, where's that freaky lil' dog?

Bart: Medals, public adoration, amnesty for the being naked in class thing... I could get used to being a hero.