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"Brake My Wife, Please" is the 311th episode of The Simpsons and the twentieth episode of Season 14. It originally aired on May 11, 2003. It was written by Tim Long and directed by Pete Michels. Steve Buscemi, Jackson Browne and Jane Kaczmarek guest-starred as himself, himself and Judge Constance Harm, respectively.

Homer has a car accident and loses his driver's license, which means that Marge now has to do all of the family's driving. Homer comes to enjoy walking instead of driving, but the extra responsibility stresses out Marge. She becomes increasingly accident-prone (starting with running over Homer in the car), and Homer is on the receiving end of all of her accidents. This puts a strain on their relationship, but a visit to a marriage counselor sorts everything out.

During a school field trip to Springfield Aquarium, Principal Skinner spots some unusually large pearls in a giant clam. The "pearls", however, turn out to be Bart mooning everyone. After pulling the prank, Bart tries to get out of the water, but in short order is grabbed by an octopus, punched in the stomach by a sea turtle and pounded on the head by a hammerhead shark. Following the aquatic assault, Bart goes to the hospital to have his injuries treated...