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Squidport
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
- For the location, see Springfield Squidport.
Squidport
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Tapped Out Quest Information
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Squidport is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Squidport content update. The questline unlocks the Springfield Squidport and several characters, buildings and decorations to go with it.
Dialogue
Pt. 1
After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
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D'oh!
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What's wrong, Dad?
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Oh, that wasn't an annoyed "d'oh" -- I was just thinking about "dough".
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Like the delicious fried dough they used to sell down at the waterfront.
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Get in the car, kids! We're going to the Squidport!
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Dad, remember? You blew up the town. There is no Squidport.
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D'oh!
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That one was an annoyed d'oh.
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I suppose we could rebuild the Squidport. It'd be nice to see our town finally stretch down to the water.
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Get in the car, kids! We're going to rebuild the Squidport!
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Nobody "gets in cars" anymore. We all just walk around aimlessly on the streets.
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D'oh!
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Which kind was that?
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Little of both.
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Tasks: "Have Beach Expansion" and "Have Water Expansion".
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 2
After completing Pt. 1
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Okay, water expansion bought!
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...and it was surprisingly easy considering it's prime oceanfront property and all my money is fake.
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Great! Now we can build the Squidport Entrance.
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You know what they say: "Every great building begins with the door!"
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Who says that?
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I dunno, building builders, I assume.
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Task: "Place Squidport Entrance".
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So I've bought the Squidport Entrance, and I should place it... um...
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On the waterfront.
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Yes! Yes, exactly... and I would find that... er...
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In front of the water.
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I know that. I'm not totally incompetent.
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The water is the blue part, right?
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Just put it in the shaded area.
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Place: Squidport Entrance
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If the player tries to place it somewhere else:
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Message
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Please place the Squidport in the shaded area, and stop being dumb on purpose.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 3
After completing Pt. 2
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Mmm, fried dough. A plate-sized glob of wet flour, deep fried and covered with whipped cream... Ow! Chest pains!
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I need to exercise. By walking a short distance along the boardwalk to get to the Fried Dough Stand.
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Task: "Place Boardwalk Sections".
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Message
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Place the boardwalk section and drag to create a boardwalk.
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If the player tries to place it somewhere else:
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Message
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Shaded. Area. Don't make me turn this game around!
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 4
After completing Pt. 3
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Ah, the Squidport! Full of charming junkies and colorful runaways, attracted by the smell of carnival food and shady merchants...
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Wait a minute! My Squidport doesn't have any of that!
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Dad? Is something wrong?
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No, Sweetie. Daddy just has to have a talk with some of his real estate partners.
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STUPID WATERFRONT! EMBARRASS ME IN FRONT OF THE JUNKIES AND RUNAWAYS!
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Task: "Make Homer Swear at the Ocean". The task takes place at the Squidport Entrance and takes 12 hours.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 5
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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Y'arr, the Squidport! This old seadog has spent many a silver here, having me caricature made and eating Dipping Dots.
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Tho something's different now, can't lay a finger to it.
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Wait, I have it -- it's become totally lame.
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I know, right? You can't buy a fried anything or squoosh a penny into a worthless flat oval.
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Me men'll get this place into ship-shape. The finest builders what sailed the seas!
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It makes sense that sailors would know carpentry. They have to constantly repair the ship.
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Aye. We'll start by building a logo store to increase footfalls and up the spill-over effect.
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Okay, now it's making less sense.
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Sailors must also be well versed in mall-science and neuromarketing.
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Task: "Build the Itchy & Scratchy Store". It takes 3 hours.
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Build: The Itchy and Scratchy Store
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After select the building
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Squidport buildings can only be placed on the boardwalk, ye land-lubbers!
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Yeah, build on the boardwalk, Land-lubbers! If you lub land so much, why don't you marry it?
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Y'arr, Homer, don't help.
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If the player doesn't place it on the boardwalk
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ou have to put Squidport buildings on the boardwalk, or the pirate guy will get mad!
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Pirate?! Aarg, I should keelhaul the lot of ye!
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If the player doesn't place it in the shaded area
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Dash my buttons! Build in the shaded area, or I'll run you up the mast and let the gulls have at ye!
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 6
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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T'is a start, but a short boardwalk is like a peg-leg dancing girl. If she's right there, you'll look at 'er, but enh. Ye need to build more Boardwalk.
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How do we do that? I mean, I know... but explain it slowly for the people who aren't as smart as me am.
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Head ye over to the Squidport Entrance and then, er... I don't know, just build it.
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Task: "Build a Boardwalk Section at the Squidport Entrance".
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And ye can always speed the work along with donuts!
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What a surprise.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 7
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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Little girl, I need some supplies, where can an old salt get hands on rope and tarps?
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Are you going out to sea again?
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Nay, I'm going to an Adele concert and wanted to unfurl a sign that says I heart her. I've got bad seats so it has to be a big one.
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Well, the boardwalk used to have a place that sold camping supplies.
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And it shall again. Fall on, men -- the cheap seats await!
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Tasks: "Have Boardwalk Sections x8" and "Build Malaria Zone". It takes 3 hours.
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Build: Malaria Zone
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 8
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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Y'arr! The boardwalk is coming 'round nicely, but still there's something missing.
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Mr. Captain, sir? If I could offer a suggestion... a spruce or two could really, well, spruce things up!
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That's it exactly, matey! You gay men always have the best design advice.
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Oh, I'm not a homosexual.
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Neither am I, wink-wink! Now let's get to decorating, girlfriend!
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Tasks: "Have Boardwalk Lampost", "Have Boardwalk Trees" (x3) and "Have Boardwalk Fences" (x5).
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 9
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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Y'arr! I've learned a thing or three in me travels. Things I'd like ta share with the good folk o' Springfield.
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Mayhaps a cultural imports store.
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It's so wonderful that you want to expose people to the crafts and cultures of distant peoples!
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N'arr, I jest want to fleece tourists the way the locals fleeced me everywhere I went.
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Maybe unload some tribal gew-gaws I got conned inta buying.
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Tasks: "Have Boardwalk Sections" (x12) and "Build Just Rainsticks". It takes 3 hours.
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Build: Just Rainsticks
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 10
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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...and I said, "That's as useful as a tall powder monkey!"
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I don't get it.
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If he was tall, he couldn't fit in the gunwale which would be hilarious because... aw, forget it!
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My quality sea-comedy's too good for the likes of you. Ye can amuse yerself with the low-rent antics of boardwalk street performers.
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Task: "Have a Street Performer". The player has to purchase one of the Boardwalk Performers.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 11
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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Now this is a boardwalk on which Ahab himself would be proud to play skeeball.
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The Squidport is finally ready for the placement of its crowning jewel.
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Jewels? You're going to share your ill-gotten treasure booty with us!
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Stop calling me a pirate! I meant a metaphorical jewel. Something that will really make the Squidport shine.
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A fried dough stand?
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Better than that.
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An Antique Book Store?
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Better than that.
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A hundred foot tall climbing wall that you parachute down from?
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Well okay, not as good as that.
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Tasks: "Have Boardwalk Sections" (x16) and "Build the Frying Dutchman". It takes 4 hours.
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Build: The Frying Dutchman
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 12
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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Homer, I'm beggin' ye. What can I do to have you turn your mighty eatin' power elsewhere?
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Well, the only reason I even came down to the waterfront was to get some fried dough.
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That's it? That's all we have ta do? Yee-haw! I mean... I don't know, whatever sailors say when they're happy.
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Task: "Have Boardwalk Sections" (x17) and "Build a Fried Dough Stand".
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Place: Fried Dough Stand
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There, take it! Eat ye vast yellow whale! Eat yer fried dough! Eat like the great sucking whirlpool you are!
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Hmm, you know what's funny? I'm not hungry anymore. I'm feeling kind of nappish.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 13
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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Poseidon and Neptune have decided they will only be appeased if we build more random stores on the boardwalk.
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I know, I was as surprised as you. Gods, huh? Who can figure 'em out?
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Tasks: "Have Boardwalk Sections" (x21) and "Reach Level 16 and Build Turban Outfitters". It take 4 hours.
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Build: Turban Outfitters
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 14
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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Y'arr, salty air and sand have caused me tattoos to fade. That and the obsessive hand washing brought on by me OCD.
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Time I go in for some fresh ink!
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Tasks: "Have Boardwalk Sections" (x25) and "Reach Level 17 and Build My First Tattoo". It take 4 hours.
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Build: My First Tattoo
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 15
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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Mr. Sea Captain? As much as I love your quaint restaurant, there really aren't many breakfast options.
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What are ye talking about? The swim bladder of a kipper is a breakfast delicacy on Norwegian prison ships.
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Be that as it may, I think vegetarians would prefer, pretty much anything else. How about muffins?
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Vegetarians? Preachy blowhards! But I suppose their money's green enough. Let's build your Muffin shop!
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Tasks: "Have Boardwalk Sections" (x27) and "Reach Level 18 and Build Much Ado About Muffins". It takes 4 hours.
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Build: Much Ado About Muffins
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 16
After tapping on Sea Captain's exclamation mark
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The gods have seen that our hearts are true and that we are trying to please them.
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Still, they want us to build a store whose name doesn't, in any way, explain what kind of products the store sells. They were that specific.
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Tasks: "Have Boardwalk Sections" (x31) and "Reach Level 19 and Build Crypto Barn". It takes 4 hours.
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Build: Crypto Barn
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Y'arr, let the bells ring out! The Sea Gods have accepted our offering! The oceans are once again roiling with bountiful sea life. And we are killing it as fast as we can.
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And best of all, my restaurant is turning a moderate profit, all thanks to my renewed humility and mindfulness.
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And the sign I put over the door: "No Fatties!"
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D'oh!
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Behind the Laughter
The following dialogue was cut from the update.
Once a Kid, Always a Kid
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What are all these holes in the sidewalk?
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Hmm, there's a sign. "Caution: Fountain is slippery when wet."
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Well obviously, all fountains are slippery when wet. Luckily there's no fountains anywhere aroun--- *thump*
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Task: Make Homer Dodge the Water Jets.
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