Difference between revisions of "Your Horrorscope"
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|image=[[File:Your Horroscope.png|250px]] | |image=[[File:Your Horroscope.png|250px]] | ||
|released= April [[2014]] | |released= April [[2014]] | ||
| − | |pages= | + | |pages= 2 |
|series= ''[[Simpsons Comics]]'' | |series= ''[[Simpsons Comics]]'' | ||
|written by= [[Mike Kazaleh]] | |written by= [[Mike Kazaleh]] | ||
| Line 11: | Line 11: | ||
'''''Your Horrorscope''''' is a horoscope first printed in {{SC|211}}. | '''''Your Horrorscope''''' is a horoscope first printed in {{SC|211}}. | ||
| − | == Horrorscope== | + | == Horrorscope == |
{{Table| | {{Table| | ||
{{TH|Image|width=150px}} | {{TH|Image|width=150px}} | ||
| − | {{TH| | + | {{TH|Sign<br>Duration|width=150px}} |
{{TH|Horroscope}} | {{TH|Horroscope}} | ||
{{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Aquarius.png|200px]]}} | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Aquarius.png|200px]]}} | ||
| − | {{TB|'''Aquarius'''}} | + | {{TB|'''Aquarius'''<br>(4:00pm–6:00pm)}} |
| − | {{TB|Bringer of jollity. Spirits are lifted when you are near. Warm and compassionate, other people often bring their troubles to you.<br>'''This week:''' Mars and several dozen other planets will enter your house. Be sure to spread your own brand of happiness. It will prove to be very rewarding.}} | + | {{TB|Bringer of jollity. Spirits are lifted when you are near. Warm and compassionate, other people often bring their troubles to you.<br>'''This week:''' [[Mars]] and several dozen other planets will enter your house. Be sure to spread your own brand of happiness. It will prove to be very rewarding.}} |
{{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Pisces.png|200px]]}} | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Pisces.png|200px]]}} | ||
| − | {{TB|'''Pisces'''}} | + | {{TB|'''Pisces'''<br>(Nine–Five)}} |
| − | {{TB|You | + | {{TB|You possess a high level of intelligence, although that may be difficult for others to perceive. Your relationship can be a bit of an enigma at times.<br>'''This week:''' The Moon is a little wobbly in its orbit. Your situation is stable and yet unpredictable. Look to Aquarius to find real satisfaction.}} |
{{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Aries.png|200px]]}} | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Aries.png|200px]]}} | ||
| − | {{TB|'''Aries'''}} | + | {{TB|'''Aries'''<br>([[Edinburgh]]–[[Glasgow]])}} |
| − | {{TB|You tend to be called upon to clean up problems caused by others. You do this with great fortitude and tenacity.<br>'''This week:''' Jupiter is in your house today, and that means there will be plenty of extra mopping up to do. Libra may have brought about this | + | {{TB|You tend to be called upon to clean up problems caused by others. You do this with great fortitude and tenacity.<br>'''This week:''' {{ap|Jupiter|planet}} is in your house today, and that means there will be plenty of extra mopping up to do. Libra may have brought about this situation.}} |
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{{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Taurus.png|200px]]}} | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Taurus.png|200px]]}} | ||
| − | {{TB|'''Taurus'''}} | + | {{TB|'''Taurus'''<br>(Coffee Break–Coffee Break)}} |
{{TB|A tireless protector of the people, you have devoted your life to righting the wrongs of society. Once in a great while you actually do something useful.<br>'''This week:''' Though some of the sweeter things in life may prove to be a distraction, try to keep your mind focused on your daily pursuits.}} | {{TB|A tireless protector of the people, you have devoted your life to righting the wrongs of society. Once in a great while you actually do something useful.<br>'''This week:''' Though some of the sweeter things in life may prove to be a distraction, try to keep your mind focused on your daily pursuits.}} | ||
{{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Gemini.png|200px]]}} | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Gemini.png|200px]]}} | ||
| − | {{TB|'''Gemini'''}} | + | {{TB|'''Gemini'''<br>(June 1st –May 31st)}} |
{{TB|You are fiercely protective of the ones you love, much to their eternal distress. Children respect you and keep their distance.<br>'''This week:''' Romance is not in the stars this week. Nor next week. Or the week after that. Maybe you should find a hobby instead.}} | {{TB|You are fiercely protective of the ones you love, much to their eternal distress. Children respect you and keep their distance.<br>'''This week:''' Romance is not in the stars this week. Nor next week. Or the week after that. Maybe you should find a hobby instead.}} | ||
{{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Cancer.png|200px]]}} | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Cancer.png|200px]]}} | ||
| − | {{TB|'''Cancer'''}} | + | {{TB|'''Cancer'''<br>({{W|Golden Age of Comic Books|Golden Age}}–{{W|Silver Age of Comic Books|Silver Age}})}} |
| − | {{TB|To many you are considered to be the keeper of wisdom from ages past. Young people are drawn to you and look to you for their | + | {{TB|To many you are considered to be the keeper of wisdom from ages past. Young people are drawn to you and look to you for their spiritual needs.<br>'''This week:''' Do not allow sentiment to dilute your finely tuned business sense. If [[God]] had not wanted them sheared, he would not have made them sheep.}} |
| + | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Leo.png|200px]]}} | ||
| + | {{TB|'''Leo''' <br>(Late Afternoon Reruns–National News Feed)}} | ||
| + | {{TB|You are a forceful leader and command respect from all you encounter. Experience may have hardened you, but you still have the ability to make other people feel rotten.<br>'''This week:''' Pluto is in the farthest reaches of the solar system. Early career goals may seem more remote than ever, but there is much to love about your present situation.}} | ||
| + | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Virgo.png|200px]]}} | ||
| + | {{TB|'''Virgo'''<br>(Here–Eternity)}} | ||
| + | {{TB|You are often surrounded by children, but this merely underscores the fact that you have none. The ticking of your biological clock keeps you awake at night.<br>'''This week:'''{{W|Alpha Centauri}} will go retrograde. Expect another relationship to [[Hindenburg disaster|go down like the Hindenburg]]. Sagittarius may be the one you are seeking.}} | ||
| + | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Libra.png|200px]]}} | ||
| + | {{TB|'''Libra'''<br>(September 6th–June 21st)}} | ||
| + | {{TB|You are unflappable despite the great responsibility of your position. You feed the hearts and minds of the children you serve.<br>'''This week:''' Make the best use of the materials available at your workplace if you wish to maintain your situation, no matter how wrong it may seem.}} | ||
{{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Scorpio.png|200px]]}} | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Scorpio.png|200px]]}} | ||
| − | {{TB|'''Scorpio'''}} | + | {{TB|'''Scorpio'''<br>(10 Years)}} |
| − | {{TB| | + | {{TB|Your endeavors often capture the attention of the authorities. This makes you one of the most sought after individuals in your community.<br>'''This week:''' You will be in [[Saturn]]'s house, and Saturn won't like it. Plans may go awry and end up restricting your future activities. Avoid Taurus.}} |
{{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Sagittarius.png|200px]]}} | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Sagittarius.png|200px]]}} | ||
| − | {{TB|'''Sagittarius'''}} | + | {{TB|'''Sagittarius'''<br>(Baptism–Final Reward)}} |
| − | {{TB|Your true spirit is a | + | {{TB|Your true spirit is a mystery to those in your orbit. Friends may consider you to be helpful one day and enormously irritating the next.<br>'''This week:''' [[Uranus]] is in {{ap|Neptune|planet}}'s garage, borrowing his power mower. Be forgiving of others when they repeatedly take advantage of your kind and loving nature.}} |
{{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Capricorn.png|200px]]}} | {{TBT|[[File:Your Horroscope Capricorn.png|200px]]}} | ||
| − | {{TB|'''Capricorn'''}} | + | {{TB|'''Capricorn'''<br>(College–Retirement)}} |
| − | {{TB|Your | + | {{TB|Your obsequiousness has earned you a position of great importance in your town. Always the public servant, you can often be seen assisting the elderly.<br>'''This week:''' Venus will collide with Mercury. This does not bode well for personal relationships. If unrequited love robs you of your rest, get over it.}} |
}} | }} | ||
| + | == External links == | ||
| + | *{{Wikipedialink|Horoscopic astrology}} | ||
{{Images}} | {{Images}} | ||
{{ClearAll}} | {{ClearAll}} | ||
Latest revision as of 14:53, June 23, 2024
Your Horrorscope
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Comic Story information
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Your Horrorscope is a horoscope first printed in Simpsons Comics #211.
Horrorscope[edit]
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External links[edit]
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Wikisimpsons has a collection of images related to Your Horrorscope. |
