Difference between revisions of "Bart vs. Lisa vs. the Third Grade/Quotes"
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(Created page with "{{TabQ |episode=Bart vs. Lisa vs. the Third Grade }} :[While Bart is watching the Clock Channel on TV] :'''TV Announcer''': Coming up on the Clock Channel: 6:00. :'''Bart''': Wa...") |
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− | :[While Bart is watching the Clock Channel on TV] | + | :[While [[Bart]] is watching the [[Clock Channel]] on TV] |
− | :'''TV | + | :'''TV announcer''': Coming up on the Clock Channel: 6:00. |
:'''Bart''': Wait, I already saw this one. | :'''Bart''': Wait, I already saw this one. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Lisa''': Bart, the test is in 2 hours, and you haven't slept in a fortnight! | + | :'''[[Lisa]]''': Bart, the test is in 2 hours, and you haven't slept in a fortnight! |
:'''Bart''': What's a fortnight? | :'''Bart''': What's a fortnight? | ||
:'''Lisa''': You should know, it's on the test! | :'''Lisa''': You should know, it's on the test! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': No pressure, children, but these test results will follow you for the rest of your life and beyond the grave. | + | :'''[[Mrs. Krabappel]]''': No pressure, children, but these test results will follow you for the rest of your life and beyond the grave. |
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Nelson''': Ha ha! | + | :'''[[Nelson]]''': Ha ha! |
− | :'''Mrs. McConnell''': Young man, you're not in this class. What are you doing here? | + | :'''[[Mrs. McConnell]]''': Young man, you're not in this class. What are you doing here? |
:'''Nelson''': Laughing at jerks. | :'''Nelson''': Laughing at jerks. | ||
:[Later on the class field trip] | :[Later on the class field trip] | ||
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:'''Nelson''': Biked. | :'''Nelson''': Biked. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Homer''': Hey, you can't fool us. We're from the "Learn to Fart" state. | + | :'''[[Homer]]''': Hey, you can't fool us. We're from the "Learn to Fart" state. |
---- | ---- | ||
:'''Lisa''': Bart cheated! | :'''Lisa''': Bart cheated! | ||
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:'''Bart''' [while Lisa is doing her homework]: Quiet nerds burp only near school. | :'''Bart''' [while Lisa is doing her homework]: Quiet nerds burp only near school. | ||
:'''Lisa''': Bart, I'm doing my geography homework. | :'''Lisa''': Bart, I'm doing my geography homework. | ||
− | :'''Bart''': I know. That's how you remember the 4 original provinces of Canada. Quebec, New Brunswick, Ontario, Nova Scotia; "Quiet Nerds Burp Only Near School." And here's how you remember the principle exports; "Dogs Eat Barf Only On Wednesday, Mable." | + | :'''Bart''': I know. That's how you remember the 4 original provinces of [[Canada]]. Quebec, New Brunswick, Ontario, Nova Scotia; "Quiet Nerds Burp Only Near School." And here's how you remember the principle exports; "Dogs Eat Barf Only On Wednesday, Mable." |
:'''Lisa''': Stop! I want to learn on my own. | :'''Lisa''': Stop! I want to learn on my own. | ||
:'''Bart''' [walks out of the room; hangs from a vent]: Canada's govenor's general; "Clowns Love Haircuts, So Should Lee Marvin's Vallet." | :'''Bart''' [walks out of the room; hangs from a vent]: Canada's govenor's general; "Clowns Love Haircuts, So Should Lee Marvin's Vallet." | ||
Line 43: | Line 43: | ||
:'''Homer''': (watching Bart and Lisa on TV) They're gonna be in the same class as each other?! | :'''Homer''': (watching Bart and Lisa on TV) They're gonna be in the same class as each other?! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Marge''': Get back, honky cat. | + | :'''[[Marge]]''': Get back, honky cat. |
---- | ---- | ||
− | :[On "Japanese Friends" on TV] | + | :[On "[[Japanese Friends]]" on TV] |
− | :'''Japanese Chandler''': Do you like my new shirt? It says "Reggae Hair Style Rock n' Roll." Could I be more Japanese? | + | :'''[[Japanese Chandler]]''': Do you like my new shirt? It says "Reggae Hair Style Rock n' Roll." Could I be more Japanese? |
− | :'''Japanese Phoebe''': You are the Emperor of Last Year. | + | :'''[[Japanese Phoebe]]''': You are the Emperor of Last Year. |
:'''Japanese Chandler''': Your comeback shames me. | :'''Japanese Chandler''': Your comeback shames me. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
:'''Lisa''': Bart, I think we're lost. | :'''Lisa''': Bart, I think we're lost. | ||
− | :'''Bart''': I used to be lost, until a friend turned me onto a book. It's called "Lisa is Stupid. | + | :'''Bart''': I used to be lost, until a friend turned me onto a book. It's called "Lisa is Stupid". |
:'''Lisa''': You die now! [tackles Bart] | :'''Lisa''': You die now! [tackles Bart] | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Marge''': Hello, Principal Skinner! | + | :'''[[Marge]]''': Hello, [[Principal Skinner]]! |
:'''Principal Skinner''': (speaks fast) Parent who waves their right to sue says what? | :'''Principal Skinner''': (speaks fast) Parent who waves their right to sue says what? | ||
:'''Marge''': What? | :'''Marge''': What? | ||
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:'''Homer''': Oh, it's red wire to red wire. What idiot dreamed that up? | :'''Homer''': Oh, it's red wire to red wire. What idiot dreamed that up? | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Mrs. McConnell''': Lisa comes to us from Ms. | + | :'''Mrs. McConnell''': Lisa comes to us from [[Ms. Hoover]]… (makes a drinking sound) …while Bart was taught by Mrs. Krabappel. (fake coughs) Slut! |
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Tom Brokaw''' [during the news break]: Oh, Lord, I'm so fat! [vomits in a bucket] | + | :'''[[Tom Brokaw]]''' [during the news break]: Oh, Lord, I'm so fat! [vomits in a bucket] |
---- | ---- | ||
:'''Principal Skinner''': If this episode has taught us anything, it's that nothing works better than the status quo. Bart, you're promoted back to the fourth grade. | :'''Principal Skinner''': If this episode has taught us anything, it's that nothing works better than the status quo. Bart, you're promoted back to the fourth grade. | ||
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:'''Lisa''': Big fish! Big fish! | :'''Lisa''': Big fish! Big fish! | ||
:'''Homer''': The status quo. | :'''Homer''': The status quo. | ||
− | :'''Milhouse''': The status quo? Ay Carumba! | + | :'''[[Milhouse]]''': The status quo? Ay Carumba! |
:'''Principal Skinner''': That's just sad. | :'''Principal Skinner''': That's just sad. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
{{Season 14 Q}} | {{Season 14 Q}} |
Revision as of 15:29, September 14, 2011
- [While Bart is watching the Clock Channel on TV]
- TV announcer: Coming up on the Clock Channel: 6:00.
- Bart: Wait, I already saw this one.
- Lisa: Bart, the test is in 2 hours, and you haven't slept in a fortnight!
- Bart: What's a fortnight?
- Lisa: You should know, it's on the test!
- Mrs. Krabappel: No pressure, children, but these test results will follow you for the rest of your life and beyond the grave.
- Nelson: Ha ha!
- Mrs. McConnell: Young man, you're not in this class. What are you doing here?
- Nelson: Laughing at jerks.
- [Later on the class field trip]
- Nelson: Ha ha!
- Mrs. McConnell: You weren't on this field trip! How did you get here?
- Nelson: Biked.
- Homer: Hey, you can't fool us. We're from the "Learn to Fart" state.
- Lisa: Bart cheated!
- Mrs. McConnell: Young lady, in the third grade we don't care for tattletales.
- Lisa [moans]: Ohhhhh.
- Mrs. McConnell: And we don't care for moaners, either.
- Lisa: [starts crying]
- Mrs. McConnell: Crying only pushes Bart's grade higher!
- Bart [while Lisa is doing her homework]: Quiet nerds burp only near school.
- Lisa: Bart, I'm doing my geography homework.
- Bart: I know. That's how you remember the 4 original provinces of Canada. Quebec, New Brunswick, Ontario, Nova Scotia; "Quiet Nerds Burp Only Near School." And here's how you remember the principle exports; "Dogs Eat Barf Only On Wednesday, Mable."
- Lisa: Stop! I want to learn on my own.
- Bart [walks out of the room; hangs from a vent]: Canada's govenor's general; "Clowns Love Haircuts, So Should Lee Marvin's Vallet."
- Lisa: Get out! (tries to hit Bart with her book)
- Bart: And the Lord said, "Let there be crap!"
- Bart: What?! I gotta be in the same class as her?
- Lisa: What?! I gotta be in the same class as him?
- Homer: (watching Bart and Lisa on TV) They're gonna be in the same class as each other?!
- Marge: Get back, honky cat.
- [On "Japanese Friends" on TV]
- Japanese Chandler: Do you like my new shirt? It says "Reggae Hair Style Rock n' Roll." Could I be more Japanese?
- Japanese Phoebe: You are the Emperor of Last Year.
- Japanese Chandler: Your comeback shames me.
- Lisa: Bart, I think we're lost.
- Bart: I used to be lost, until a friend turned me onto a book. It's called "Lisa is Stupid".
- Lisa: You die now! [tackles Bart]
- Marge: Hello, Principal Skinner!
- Principal Skinner: (speaks fast) Parent who waves their right to sue says what?
- Marge: What?
- Principal Skinner:(holds up an audio recorder and shuts record off) Got it.
- Homer: Oh, it's red wire to red wire. What idiot dreamed that up?
- Mrs. McConnell: Lisa comes to us from Ms. Hoover… (makes a drinking sound) …while Bart was taught by Mrs. Krabappel. (fake coughs) Slut!
- Tom Brokaw [during the news break]: Oh, Lord, I'm so fat! [vomits in a bucket]
- Principal Skinner: If this episode has taught us anything, it's that nothing works better than the status quo. Bart, you're promoted back to the fourth grade.
- Bart: Yeah!
- Principal Skinner: And Lisa, you have a choice. You may continue to be challenged in third grade, or return to second grade and be merely a big fish in a little pond.
- Lisa: Big fish! Big fish!
- Homer: The status quo.
- Milhouse: The status quo? Ay Carumba!
- Principal Skinner: That's just sad.