Difference between revisions of "Homer's Odyssey/Quotes"
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo |Bart the Genius|There's No Disgrace Like Home}} | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo |Bart the Genius|There's No Disgrace Like Home}} | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Edna Krabappel]]}} ''[blows whistle]'' Now, class, I don't want this field trip to be a repeat of our infamous visit to the [[Springfield State Prison]]. So I want you all to be on your best behaviour. ''[looks at Bart]'' Especially you, Bart Simpson. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Mrs. Krabappel, I didn't unlock that door! | |
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---- | ---- | ||
| − | :''[at Moe's Tavern]'' | + | :''[at [[Moe's Tavern]]]'' |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} I'm just a technical supervisor who cared too much. | |
:''[phone rings]'' | :''[phone rings]'' | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Moe}} Moe's Tavern. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} ''[on phone]'' Is Mr. Freely there? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Moe}} Who? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Freely, first initials, I.P. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Moe}} Hold on, I'll check. ''[calls out]'' Is I.P. Freely here? Hey, everybody, I.P. Freely! | |
:''[barflies laugh]'' | :''[barflies laugh]'' | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Moe}} Wait a minute. Listen to me, you lousy bum. When I get a hold of you, you're dead, I swear I'm going to slice your heart in half! | |
:''[Bart and Lisa laugh]'' | :''[Bart and Lisa laugh]'' | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} You'll get that punk someday, Moe. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Moe}} I don't know. He's tough to catch. He keeps changing his name. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Moe Szyslak]]}} I don't think you're ever going to get another job and be able to pay me back. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Bart]]}} All he does is lie there like an unemployed whale. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} I don't know what else to do. | |
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:''[Maggie pokes him in the eye]'' | :''[Maggie pokes him in the eye]'' | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} There's only one thing we can do. Take advantage of the guy. ''[Holds up a report card]'' I need you to sign this, Homer. ''[Bart picks up Homer's hand and writes his signature on the card.]'' | |
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---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Homer]]}} Damn it! I'm no supervising technician. I'm a technical supervisor. It's too late to teach this old dog new tricks. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Marge]]}} There, there, Homer. You've caused plenty of industrial accidents and you've always bounced back. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} You can't depend on me all your lives. You have to learn that there's a little Homer Simpson in all of us. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Smilin' Joe Fission]]}} I'll just put it where nobody'll find it for a million years. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Unlike most of you, I am not a nut. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Our lives are in the hands of men no smarter than you or I. Many of them incompetent boobs. I know this because I've worked alongside them, gone bowling with them, and watched them pass me over for promotions time and time again. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|TV Announcer #1}} Loaftime, the cable network for the unemployed, will be right back with more tips on how to win the lottery right after this. | |
| − | + | {{qf|TV Announcer #2}} Unemployed? Out of work? Sober? You sat around the house all day, but now it's Duff time. Duff, the beer that makes the days fly by. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Duff TV Jingle}} You can't get enough of the wonderful Duff. [[Duff Beer]]! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Beer! Now there's a temporary solution. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Sherri]]}} Hey, Bart. Our dad says your dad is incompetent. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} What does "incompetent" mean? | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Terri]]}} It means he spends more time yakking and scarfing down donuts than doing his job. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Oh, okay. I thought you were putting him down. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} Well, it's no secret. Our city is under siege by a graffiti vandal known as, "[[El Barto]]". Police artists have a composite sketch to go over and if anyone has any information, please contact us immediately. | |
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:''[A sketch of an older, stubbly, mean-looking version of Bart is passed around]'' | :''[A sketch of an older, stubbly, mean-looking version of Bart is passed around]'' | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Cool, man. | |
| − | {{Season 1 Q}} | + | {{Season 1|Q}} |
Latest revision as of 17:32, March 10, 2022
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- Edna Krabappel: [blows whistle] Now, class, I don't want this field trip to be a repeat of our infamous visit to the Springfield State Prison. So I want you all to be on your best behaviour. [looks at Bart] Especially you, Bart Simpson.
- Bart: Mrs. Krabappel, I didn't unlock that door!
- [at Moe's Tavern]
- Homer: I'm just a technical supervisor who cared too much.
- [phone rings]
- Moe: Moe's Tavern.
- Bart: [on phone] Is Mr. Freely there?
- Moe: Who?
- Bart: Freely, first initials, I.P.
- Moe: Hold on, I'll check. [calls out] Is I.P. Freely here? Hey, everybody, I.P. Freely!
- [barflies laugh]
- Moe: Wait a minute. Listen to me, you lousy bum. When I get a hold of you, you're dead, I swear I'm going to slice your heart in half!
- [Bart and Lisa laugh]
- Homer: You'll get that punk someday, Moe.
- Moe: I don't know. He's tough to catch. He keeps changing his name.
- Moe Szyslak: I don't think you're ever going to get another job and be able to pay me back.
- Bart: All he does is lie there like an unemployed whale.
- Lisa: I don't know what else to do.
- [Maggie pokes him in the eye]
- Bart: There's only one thing we can do. Take advantage of the guy. [Holds up a report card] I need you to sign this, Homer. [Bart picks up Homer's hand and writes his signature on the card.]
- Homer: Damn it! I'm no supervising technician. I'm a technical supervisor. It's too late to teach this old dog new tricks.
- Marge: There, there, Homer. You've caused plenty of industrial accidents and you've always bounced back.
- Homer: You can't depend on me all your lives. You have to learn that there's a little Homer Simpson in all of us.
- Smilin' Joe Fission: I'll just put it where nobody'll find it for a million years.
- Homer: Unlike most of you, I am not a nut.
- Homer: Our lives are in the hands of men no smarter than you or I. Many of them incompetent boobs. I know this because I've worked alongside them, gone bowling with them, and watched them pass me over for promotions time and time again.
- TV Announcer #1: Loaftime, the cable network for the unemployed, will be right back with more tips on how to win the lottery right after this.
- TV Announcer #2: Unemployed? Out of work? Sober? You sat around the house all day, but now it's Duff time. Duff, the beer that makes the days fly by.
- Duff TV Jingle: You can't get enough of the wonderful Duff. Duff Beer!
- Homer: Beer! Now there's a temporary solution.
- Sherri: Hey, Bart. Our dad says your dad is incompetent.
- Bart: What does "incompetent" mean?
- Terri: It means he spends more time yakking and scarfing down donuts than doing his job.
- Bart: Oh, okay. I thought you were putting him down.
- Chief Wiggum: Well, it's no secret. Our city is under siege by a graffiti vandal known as, "El Barto". Police artists have a composite sketch to go over and if anyone has any information, please contact us immediately.
- [A sketch of an older, stubbly, mean-looking version of Bart is passed around]
- Bart: Cool, man.
