Ralph's Room 2/Quotes

Quotes

Miss Hoover: Today you will have to design and build a paper costume, and the best one will get a first place ribbon.

Ralph Wiggum: Can I be my cat, Mittens?

Miss Hoover: Use your imagination. [She starts handing out supplies to the students.]

Janey Powell: I'll be a princess.

Lisa: I'll be Ms. Liberty.

Miss Hoover: Of course, Lisa.

[Ralph comes forward to collect some supplies.]

Ralph: I'll be a horse. No, two horses! [He steps on a bottle of glue, squirting glue onto the floor.]

Miss Hoover: [drily] You can be three horses if you want.

[The sarcasm goes over Ralph's head. His spilled glue has made a puddle on the floor, and he has stepped into the puddle with one foot and gotten the glue bottle stuck to the other.]

Ralph: [trying to shake the bottle loose] Mommy, Mommy! My bottle of glue likes my foot!

Miss Hoover: Ralph, I am not your mom. [groaning, to herself] Oh no, it begins!

[Ralph trips and falls into some rolls of paper. The bottle of glue comes loose from his foot, but squirts out even more glue.]

Ralph: Ha ha ha! I fell again! [He tries to get up and trips and falls again.] Ahhh! This is fun!

[Ralph is now tangled up in the rolls of paper, which are stuck to him due to the spilled glue.]

Ralph: Do I look like a horse yet?

[Eventually everyone finishes their costumes.]

Allison Taylor: [wearing a pair of butterfly wings] Great costume, Lisa!

Lisa: [costumed as the Statue of Liberty, pleased with herself] I'm sure I'll win first prize.

[It's time to judge the costumes. The judges are Principal Skinner, who is carrying a blue ribbon, and Miss Hoover. They approach Lisa.]

Principal Skinner: That's a perfect costume!

Miss Hoover: It's just adorable!

Lisa: [to herself, grinning in triumph] I knew it! [She begins an acceptance speech.]

Lisa: Thank you, I wasn't expec— [cutting herself off as she notices Skinner and Hoover are passing her by] Hello! I'm over here!

Principal Skinner: And we have a winner!

Miss Hoover: I agree. Who would have thought it!

[Skinner gives the blue ribbon to Ralph. The other students' reactions range from being shocked and disgusted to being pleased about the outcome. Except for one boy in a banana costume (who repeatedly says, "I'm a banana!"), they're mostly quiet.]

Principal Skinner: [walking away] Best mummy costume ever!

Ralph: [completely wrapped in paper and sporting the blue ribbon] Hop! Hop! I'm a horse! No, I'm two horses!