| An Experiment Where Guinea Pigs are Guinea Pigs
|
| Tapped Out Quest Information
|
An Experiment Where Guinea Pigs are Guinea Pigs is a temporary questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in "The War of Art" episode tie-in content update. It unlocks the Guinea Pig Rescue Center.
Dialogue[edit]
| After starting the update
|
|
Residents of Springfield, do not panic, but we are experiencing an invasion by an alien species.
|
|
|
Every neighborhood, every street is being overwhelmed by--
|
|
GUINEA PIGS!!!
|
|
Dad, I've always wanted one, and here are dozens wandering the streets, desperate to be rescued, and I'm the FIRST LITTLE GIRL on the scene!!
|
|
Hmm, don't you think we should just call animal control? Or lots of speeding cars?
|
|
No, Dad! Let me take them. I'd be the perfect guinea pig owner. I even know their common health problems, which include wheezing...
|
|
...crusty eyes, receding eyes, drooling, watery diarrhea, anorexia, bladder stones, limping, and mange mites.
|
|
That sounds like a lot of fun, honey. But how about anything in the world else?
|
|
We have to rescue them. Guinea pigs are mistreated everywhere. Did you know that in Peru people eat them?
|
|
Wait, they what?
|
|
Nothing, Dad! They nothing.
|
|
I just have one question: how long are they cooked and at what temperature and are they brined and what sauces bring out their delicate flavor?
|
|
They're getting away! Help me rescue them!
|
| Message
|
Tap on the guinea pigs to rescue them!
|
| Task: "Rescue Escaped Guinea Pigs" (x40).
|
|
|
Where did all these poor guinea pigs come from?
|
|
It's common for people to dump unwanted pets in Springfield.
|
|
That's why there's a flock of parrots in that tree, a bunch of ferrets living under Moe's, and hundreds of monkeys in Professor Frink's lab.
|
|
|
It's strange that so many people didn't want their monkeys.
|
|
|
That's horrible! But I'll never give a single one of these cute guinea pigs away -- ow! Hey, that white one just bit me!
|
Quest reward:  100 and  10
|
|
| After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
|
|
Uh-oh, I see blue hair coming this way.
|
|
Homer! There are 40 guinea pigs in Lisa's room!
|
|
|
I know, honey. I'll find a tactic to make her get rid of them right away.
|
|
Good.
|
|
Um, what tactic do you suggest I use?
|
|
Parenting!
|
|
Okay, I'll try, but I haven't had much luck with it before.
|
|
|
Lisa! You can't keep these guinea pigs here. You have to find a home for them right now or you don't get to go to Janie's birthday party.
|
|
|
Okay.
|
|
Good lord, this "parenting" thing is some powerful mojo.
|
| Task: "Make Lisa Locate a Guinea Pig Sanctuary". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 12 hours.
|
|
|
Dad, I found a guinea pig rescue center on Craigslist!
|
|
|
Ah, Craigslist -- the site that killed off classified ads, the yellow pages, and escorts having nowhere to advertise.
|
|
|
The land the rescue center was on was taken over by survivalists, so the center's looking for new land. Apparently it's easy to move – it's a "manufactured home."
|
|
In my day, those were called "mobile homes" and the residents were proud to be called trailer trash.
|
|
But there's no name for these "manufactured home" people! Why must we ruin everything?
|
|
Dad, I'm a little tired of hearing your "take" on things. Can't we just find some land?
|
|
|
Land! The only thing in the world that God's not making any more of... except during the Squidport update.
|
| Quest reward: 100 and 10
|
|
| After completing Pt. 2
|
|
|
I'm so glad we finally found a home for all those adorable guinea pigs.
|
|
|
Can we go there right now and make sure that the workers are calling them by the names I gave them? It's easy to confuse Iphigenia for Clytemnestra.
|
|
Sure, we can go. My shoes can always use a few minutes of standing in shallow pails of bleach.
|
| Message
|
You'll find the Guinea Pig Rescue Center in your inventory!
|
Task: "Place Guinea Pig Rescue Center". It takes 6 seconds.
Task: "Make Lisa Fawn over Rescued Guinea Pigs". The job takes place at the Guinea Pig Rescue Center and takes 8 hours.
|
|
|
The guinea pigs look so happy! And only a couple of them have bumblefoot or the slobbers.
|
|
|
"Bumblefoot or the slobbers?" What are those?
|
|
|
Guinea pig diseases. But not to worry, I don't think humans can get them...
|
|
|
Dad, you tripped! Are you okay?
|
|
|
Yeah, that's weird -- my foot suddenly doesn't fit in my shoe. And I'm drooling like crazy.
|
|
|
Oh, Dad, Pokey the guinea pig is looking at you! Can I please adopt him?
|
|
*slobbering no*.
|
|
|
Please, please, please, please...?
|
|
|
*unintelligible slobbers*
|
| Message
|
Will Lisa get a guinea pig? Always wondered when Max von Sydow would do a voice on a cartoon? Then tune in to this Sunday's episode of The Simpsons, 8/7c on FOX.
|
|
|
That's great, but I wanted a guinea pig.
|
| Message
|
Pokey is now available in the store!
|
| Quest reward: 100 and 10
|
|
