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A Shrimp in Time Pays Fine/Quotes

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki



Captain Squid: Bah! As usual, all my teammates are heading off to battle the enemy in Europe, and I get sent off to patrol the ocean depths. Every time they bust up a spy ring or send an army of brown-shirt goose steppers to the hospital, they get their pictures splashed across the newspapers and magazine covers like movie stars. But when I stop a submarine invasion or beat the daylights out of a hoard of flesh-eating mutant gorilla-fish, is there any payoff for me? No!

Captain Squid: Pleased to eatcha! I'm Captain Squid!
Brine shrimp: Help! Help! Help! There's a shrimp-eating weirdo after me! Help! Help!
Captain Squid: Relax, my little appetizer. It will all be over in one sweet, succulent moment. I promise.

Shrimp mother: Do you mind explaining to me why you've decided to eat my children today?!
Captain Squid: Well, y'see, I'm actually an American super hero who happens to look like a human but who is really part squid. So, naturally, when I saw your children, I became very hungry and ate one of them. And I must honestly say that your offspring were absolutely delicious. I meant no offense.
Shrimp mother: No offense taken. Here, take this bottle of cocktail sauce and knock yourself out. We'll talk later.

Captain Squid: While I'm grateful for the swell mean, I'm a little puzzled by your willingness to allow me to chow down on 10,000 of your offspring.
Shrimp mother: Every day I drop a litter of the little brats and they just hang around the house yakking their heads off. I can't get one of them to shut up. They're driving me crazy.

Black Angus: Aye! Let go! My kilt is not for sale at any cost!

Radio Man: This is amazing, Captain Squid! These kids are going wild for your new product line. You'll make a fortune with this stuff!
Purple Heart: You've already made more than I have selling chocolate bars and silk stockings on the black market!