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A LARP in the Woods
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
A LARP in the Woods
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Tapped Out Quest Information
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A LARP in the Woods is an event-exclusive questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in The Mayflower Maple Bowl content update.
Dialogue[edit]
After completing Be Prepared...to Nap
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ou two are gonna love it here! Camp Nap-A-Lot was my favorite place as a kid. We napped in tents and canoes all day, and at night we'd nap around the campfire!
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Weird that they don't have a sign now.
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Eh, probably some Junior Campers swiped it for their Mischief merit badges.
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That's not actually a thing.
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Is that a cowboy on a horse?
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Is he sleeping? The older campers learned how to nap on horseback.
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There are some early Renaissance French knights over there...
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I think those might be post-apocalyptic bikers heading down that other trail.
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Are they time travelers? Does anyone see Professor Frink?
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Excuse me, uh, Sir Knight. Can you tell us what's happening here?
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Oh, ho, ho! Mais oui, mademoiselle! The people who used to own this campground sold it to the United Live Action Role Players of America — or U-LARPA for short.
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That's very cool, but who are those people at the picnic cabana dressed in suits?
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Oh, they're the "West Wing" crowd. They're LARPing a version of America where our political system isn't completely corrupt and dysfunctional and good people really can make a difference.
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So fantasy roleplayers, basically.
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Task: "Collect Merit Badges" (x155). Task: "Make Homer Wonder if This Is Another Time Travel Event". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. If Bart or Scouting Bart is owned: Task: "Make Scouting Bart Feel Conflicted". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Lisa Feel Depressed About America". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Well this completely stinks!
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I don't know. I feel conflicted. I can't decide if I want to join the wasteland bikers or make fun of LARPers.
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Zut alors! If you want to stay, you have to be some kind of LARP group.
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Can we LARP as a dysfunctional American family?
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That works!
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Quest reward: 100 and 10 Scout Tent
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After completing Pt. 1
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Okay, we've found a nice quiet spot equally distant from all the weirdos. You two can get started on your first merit badge: letting Daddy get some shut-eye.
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That's not a real merit badge!
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Sounds like "good citizenship" to me.
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We want to earn our badges!
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Is there one for debating?
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Yes, but we need to have three more arguments to qualify.
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Let the man sleep, Lis. He'll sign off on whatever badges we want later.
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I thought you wanted to earn your badges.
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What? Have you been listening to a word I've said? Or were you just tapping through the dialogue without reading it?
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Task: "Collect Merit Badges" (x125). Task: "Make Lisa Fight with Bart". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. If Scouting Bart or Bart is owned: Task: "Make Scouting Bart/Bart Fight with Lisa". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Homer Finally Start to Nap". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. If any LARPers are owned: Task: "Make LARPers Interrupt Homer's Nap" (x3). The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Cheater!
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Goody Two-Shoes!
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QUIET!
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Yeah, shut it, you pilgrim hose heads!
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That's what I was going to say to you, you heretical Canadian football jock!
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This took a turn.
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Speaking of heresy, why am I not surprised to find Homer Simpson in the middle of all of this! Of course you're a football fan— you embrace everything gluttonous and sinful!
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I'm just playing the odds: Sin is underrated against virtue. But I support real American football, not phony Canadian football.
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And don't even mention those guys who call soccer football and then act like we're stupid for knowing what's really what. It makes me so angry and confused!
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Reverend Lovejoy, can you please tell us what is going on?
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Your family is camping between two warring LARP factions, that's what's going on!
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Those raucous Canadian football LARPers keep ruining our godly pilgrim ambience with their loud 110-yard-long, 65-yard-wide games!
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And you pilgrims keep ruining our games with the smell of hand-churned butter!
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Mmmm! Butter!
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Quest reward: 100 and 10 Forest Stream
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After completing Pt. 2
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Reverend Lovejoy, the attention to historical detail at your pilgrim village is really amazing!
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Why, thank you, Lisa.
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I mean, it's fantastic to see so many people working together for the collective good without any interference from profit-seeking businessmen or—
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You know, we're looking for a lead for our witch trials reenactment, and you would be perfect.
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Oh, heh, I think Mrs. Lovejoy needs help churning butter, gottagobye!
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Task: "Collect Merit Badges" (x125). Task: "Make Lisa Earn a Role in the Pilgrim LARP". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. If Scouting Bart or Bart is owned: Task: "Make Scouting Bart/Bart Train in Canadian Football". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Homer Try to Nap Again". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Wow, I can't believe you had a uniform in my size. This is awesome!
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Canadians are all either tiny or huge. Many people outside of Canada don't know aboot that.
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Can I take a few snaps at quarterback?
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Of course!
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Twenty-seven! Thirty-two! Hut-hut!
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...Why isn't the rest of the team doing anything?
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You have to say "Hut-hut, eh?"
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Quest reward: 100 and 10 Canadian Football Players
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After completing Pt. 3
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Thank you for inviting me to your pilgrim village, Reverend Lovejoy. But I'm not sure a patriarchal theocracy has much to offer me.
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Did I mention that our main activity is scolding others for not living up to our moral standards?
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I'm in!
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Buckle your hat, Lisa, you're in for the moralistic adventure of a lifetime!
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Narrator
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Meanwhile, at the Field Goal of Dreams field...
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Ah, those pilgrim LARPers honestly aren't that bad. We just get a little worked up playing the greatest brand of football in the world.
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Aren't that bad? My sister's hanging out with them now, and turned into a holier-than-thou know-it-all!
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Now that you mention it, so are those pilgrims! They called us heretics because we put the goalposts at the front of the endzones.
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They said God predestined goalposts to be at the back of the endzone.
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I say we have the free will to place goalposts wherever we want... including in front of their church!
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Yeah! Let's go!
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Oh, this is too much fun.
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Task: "Collect Merit Badges" (x155). Task: "Make Lisa Complain to Pilgrims About Bart". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. If Scouting Bart or Bart is owned: Task: "Make Scouting Bart/Bart Complain to Canadian Footballers About Lisa". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Homer Give Up on Napping". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Your rickety wooden prayer hut is weaker than a Newfy's French! You'd better move to the other side of the park if you don't want us to break your church into more pieces than an episode of SCTV on ViewTube.
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Ha! Good one...I think!
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Well, putting maple syrup on everything at your concession stand is an abomination! God's chosen condiments are ketchup, mustard, and onions!
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Good...one? *sigh*
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Why can't you both just shut up?! A man is trying to nap here!
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He's right! We're going to shun you with the famous Puritan silent treatment!
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Fine! We'll do the same thing, but in a very Canadian way.
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Which is...?
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We'll sit and silently pout on our Chesterfield.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10 Field Goal of Dreams
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After completing Pt. 4
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So, wait, you're just going to not do anything, even with tourists coming to watch?
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That's right.
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But...but we were getting to participate and everything! I even learned what a kilometer was to be more authentically Canadian.
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What is a kilometer?
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It's like a mile but shorter and with less freedom.
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Well, there's not going to be any Canadian football game here today!
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Or any Puritan reenactment! The Canadian Footballers have destroyed our historic authenticity!
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The Lovejoy killjoys have made us feel bad about drinking, gambling, and idling, the holy trinity for sports fans!
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What if you could combine your conflicting fantasy worlds into one giant super-LARP?
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How would that even work?
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You could play a game of Canadian football and then celebrate with a feast of historic Puritan dishes.
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Can the feast include poutine?
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What do you say, Reverend?
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I suppose we could sub it for the oyster stuffing. Nobody likes that.
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Can we hold a three-hour church service between the game and feast?
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How about starting the meal with a blessing?
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Deal! Praise the Lord and pass the butter churn!
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And we'll call this holiday Canadian Thanksgiving!
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WOOHOO!
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Wait, is that some kind of shot?
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Task: "Collect Merit Badges" (x190). Task: "Make Lisa Share Butter She Churned Herself". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. If Scouting Bart or Bart is owned: Task: "Make Scouting Bart/Bart Pass the Bread...Literally". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Homer Start Eating Before the Blessing". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours. If Puritan Lovejoy is owned: Task: "Make Puritan Lovejoy Say a Blessing". The job takes place at Camping or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10 Scouting Lisa
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Currency-earning jobs[edit]
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