Info Bores
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Tapped Out Quest Information
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Info Bores is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in The Buck Stops Here content update. It requires Birch Barlow to be obtained.
Dialogue
Pt. 1
After tapping on Birch Barlow's exclamation mark
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I can't believe my radio show was canceled just because I said we should nuke Tax-achusetts and dump the ashes in Holly-good-riddance, Cali-won't-mourn-ia.
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Those Politically Corr-wrecked Dumb-ocrats are so thin-skinned!
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Your unfiltered, tortured-wordplay-ridden ramblings are just what I'm looking for to start my radio production company!
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Whoa, there. I'm not about to bow down to some tea-bagging British sponsors.
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I'm talking about satellite radio -- no advertisers, no censorship!
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You mean I'd be able to say whatever I want? You won't sic the PC Police on me?
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No! I want your unfettered madness infecting our listeners. Nothing gets more subscribers than an extremist! How do you think Bob Ross got so popular?
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You have a deal.
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Task: "Make Birch Barlow Prepare for Radio Show". The job takes place at the Capital City Capitol Building, Capital City Plaza Hotel, or Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 2
After tapping on Birch Barlow's exclamation mark
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Good morning, freedom-likers. Birch Barlow, the fourth branch of government the fifty-first state, is back on the air.
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Today we are going to cover the proceedings on Bill HB-0101, a measure that would make False Flag burning illegal.
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But first, I know what you're thinking: “Birch, how is it that Spend-o-Crats keep spending”? And that's something that I'd like to know, too.
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We keep getting duped by a party who cannot align on which areas they are corrupt in spending? Call now, and let's talk.
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Task: "Make Birch Barlow Take Callers". The job takes place at the Capital City Plaza Hotel or Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Hey, Birch, longtime listener, first time use-my-one-phone-call-er. My question for you is, how many times are these Fib-erals going to--
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“Fib-erals”?! What the hell does that mean? You're talking jibberish; you aren't making any sense.
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Sounds to me like maybe you're a guest at the Greybar Hotel because you're another one of those Liberal Lefties who packed his peace-pipe full of Wacky-Tobacky! Next caller!
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 3
After tapping on Birch Barlow's exclamation mark
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Good morning again, freedom-lovers. Let's go ahead and jump right into it. The Capital City politicians are corrupt.
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I'm here on the inside, watching the way they work, like the little toy scuba diver in the fishbowl, surrounded by vicious clownfish. First caller!
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Uh, yeah, it sounds like there's a lot of colludin' going on behind our backs, under our noses, and in those hard-to-reach places I can never get to with floss.
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Is it safe to say that the Democrats have been lying to us this whole time? Did the moon landing not happen? Are they sulfur people from hell?
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*chuckles* My friend, you have a wild imagination…but you are absolutely right! We are dealing with SULFUR PEOPLE!
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Task: "Make Birch Barlow Spin Conspiracy Theories". The job takes place at the Capital City Plaza Hotel or Brown House and takes 6 hours.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 4
After tapping on Birch Barlow's exclamation mark
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Good morning, Americans. Today, I must announce to you that we are at war.
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The Dumb-ocrats are at it again. They think my show perpetuates “LIES” and incites “VIOLENCE”. Well, you know what I think? If it's American to LIE to get your point across, then call me Bend-the-Truth Franklin!
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They set their demo-dog Mayor Joe Quimby on me. He's attempting to organize a boycott. Well the only thing my listeners boycott…are FACTS!
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Task: "Make Birch Barlow Spin Lies Against Quimby". The job takes place at the Capital City Plaza Hotel or Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 5
After tapping on Birch Barlow's exclamation mark
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Whew. All this hateful rhetoric is really starting to take a toll on my health. *eats donuts* I don't think I can keep this up much longer, I'm running out of faux outrage.
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Birchy, baby! There's my little Republican-do. Your ratings are through the roof, and you have the most callers of any show I've ever produced.
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I want you to keep on spouting your Conserva-nonsense until you're red in the face. Well, REDDER in the face. How about signing a long-term contract?
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I get to keep manufacturing rage while you pay me top dollar?
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Mm-hmm.
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You've got yourself a deal. It's a pleasure doing business with you.
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Now get out of here, you job-stealing foreigner!
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Task: "Make Birch Barlow Go Haywire". The job takes place at the Capital City Capitol Building, Capital City Plaza Hotel, or Brown House and takes 8 hours.
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Quest reward: 200 and 20
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Behind the Laughter
The quest name is a reference to the far-right conspiracy theory and fake news website InfoWars.