Homer Simpson, This Is Your Wife/Quotes

General

References/Trivia

Appearances

Gags

Credits

Quotes

	Season 17 Episode Quotes
← 370 "Bart Has Two Mommies"	371 "Homer Simpson, This Is Your Wife"	"Million-Dollar Abie" 372 →

• (after Homer moons the camera)
  Producer: Uhhh! We'd better pixellate those!
  Cameraman: There aren't enough pixels in the world!
  Producer: Yeah umm, just cover it with Ryan Seacrest's head.
• Homer: If I have enough strength, I'll take you up to the TV and show you how thin it is.
• Carl: Ain't no party like a Lenny party, 'cause a Lenny party don't stop! (looks at his watch) Oh man, I've got work tomorrow. See ya.
• Lisa: I've seen this same show on a different network.
  Fox Executive: (stares at her nervously) Here, have a FOX sweatshirt.
  Lisa (puts it on and looks on the back): This is an ABC sweatshirt.
  Executive: And it zips up all the way! (zips up the sweatshirt, muffling Lisa's shouts)
• Lisa: I don't understand, Dad. Our family has so many flaws, why must we share them with the world?
  Homer: Because we'll be on TV! And earn enough money to buy a TV! TV!
  Lisa: But, Dad!
  Homer: Yes, Teeveesa?
  Lisa: Ergh, forget it.
  
• Verity: Charles hasn't satisfied me in years.
  Homer: "That's how I feel about Notre Dame football.
• Patty: What brought us together is how much we hate you!
  Homer: Okay then. I'll just vote "no" on Prop 38 so you can't adopt! (Patty twists Homer's arm) Ooooowwww! Kidding! I don't vote! The voting place is up the hill and I never make it! (Patty twists Homer's arm harder)
• Sideshow Mel: I've never seen a picture so highly-defined!
• Brandine: Can you believe it, Cletus? Another party and we can't go.
  Cletus: Yeah, just 'cause we's afraid to use an uppity-box.
• Tour Guide: Look, there's Dan Castellaneta from The Tracey Ullman Show.
  Homer: (leaning out of the tour guide tram) Hey funny man! Say something funny!
  Dan Castellaneta: Please don't lean out of the tram sir, you might get hurt.
  Homer: (childish imitating Castelleneta) Oh! Don't lean out of the tram! (he then gets hit by a gold statue of Mischa Barton)
• Homer: Marge, thank God you're home! She made me spend time with the kids! And not just TV time. Talking time!
• Charles: You're leaving me for him?
  Homer: So it would appear. However, Cousin It there was born a woman.
• lyrics to "Picture in Picture" sung by Homer:
  You make me laugh, you make me cry
  Without you I'd just want to die
  For the rest of my life you'll be a fixture
  Now let me enjoy your picture in picture.
• lyrics to "Lady Blue" sung by Charles:
  Lady when you came to me, I was feeling blue
  Blue just like your hair, you see
  Blue just like the moon
  But only when the moon is blue
  And not when it is cream
  And now that you are here with me
  I am in a dream
  (In normal voice)Oh, yeah, Marge, your dreams can come true.
  
  Lady, when you go away
  I feel like I could die
  Not like dye like your hair is dye
  But die like Lady Di
  And not like Di like her name is Di
  But die like when she died
  But lady just like Lady Di
  Be my princess tonight
  But don't die
  Don't die.