Difference between revisions of "...Moe's Tried and Almost Successful Pickup Lines!"
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'''...Moe's Tried and Almost Successful Pickup Lines!''' is list of pickup lines by [[Moe]] in ''[[The Book of Moe]]''. | '''...Moe's Tried and Almost Successful Pickup Lines!''' is list of pickup lines by [[Moe]] in ''[[The Book of Moe]]''. | ||
==Pickup lines== | ==Pickup lines== | ||
− | *Babe, you owe me a buck thirty-nine: you're so hot, you curdled the | + | *Babe, you owe me a buck thirty-nine: you're so hot, you curdled the yogurt in my fanny pack. |
− | *Darlin', | + | *Darlin', standin' next to you does the impossible... it makes me even uglier. |
− | *Well, you're | + | *Well, you're obviously an angel, so I guess your wings got amputated, huh? Did God kick you out for stealin' or something'? |
− | *Your daddy musta worked at Ikea because you are put | + | *Your daddy musta worked at Ikea because you are put together nice! |
*Finally! You're here! I ordered a tall drink of water and hour ago! | *Finally! You're here! I ordered a tall drink of water and hour ago! | ||
*Wow, I never thought I'd see an angel in a craphouse like this. | *Wow, I never thought I'd see an angel in a craphouse like this. | ||
*(Or if you wanna get a good look at here rack...) baby, mind if I put some breadcrumbs down your blouse, 'cuz I am lost in your eyes. | *(Or if you wanna get a good look at here rack...) baby, mind if I put some breadcrumbs down your blouse, 'cuz I am lost in your eyes. | ||
− | *Can I buy you dinner? You | + | *Can I buy you dinner? You obviously like strappin' on the feedbag. |
*Honey, it's all right if you got a temper, 'cuz I can take a punch. | *Honey, it's all right if you got a temper, 'cuz I can take a punch. | ||
*Listen, gorgeous, if you're lookin' for an east mark to seduce and steal his identity... I'm your man. | *Listen, gorgeous, if you're lookin' for an east mark to seduce and steal his identity... I'm your man. | ||
*Holy God, I shouldn't even be talkin' to you. it's like a disfigured rat chattin' up a unicorn. | *Holy God, I shouldn't even be talkin' to you. it's like a disfigured rat chattin' up a unicorn. | ||
− | *Baby, you need a "YOU ARE HERE", sign on your forehead 'cuz I am | + | *Baby, you need a "YOU ARE HERE", sign on your forehead 'cuz I am lost in your eyes. |
*Listen, do you happen to have a blind twin sister? | *Listen, do you happen to have a blind twin sister? | ||
*I'm not officially a hunchback, but if you find that kinda thing romantic, I'm pretty much there. | *I'm not officially a hunchback, but if you find that kinda thing romantic, I'm pretty much there. | ||
− | *Man, I want to be frozen until science can | + | *Man, I want to be frozen until science can discover a way for men like me to have a change with women like you. |
− | *Wow, if you were, like a type of factory or somethin' you'd be an oil | + | *Wow, if you were, like a type of factory or somethin' you'd be an oil refinery... because the word "Fine" is in it. |
*Noy you are a girl worth puttin' on deodorant for. | *Noy you are a girl worth puttin' on deodorant for. | ||
*Hey, if you Spring for me, I'll Fall for you. Please don't hit me. | *Hey, if you Spring for me, I'll Fall for you. Please don't hit me. | ||
*What's your sign, baby? Mine's "No Fat Chicks." | *What's your sign, baby? Mine's "No Fat Chicks." | ||
*Baby, watch out! You got so many curves you're makin' me carsick! | *Baby, watch out! You got so many curves you're makin' me carsick! | ||
− | *Why don't you go out with me and confuse everybody who | + | *Why don't you go out with me and confuse everybody who believes in Natural Selection? |
*You're so sweet, there oughta be ants crawling all over ya. | *You're so sweet, there oughta be ants crawling all over ya. | ||
*Can I buy you a drink? It'll help you tolerate my face. And my voice. And my smell. | *Can I buy you a drink? It'll help you tolerate my face. And my voice. And my smell. |
Revision as of 15:54, March 29, 2014
...Moe's Tried and Almost Successful Pickup Lines! is list of pickup lines by Moe in The Book of Moe.
Pickup lines
- Babe, you owe me a buck thirty-nine: you're so hot, you curdled the yogurt in my fanny pack.
- Darlin', standin' next to you does the impossible... it makes me even uglier.
- Well, you're obviously an angel, so I guess your wings got amputated, huh? Did God kick you out for stealin' or something'?
- Your daddy musta worked at Ikea because you are put together nice!
- Finally! You're here! I ordered a tall drink of water and hour ago!
- Wow, I never thought I'd see an angel in a craphouse like this.
- (Or if you wanna get a good look at here rack...) baby, mind if I put some breadcrumbs down your blouse, 'cuz I am lost in your eyes.
- Can I buy you dinner? You obviously like strappin' on the feedbag.
- Honey, it's all right if you got a temper, 'cuz I can take a punch.
- Listen, gorgeous, if you're lookin' for an east mark to seduce and steal his identity... I'm your man.
- Holy God, I shouldn't even be talkin' to you. it's like a disfigured rat chattin' up a unicorn.
- Baby, you need a "YOU ARE HERE", sign on your forehead 'cuz I am lost in your eyes.
- Listen, do you happen to have a blind twin sister?
- I'm not officially a hunchback, but if you find that kinda thing romantic, I'm pretty much there.
- Man, I want to be frozen until science can discover a way for men like me to have a change with women like you.
- Wow, if you were, like a type of factory or somethin' you'd be an oil refinery... because the word "Fine" is in it.
- Noy you are a girl worth puttin' on deodorant for.
- Hey, if you Spring for me, I'll Fall for you. Please don't hit me.
- What's your sign, baby? Mine's "No Fat Chicks."
- Baby, watch out! You got so many curves you're makin' me carsick!
- Why don't you go out with me and confuse everybody who believes in Natural Selection?
- You're so sweet, there oughta be ants crawling all over ya.
- Can I buy you a drink? It'll help you tolerate my face. And my voice. And my smell.
- Wanna go out? I know I'm ugly, but you ain't no Sharon Gless yourself.
- Hi. Please don't mace me.