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==Featured Article==
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[[File:Personalized Talking Astrolabe.png|200px|right|link=Personalized Talking Astrolabe]]
'''[[John Swartzwelder]]''' (born November 16, 1950) is a writer for the animated television series ''[[The Simpsons]]''. He is credited with writing the largest number of ''Simpsons'' episodes. John was one of several writers recruited to The Simpsons from the pages of [[George Meyer]]'s ''[[Army Man]]'' magazine.
 
  
Beginning with the show's sixth season, Swartzwelder no longer attended rewrites with the rest of the staff, having been given special dispensation to send in his drafts from home and let the other writers revise them.
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The '''Personalized Talking Astrolabe''' is a gold-plated {{W|astrolabe}}.
  
According to his longtime collaborators on ''The Simpsons'', [[Al Jean]] and [[Mike Reiss]], Swartzwelder is a huge fan of [[Preston Sturges]] films and loves "anything old-timey American." This vaguely defined aesthetic presents itself in many of the episodes he's written, in the form of wandering hobos, Prohibition-era speakeasies, carnies, 19th-century baseball players, aging Western movie stars, and Sicilian gangsters.
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While out [[Christmas]] shopping at [[Springfield Heights Promenade]], [[Homer]] spotted the Personalized Talking Astrolabe in the window of [[Things Unnecessary]]. Homer immediately became enamored with the object and went into the shop, where an employee showed it to him. However, he looked at the price tag of $500 and realized that if he bought it, he wouldn't have any money left to buy a Christmas tree for the family. The Astrolabe then told Homer that it was [[Margaret Cho]]'s birthday, which Homer said was the birthday he always forgot. He then decided to buy the Astrolabe.
  
According to the DVD commentaries, he used to write episodes while sitting at a booth in his favorite restaurant "drinking copious amounts of coffee and smoking endless cigarettes" (Matt Groening). When the state of California passed an anti-smoking law, Swartzwelder bought a diner booth and installed it in his house, allowing him to smoke and write in peace.
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Due to buying the Astrolabe for himself, Homer had to take the family to get an awful tree in a bad part of town. The tree he purchased immediately caught fire and had to be extinguished. The family started realizing that something was wrong because they should have had enough money for a good tree. The Astrolabe, which Homer had wrapped up, then called out the time in [[Montreal]] and said that the moon was waxing that night. Homer tried to play it off as [[Maggie]]'s first words, but Marge found the gift-wrapped Astrolabe and realized that Homer had wasted their money on something extravagant for himself. [[Lisa]] called Homer selfish, and the Astrolabe then told him it was not returnable and started a three-hour smoke alarm test...
  
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<p style="font-size: small; text-align: right;">[[Personalized Talking Astrolabe|Read more of this article]] | [[Wikisimpsons:Previous Featured articles|More featured articles]] | [[Wikisimpsons:Featured article|Vote for a featured article]]</p><noinclude>
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Latest revision as of 07:36, December 1, 2024

Personalized Talking Astrolabe.png

The Personalized Talking Astrolabe is a gold-plated astrolabe.

While out Christmas shopping at Springfield Heights Promenade, Homer spotted the Personalized Talking Astrolabe in the window of Things Unnecessary. Homer immediately became enamored with the object and went into the shop, where an employee showed it to him. However, he looked at the price tag of $500 and realized that if he bought it, he wouldn't have any money left to buy a Christmas tree for the family. The Astrolabe then told Homer that it was Margaret Cho's birthday, which Homer said was the birthday he always forgot. He then decided to buy the Astrolabe.

Due to buying the Astrolabe for himself, Homer had to take the family to get an awful tree in a bad part of town. The tree he purchased immediately caught fire and had to be extinguished. The family started realizing that something was wrong because they should have had enough money for a good tree. The Astrolabe, which Homer had wrapped up, then called out the time in Montreal and said that the moon was waxing that night. Homer tried to play it off as Maggie's first words, but Marge found the gift-wrapped Astrolabe and realized that Homer had wasted their money on something extravagant for himself. Lisa called Homer selfish, and the Astrolabe then told him it was not returnable and started a three-hour smoke alarm test...

Read more of this article | More featured articles | Vote for a featured article