• Wikisimpsons needs more Featured Article, Picture, Quote, Episode and Comprehensive article nominations!
  • Wikisimpsons has a Discord server! Click here for your invite! Join to talk about the wiki, Simpsons and Tapped Out news, or just to talk to other users.
  • Make an account! It's easy, free, and your work on the wiki can be attributed to you.
TwitterFacebookDiscord

Cremains of the Day/Quotes

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki


Season 35 Episode Quotes
764 "Night of the Living Wage"
765
"Cremains of the Day"
"The Tell-Tale Pants" 766


Homer: Oh, boy, I got 100 quid on the Jag-u-ars, and I don't even know how much that is.
Carl Carlson: I'm Buffalo all the way. Ten bob, six shillings, baby.

Homer: I don't know why we had to come here. Funerals are stupid. You're all excused from coming to mine.
Bart: Good. I had something that day anyway. [quietly, to Lisa] I didn't have anything that day.

Marge: I'm so glad you guys could make it.
Carl: How could we not? Larry was... around.

Reverend Lovejoy: Sorry I'm late. Uh... [quietly] Who are we doing today?
Alice Glick: A sad, balding drunk who hung out at Moe's.
Reverend Lovejoy: Got it. Homer Simpson was a beloved pillar of this community.

Iris Dalrymple: Perhaps one of you could talk about Larry's love of fishing.
Homer: Uh, uh, one time, we went to this great fishing lake. Lake Fish.
Carl: Oh, yeah. Fish Lake was full of... ...fish.
Lenny Leonard: You know who always caught the biggest fish?
Homer: Who? Who?
Lenny: I-I, uh... I want to say Larry?
Homer: [chuckles] Big Fish Larry.
Carl: Oh, yeah. Larry, indeed.
Lenny: Watch out, fish!
Moe Szyslak: What a true story.

Homer: Is it possible we're terrible people?
Marge: Yes, but the one I'm really disappointed in is... Lenny.
Lenny: What?
Marge: You just always struck me as a sensitive guy with a good heart.
Lenny: I did?

Homer: I can't go to Serenity Falls. It sounds stressful!
Marge: [grunts]
Homer: And I... love stress?

Homer: We spent a million hours with this guy, but he never felt like one of us. He was a drunk, and we're just social drinkers who also drink alone.
Carl: Two different worlds.

Moe: Here's the deal... when you croak, it's just a sad, silent void. Nothin'. And it's not even a regular nothin'. It's an absence of everything, huh? Where no matter how hard you think, you can't imagine how nothin' it is.
Homer: Like that abandoned mall where the JCPenney's is full of bears?
Moe: No.

Lenny: I'm not going to jail 'cause you two were gem smuggling.
Carl: It's worse than that, dummy. Homer and Moe weren't gonna tell us about the sapphires they found in the Larry crumbs.
Moe: I wanted to tell you, but Homer threatened to set my bar on fire.
Homer: What? You told me to keep the gems a secret, and I only listened to you because I'm highly suggestible.
Moe: No, you're not.
Homer: You're right, I'm not.

Fat Tony: Excellent work, Mickey No-Loose-Ends.
Mickey No-Loose-Ends: So what you want me to do with them?
Fat Tony: Mm, let them go. They know nothing.
Mickey No-Loose-Ends: Got it. No loose ends.
Fat Tony: Ugh, I gotta pay more attention to the nicknames when I hire these guys. Now, can you go pick up Connie at the airport, Bruno Wife-Banger?
Bruno Wife-Banger: Hey, with pleasure.
Season 35 Quotes
Homer's Crossing A Mid-Childhood Night's Dream McMansion & Wife Thirst Trap: A Corporate Love Story Treehouse of Horror XXXIV Iron Marge It's a Blunderful Life Ae Bonny Romance Murder, She Boat Do the Wrong Thing Frinkenstein's Monster Lisa Gets an F1 Clan of the Cave Mom Night of the Living Wage Cremains of the Day The Tell-Tale Pants The Tipping Point Bart's Brain