The Simpsons: Tapped Out Into the Simpsonsverse content update/The Royal Maltreatment Gameplay

The Royal Maltreatment

The Royal Maltreatment Pt. 1

After the user logs in on August 13th: What the? Who in the Sam Spade are you? Princess Homer, at your service. You're a wide drink of water, alright, but I reversed the portal to take us back to the '30s. Why is it spitting out dames? You didn't reverse anything. You've opened up a portal to the Fantasy Universe. The Fantasy Universe? What does that mean? Hmm. If you've opened up a portal to the Fantasy Universe, and this lady says she's a princess... Oh, no! Quick, you've gotta stop her. Maggie made me watch a ton of these and I know what's coming next. Some sort of dangerous fantasy attack? Worse. A musical number! And a one, and a two, and a... Task: Collect Tiaras [x115] Task: Make Homer Plug His Ears (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) If the user has Noir Homer: Task: Make Noir Homer Be Confused and Horrified (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) A DREAM IS A WISH YOUR HEART... Stop singing! Princess movies always have some villainess who shows up like a skunk at a wedding as soon as the princess starts singing about her hopes and dreams. Some mean rich lady with a name like Evil-lyn or Cruelerina or Villaina that sounds fancy and years later you realize was sort of a joke. I beg your pardon? A pardon? I like the begging, but no, I don't think I'll be granting any pardons today. In fact, I don't think I've ever granted a pardon, and I'd hate to spoil my perfect record. Great, another princess. Aren't you a charmer? Yes, long ago they called me "princess", but these days I'm going for more of an evil godmother vibe. My new thing is world domination. Which world? I'm sorry? Well, you just came through the portal. So do you plan to dominate this world or the world you came from? Good point. Let me back up a moment... *clears throat* And as I was saying, my new thing is UNIVERSE domination. *gasp* You had to ask. Quest reward: 100 and 10

The Royal Maltreatment Pt. 2

After completing The Royal Maltreatment Pt. 1: Look, lady. I don't know what your deal is, but no one's achieving world domination or universe domination or multi-verse domination on my watch. *cocks gun* Ooh, multi-verse domination. I hadn't thought of that. See? It's not so easy to not accidentally mention new types of domination, now is it? Say, you gentlemen look like you've had a long day. Who would care for some refreshments? Ooh, refreshments! Don't be a sap, Nowadays Homer. She's a no good moll and she's liable to slip us a mickey. Excuse me, but who's the expert of this time period again? That's right, it's me. Now, you were saying about refreshments? I just so happen to have three ice-cold, frothy ales in a glass. Care to have a taste? *pushes Homer out of the way* Me first, me first! Me second! I may be a street-smart Noir Homer, but I'm still a Homer. *narrating* And that was the last thing I remember saying before the lights went out. Adequate. Task: Collect Tiaras [x155] Task: Make Homer Drink Poison Beer (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) If the user has Noir Homer: Task: Make Noir Homer Partake (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) If the user has Evil Godmother Burns: Task: Make Evil Godmother Burns Poison Everyone (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) Hey, I don't feel so good. Yeah, there's something fishy about these beers. Tastes fine to me. Oh, wait — okay yeah there it is — yep, it's poison. If this is the best this universe has to offer, I shall make short work of this place. Now, if you'll excuse me gentlemen, I have a multi-verse domination plot to write. Before you go, can I get a refill? *passes out* Quest reward: 100 and 10

The Royal Maltreatment Pt. 3

After completing The Royal Maltreatment Pt. 2: *slowly waking up* Ugh, what time is it? How long have we been out? Ugh, my head is killing me. I think I left some painkillers in my pumpkin carriage — which is missing! My pumpkin carriage is gone! That saint of a Godmother must have taken it to get us more beer! I like her. No, you idiot, she poisoned us so she could steal it and get away. What's this? There's a trail of pumpkin seeds leading that direction. I bet if we follow them, they'll lead us right to her. Not if Homer keeps eating them. What? I like a salty snack to help cure my hangovers. Task: Collect Tiaras [x115] If the user has Noir Homer: Task: Make Noir Homer Chase Down the Evil Godmother (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) Task: Make Homer Take a Few Pumpkin Seeds for the Road (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) I don't even know where we are anymore. Does anyone recognize this part of town? Nope. I've never been to this town before. So...is that a no? It does seem like the portal is bringing in more magical creatures from my fantasy universe. See, there's a unicorn over there! That's not a unicorn. That's a horse with an ice cream cone stuck to its head. Look, I'll show you. C'mere horsey... Homer, I don't think that's a good idea. Unicorns aren't quite like what you've been led to be— Oww! Oof, that looked like it hurt. That thing kicked the bejesus out of him. It wasn't an ice cream cone, was it? Still undetermined. Quest reward: 100 and 10

The Royal Maltreatment Pt. 4

After completing The Royal Maltreatment Pt. 3: Hmm, the trail of pumpkin seeds stops here. Look, we're in the Land of Fruits and Vegetables! Hey, stop eating our fruit! Mmm...giant pineapples... Enormous strawberries... *gasp* Brussels sprouts! Please excuse him miss. We're tracking an evil godmother that might have passed this way. She was driving a pumpkin carriage. Have you seen her? Yes, she came through here not more than an hour ago. She did?! Do you know where she went? She came here to the Land of Fruits and Vegetables to acquire some food. Said she needed enough to feed an army. An army? You know what that means. She's joining the military! What? No. She's going back to the portal to summon her evil army to take over this world. *gasp* That's even worse! Task: Collect Tiaras [x155] Task: Make Noir Homer Facepalm (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) Task: Make Homer Grab Some Giant Grapes for the Road (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) If the user has Princess Jules: Task: Make Princess Jules Sic Her Unicorn on Homer (4h, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) Quest reward: 100 and 10

The Royal Maltreatment Pt. 5

After completing The Royal Maltreatment Pt. 4: We're never going to make it back to the power plant before the evil godmother. She's already got a head start on us! You leave that to me. I know a shortcut! *opens cell phone* Hello, Number 1? I need you to open the secret boulder shortcut on I-99. Is this Homer Simpson? I thought I told you never to call this number. Look, I don't have time to argue with you, I'm on official police business. If I open the shortcut, will you stop calling me? No, but I WILL stop texting you! Good enough. The shortcut has been opened. Woo-hoo! Alright guys, buckle your seat belts, this is going to be a bumpy ride. What's a "seat belt"? Task: Collect Tiaras [x195] Task: Make Homer Text a "Thank You" to Number 1 (4h, Land of Fruits and Vegetables, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) If the user has Noir Homer: Task: Make Noir Homer Try to Figure Out the Seat Belt (4h, Land of Fruits and Vegetables, Cooling Towers, Control Building or Homes) Phew, we made it, and just in time by the looks of it. I don't see the evil godmother's carriage. Uh, excuse me. That's MY carriage. Technically it's a huge pumpkin, so let's not split hairs. We just need to get this portal shut down. I think I'll play it safe this time and just unplug the whole thing. *unplugs the portal* Uh oh... Something's wrong. It's not shutting down. Yeah... If anything, it's powering up! Look! Someone's coming through! Konnichiwa! Hehe. Look, he looks just like me if I were an anime character. That means you must have opened a portal to the Anime Universe! For crying out loud. Does ANYBODY know how to turn this thing off?! Quest reward: 200 and 20