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Dullards to Donuts/Quotes

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki



Waylon Smithers: Amazing! It's like the monkeys need those donuts.
Dr. Olberman: Oh yes, they cannot help themselves. Developing these highly desirable donuts was the easy part. Creating a marketing campaign that would appeal to both current and future users, now that was a challenge. But I believe we succeeded on both frotns by ysing a cartoon chaaracter, since people are suckers for anything that is endorsed by a fictional, animated figure.
Mr. Burns: Excellent! And now, Smithers, the next step in my plan. Ahoy, hoy. This is Mr. Burns... ...I am afraid that, due to budgetary concerns, i will be unable to further provide you with your daily supply of donuts. That is all. Carry on.
Homer: Nooooooooo!

Homer: ....and so... [MRMF]... family, there's going to be... [HARPH]... some cutbacks around here... [MUNCH]...
Marge: Homer, whow can we get by on half your pay?
Homer: I've got it all figured out. You won't have to buy food for me because Mr. Burns is giving us all the dounts we want.
Marge: Homer! You can't live on donuts alone!
Homer: Of course not, Marge. I'll need coffee for dunking and washing them down. Oh, and beer.

Apu: Ever since those donuts have appeared, my business has been down quite a pretty penny.
Bart: Hey mom, can i have a Bangladeshi Squishee? Can I? Huh? Can I?
Lisa: And may I have some organic gooey chewy bears? May I? Pleaes? May I?
Marge: Not to both of you. You know we all have yo cut back on extravagant spending since your father took that pay cut.
Bart & Lisa: Awwww.
Apu: You see? This is that about which I ahve been saying. If this keeps up... ..:I am actually going to have to offer competitive prices, and then it's no "zen and the art of the mosnter truck pull fantasy camp" for me.
Marge: Hmmm. I wonder if anyone else has been effected?

Mr. Burns: Olberman, you ninnyhammer, you made the donuts too addictive! All my workers are now so roly-poly they can barely move. I need you to reduce the addictive qualites of the donuts and take out the fat, but you can't deprive them of the taste or else they won't eat them and I'll have a plant full of workers in donut detox!
Dr. Olberman: We could use the fat substitute that I created for Yummy Yow! chips.
Mr. Burns: Yes, of course. That didn't have any negative side effects, did it?
Waylon Smithers: Actually sir, I've read that some of the fat substitutes that are on the market can cause...
Dr. Olberman: Not to worry! I too, know of those second rate compounds, and I assure you that my fat substitute causes no such unpleasantness.
Mr. Burns: Excellent!