Difference between revisions of "Maximum Homerdrive/Quotes"

Revision as of 14:24, August 13, 2012

Homer: "Well son, I guess it's time to go home."

Bart: "Any thoughts on how we're going to get there?"

Homer: "No, but I'm sure the good Lord will provide."

(nearby an engineer argues with a man in a military uniform)

Engineer: "Are you crazy? I'm not driving a trainload of napalm to Springfield." (throws his cap on the ground and walks off)

Homer: "Thank you."

Homer: "Look, son. It's one of Nature's most beautiful sights… the convoy."

'(one of the Trucks hits Homer's trailer)

Bart: "He hit us!"

Homer: "Oh, I should have known. They're hazing us, to initiate us into the truckers' fraternity. (the truck is hit again) Thank you sir, may I have another?"

Bart: "Dad, they're trying to kill us."

Homer: "Oh, why do all my trips end like this?"

Trucker 3: "All right, pal, here's the deal. You stumbled on a secret that only truck drivers are supposed to know…" (Homer giggles) "… Hey, pay attention and stop looking at that squirrel."

Trucker 2: "We get forty bucks an hour to drive these rigs. You think anybody'd hire us if they knew we weren't driving the trucks?"

Homer: "Wow, you guys are even lazier than me. Well, don't worry, I'll keep your secret."

Homer: "Uh, yeah. I need something that will keep me awake, alert, and reckless all night long."

Clerk: "Well, Congress is racing back to Washington to outlaw these." (shows him a bottle of pills)

Homer: "Sold!"

(Swallows the pills straight away)

Clerk: "Hey, you can't take that many pep pills at once."

Homer: "No problem, I'll balance it out with a bottle of sleeping pills."

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