Burger Meister/Quotes
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- Homer: Now, let's watch some Television that doesen't make us feel stupid or get angry or do anything with our fingers.
- Bart: You are the king of the sore losers, Homer.
- Sound:Klik
- Homer: I don't want my son beating me at anything in my own home. At least not until you'r a teenager.
- Bart: Oh, that day is coming, my friend.
- Marge: Homie, why don't you and Bart go outside and do something together.
- Homer: For you information, Marge, we are doing something togehter. We are trying to find something on TV we can watch togheter.
- Marge: Hrmmm...
- Homer: What do I have to buy to get that contest entry form?
- Squeaky-voiced teen: There's no purchase necessary, sir.
- Homer: All right, I'll take three Krusty Kolossal Burgers and an embiggened bucket o' fries.
- Squeaky-voiced teen: Sir, I said there was no purchase necessary.
- Homer: Okay! You twisted my arm! A Krustyshake and a chicken mustery meal, too! Crooks!
- Lisa: I'm glad you came to me, dad. There seem to be some discrepancies here.
- Homer: Discrepancies. Those are good, right?
- Lisa: No. What exactly did the commercial promise the contest winner?
- Homer: Money and fame!
- Lisa: Hmmm... if I know krusty, that means a Krusty Burger coupon book set to expire and a brief mention in the Krustyco Stockholders newsletter.
- Homer: Cheap food and the gratitude and admiration of Krusty's investors! That's good enoguh for me!
- Lisa: Why do I bother?
- Bart: Homer's making himself crazy over this contest. Even crazier than his usual nutty ideas.
- Milhouse: What happens when he comes up with the perfect burger? Does he send the burger to Krusty?
- Bart: Naw. He's supposed to write down the recipe on a postcard and mail it in to some place in Kansas.
- Milhouse: Oh. So he really doesn't ahave to make the burger.
- Bart: Yeah... say, that gives me an idea!
- Krusty: And now the moment some of you have been waiting for! The results of the Krusty Burger contest! Hyuk yuk yuk! Our board of culinary cut-ups are a boatload of Burgers to come up with out winner!
- Homer: Come on! Pick a postcard!
- Krusty: And the winner is... while wer'e youn, Mel! The winner is... ...from Springfield at 742 Evergreen Terrace....
- Homer: Woo-hoo!
- Lisa: That's our address!
- Marge: Oh, Homie..
- Krusty: ...Bart Simpson for his banana burger with muenster chese! Oh, for cyring of loud! Who's gonna choke that down!
- Homer: Bart?!
- Marge: You entered the contest, Bart?
- Bart: A hundred times or so.
- Lisa: Mom, shouldn't we stop dad before he hurts Bart?
- Marge: Well, at least thy're outside doing something togheter.