Homer's Triple Bypass/Quotes
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- Mr. Burns and Smithers are watching Homer wolf down donuts on a closed-circuit TV
- Montgomery Burns: Look at him, Smithers. Eating donuts! Keep eating, soon enough you will get to the poison donut!
- Waylon Smithers: Uh, sir...
- Mr. Burns: Well? There is a poison donut, is there not?
- Mr. Smithers: No sir, I removed it.
- Mr. Burns: Why did you do that?!
- Mr. Smither: I discussed the concept of a poison donut with the company lawyers, and they were all in agreement that that is considered murder.
- Mr. Burns: Curse their oily hides!
- Marge: "Hello? Oh my Lord!"
- (Marge hangs up phone and grabs her car keys)
- Marge: "I need to get to the hospital, my husband just had a heart attack!"
- (Marge rushes out the Simpsons residence)
- Patty: "Oh my God."
- Selma: "What?"
- Patty: "5 cents off wax paper!"
- (Selma slaps herself in shock, either oblivious or completely uncaring about Homer's plight or Marge's distress)
- Barney: "Originally I did not like it, but then I figured, if Homer wants to be a woman, who am I to judge?"
- Homer: "Barney! I am having heart surgery, not a sex change!"
- Barney: "Oh! Well, what do I do with this jumbo thong bikini?"
- Moe: "For old times' sake, I snuck in this bottle of beer."
- Homer: "Thanks a lot, Moe!"
- (Homer begins drinking)
- Moe: "Homer, that is not free, you know."
- Patty: "Marge, say hello to Andre!"
- Marge (enraged): "My husband is not dead yet! GET OUT!"
- Patty (curt): "Oh sorry, hope he recovers."
- Selma: "I do too."
- Andre: "I do not."
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