An Unconventional Romance/Quotes
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- Comic Book Guy: Not a dream, not a hoax, not an imaginary tale! I have actually found the perfect girl for me! Even her name has the alliterative cadence of a classic Superman sweetheart! I've waited a lifetime for a woman who gets me, who won't judge my cultural and physical nonconformity, yea, who even fins it tantalizing! We shall meet this weekend at the Bi-Mon-Sc-Fi-Con!
- Raphael: Good for you, pally. But if you're finished with your monthly reorders, I've got her stuff to do.
- Cloris Clane: Comic Book Guy, I was a little worried that you wouldn't look like your picture, but you're even sexier in person!
- Comic Book Guy: Please, call me guy! Cloris, my dear, I would like you to meet my friend, Evan. He is an "Ozzie" who writes fan fiction in which Ozzie Osbourne travels to The Land of Oz where Dr. Oz is the Wizard. Also, he's Australian.
- Evan: 'Ow ta goin', sheila?
- Comic Book Guy: Greetings, Shane. Shane is into cyclopean beings of the feminie persuasion.
- Cloris Clane: [whispering] Why is he staring at me like that?
- Comic Book Guy: Shane, I'll thank you to stop un-eyeing my girlfriend with your eyes!
- Cloris Clane:Boy, you sure have some weird friends. But I think it's so cool that you accept people for who they are, no matter what. Oh, cool! They have one issue I'm missing! It's costing me a year's rent, but now my collection is complete!
- Comic Book Guy: B-but that's a Bongo comic! I'm afraid it's not going to work out for us, Cloris Clan! I cannot associate myself with a lady of such questionable taste!
- Cloris Clane: ???! Well, if you insist. Hi, boys!
- Comic Book Guy: Good lord! [CHOKE] What have I done?!
