Fork It Over/Quotes

Quotes

[It's lunchtime at Springfield Elementary School. Nelson, Kearney and Bart are sitting at a table in the cafeteria.]

Nelson: [to Kearney] So I sez to her, "Mabel", I sez -- [interrupts himself to glance at his lunch tray] What the ... ? Half my French fries are gone!

[Nelson glares at Bart, who is sitting at the end of the table.]

Nelson: Hey Simpson, you didn't happen to filch my French fries, did you?

Bart: [innocently] How could I do that, Nelson? I'm three feet away!

[Behind Bart, Milhouse and Martin enter the cafeteria.]

Milhouse: Martin, you've got to see Bart's new fork!

[Bart says a silent "Uh-oh" to himself.]

Milhouse: [continuing, taking the fork from Bart] With this unique telescoping action, it can extend to three feet!

[Milhouse demonstrates, extending the fork to its full length. Martin looks impressed, but Bart smacks his forehead in dismay.]

Nelson: [suspicious] Izzat so?

[The scene shifts to outside. An obviously beaten-up Bart is lying in a dumpster with the extended fork wrapped around his neck.]

Lisa: Milhouse, what's my brother doing in the dumpster?

Milhouse: You can put the blame on his big fork!

Bart: And your big mouth!

[Nelson walks away from the dumpster, brushing his hands together.]

Nelson: Let that be a lesson to you, Simpson! [to himself] All this pummeling has given me an appetite. I think I'll go swipe somebody's lunch.