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Fork It Over/Quotes

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki



[It's lunchtime at Springfield Elementary School. Nelson, Kearney and Bart are sitting at a table in the cafeteria.]
Nelson: [to Kearney] "So I sez to her, 'Mabel', I sez --" [interrupts himself to glance at his lunch tray] "What the ... ? Half my French fries are gone!"
[Nelson glares at Bart, who is sitting at the end of the table.]
Nelson: "Hey Simpson, you didn't happen to filch my French fries, did you?"
Bart: [innocently] "How could I do that, Nelson? I'm three feet away!"
[Behind Bart, Milhouse and Martin enter the cafeteria.]
Milhouse: "Martin, you've got to see Bart's new fork!"
[Bart says a silent "Uh-oh" to himself.]
Milhouse: [continuing, taking the fork from Bart] "With this unique telescoping action, it can extend to three feet!"
[Milhouse demonstrates, extending the fork to its full length. Martin looks impressed, but Bart smacks his forehead in dismay.]
Nelson: [suspicious] "Izzat so?"

[The scene shifts to outside. An obviously beaten-up Bart is lying in a dumpster with the extended fork wrapped around his neck.]
Lisa: "Milhouse, what's my brother doing in the dumpster?"
Milhouse: "You can put the blame on his big fork!"
Bart: "And your big mouth!"
[Nelson walks away from the dumpster, brushing his hands together.]
Nelson: "Let that be a lesson to you, Simpson! [to himself] All this pummeling has given me an appetite. I think I'll go swipe somebody's lunch."