Take My Wife, Sleaze/Quotes
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- [Apu has just chased Homer's biker gang away with a broom.]
- Manjula: You promised me no more brooms.
- Apu: I know that is not your way, but we're in America now.
- Johnny Bobby: Doctors threw a party at the loony bin, You gotta be crazy if you want to get in,
- Napoleon is playing his imaginary sax,
- The dance floor's filling up with maniacs!
- Let's rock. Do the Mental House rock!
- Let's rock. Do the Mental House rock!
- If you'll dance with the Doc,
- He'll give you electro shock!
- If you'll dance with the Doc,
- He'll give you electro shock!
- Slam! slam! slam!
- Bart: [reading the note from the biker gang] "We had a good time crashing at your pad."
- Homer: Awwww.
- Bart: "PS: We've taken your old lady."
- Homer: D'oh!
- Attendant: Yeah, I did see some bikers drive by here with a blue-haired woman about ten minutes ago. Said they were gonna spend the night at that Crystal Lake camp ground. Section K, space 217. Yeah, I'm sorry I can't be of more help.
- Homer: I guess I'll never find her.
- Marge Simpson: And when you get a job interview, try not to call your employer a punk or a skank.
- Meathook: Makes sense.
- Ramrod: Ohh, don't call him skank.
- Meathook: Mrs. Simpson, I killed my pencil.
- Marge Simpson: Broke. You broke your pencil.
- Meathook: I... broke him.
- Marge Simpson: That's right. And what else have we learned?
- Ramrod: Oh oh, that violence is wrong.
- Marge Simpson: Excellent, Ramrod. Civilized people solve their disputes with words.
- [Homer jumps in screaming and punching]
- Marge Simpson: Stop! You don't understand!
- [Homer continues, attacking, punching, and throwing people]
- Meathook: Marge, what do we do here? Marge, he's using violence.
- Marge Simpson: Talk to him. Use your words.
- Meathook: Homer... Homer... stop. We've given up our violent ways. We just wanna live peacefully... with your wife.
- Homer Simpson: No! My wife is not a dooby... to be passed around! I took a sacred vow on my wedding day to bogart her forever.
- Marge Simpson: Oooooh, Homey.
- Meathook: There's only one reasonable way to settle this... you and me, in the circle of death.
- Marge Simpson: Oh, I just swept the circle of death.
