Maggie's Meltdown/Quotes
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- Marge: Homer, according to today's newspaper it's "take your daugheter to work day" today! And since you've got two daughters...
- Bart: What a rip! You mean, Lisa gets the day off, Maggie gets sprung out of the house... but I get stuck with Springfield Elementary School's same ol' same ol'?
- Lisa: Gee, dad, I'm really interested in seeing in The Springfield Nuclear Power Plant!
- Homer: Then see it you shall, Lisa! And you, too, li'l Maggie!
- Homer: Okay, Li'l Maggie... here's a picture of your favorite person to keep you smiling... and to help keep me goofing off!
- Mr. Burns: And what is the one's name, Smithers?
- Waylon Smithers: Um, Homer Simpson, sir.
- Mr. Burns: Ah yes... Simpkins! Happy "allow your vile offspring to interrupt production" day! ANd who is this she certainly looks familiar...
- Homer: Uh-oh! What if Mr. Burns recognizes Maggie? She once nearly shot him to death! Er.... this is my daighter Maggie, Mr. Burns! But you've never met her before! And I can assure you, she hardly ever carries any firearms!
- Carl Carlson: Hey, check it out, guys... a dozen fresh lard lad donuts—the deluxe assortment, too!
- Lenny Leonard: Wow! That means two with sprinkles...
- Homer: ...and a buttermilk cruller [GLAAAH!]
- Carl: Hey, all the meltdown alarms have stopped!
- Lenny: And all of the meter reading have dropped back to normal!
- Homer: Yeah, but that one cruller i'll never taste! [SIGH!]
- Homer: So, did you learn anything new today, Lisa?
- Lisa: Yes, I learned that I'm going to have to resort to more subersive tactics if I ever hope to effect any significant changes in our society!
- Homer: That's nice honey...